Disillusioned (Swept Away, #2)(15)

“Bianca?”

I blinked at Rosie, feeling cold inside. My arms had goose bumps and a hollowness was in my soul. My brain rattled as the unanswered questions knocked against my skull.

“Sorry. He wasn’t in,” I said quickly, and walked back to the couch.

“Oh, that’s it?” Rosie looked surprised. “You seemed to be having a longer conversation than just that.”

“She said that he had a message for me, but she couldn’t remember it.” I sank onto the couch and offered Rosie a weak smile. I wasn’t sure why I was lying to her. Something about the whole situation made me feel too uneasy. Too many holes were appearing in what I thought I knew. I wanted to stew on it all first. I felt guilty as I stared at her furrowed brows. I could tell that she didn’t believe me. “I’m feeling slightly tired.” I yawned and stretched. “I think I need a good night’s sleep.”

“It’s still morning.” She stared at me unblinking.

“Well, a midmorning siesta, like they do in Spain.” I paused. “Well, maybe not technically a siesta, but you know what I mean.”

“But you’re not Spanish.”

“I just need a rest. I’ve had a long week, Rosie. What with being kidnapped and all.” I offered her a weak smile, but she stared at me with no answering look of understanding.

“Bianca, you’ve just been kidnapped. You’ve had sex with the man that kidnapped you. You lost your dad recently. You’ve been through a lot. I really don’t want to leave you alone.”

“I’ll be fine.”

“How can you be sure that Mattias won’t kidnap you again?”

“Well, he let me go. . . .” I shrugged.

“Why, though? Why would he do that?”

“I don’t know.” A sick feeling hit my stomach and I felt the danger of my situation spreading through me. He had to have let me go for a reason. It didn’t make sense. Unless he fell for you, a small voice in my head whispered to me. I frowned at the little devil in my head. She was getting my hopes up and that was the last thing that I needed.

“It just doesn’t sound plausible, Bianca. Why would someone do that?”

“Sherlock Holmes said that it only has to be possible, not probable,” I muttered obstinately. “If something is possible, it can still be true.” He could like me for real, he really could.

“You’re confusing me.” She plopped down next to me. “What’s going on, Bianca? What else happened to you? Where were you?” She touched my shoulder. “Let me help you.”

“I don’t want to talk about it right now. I’m sorry. I’m just so tired. Thank you for coming over. Come back for dinner?” I gave her an apologetic smile and yawned. “I just really need to sleep for a few hours. My brain has been in overdrive and I’m physically and mentally exhausted.”

“I have a date tonight,” she said hesitantly. “But I can come—”

“No, you don’t need to come back tonight.” I offered her a smile, not wanting her to see how relieved I felt. “I feel awful. I still don’t know much about your boyfriend or anything. I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine.” She clasped my hand. “We can talk about it later.” She sighed as she stared at me. “I don’t know if I want you to be alone. What if someone comes back and tries to kidnap you again? What are you going to do now? I don’t want to just leave you.”

“I’m going to sleep and then I’m going to see if I can watch some movies and write some articles and get my mind off of this whole ordeal for a few hours.” Not that that would be possible. There was no way that I’d be able to just watch a movie, but I didn’t want Rosie to know that. I jumped up off the couch and Rosie stood up as well. I ran my hands through my hair and stifled a half yawn.

“I guess you do need sleep.” She stepped back. “I don’t want to just leave you by yourself, I just got here.”

“I’ll be okay. It was good to see you. I just need to rest, then I’ll be able to tell you everything. I just don’t want to go through all of it right now.” I smiled an apology. “I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be sorry, Bianca.” She reached over and hugged me. “I’m the one who should be sorry. I’m the one who blew it. I’m going to make it up to you, I promise.”

“It’s okay. I’m just glad to have you as a friend.” I squeezed her hand. “I’m not sure what I’d do if I didn’t have you in my life. You’re my best friend and I know I can always count on you.”

“Call me if you need anything.” She walked toward the door and then looked back at me. “And if you need to talk or figure anything out, I’m here.”

“Thanks, Rosie.” I got up and walked her to the door, then locked it behind her. I felt lighter once she was out of the apartment and I wasn’t sure why. I hurried back to my couch so I could look through the papers again, to see if there were any clues that I’d missed. I opened the plastic bag that I’d removed from Rosie’s purse and pulled out a stack of papers, still feeling unsettled about my conversation. Something she’d said had put me on edge, but I wasn’t sure what it was. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but something felt off.