Crushed (Torn #7)(56)

However, the moment I did, I saw Amber in a different light. All these years, this chick, no matter the situation, was always there, consistently, persistently. When I was feeling down and shitty, she never failed to tell me how much I meant to her, how much she loved me, even though she thought I was stupid. For years, it became a habit, hearing her say those three magical words that never failed to make me feel like a king. I didn’t realize how magical they were until she stopped saying them. Then I knew I was in trouble because it seemed that the harder I tried to win her affection back, the more she pushed me away.

There was no win-win with her. I knew it was bad to use sex, but it was the only way I knew how to make her connect with me. Her body always gave in. It was the only thing I had, so I manipulated that. Of course, I confessed all these deeds to her and knew I had so much to make up for. Trust me, I was looking forward to so much “making up” with her.

I loved her simplicity and quiet elegance. I loved her golden eyes and drop-dead, gorgeous smile. Amber was the quiet strength behind my sanity. It took me so f*uking long to know how much she contributed to my life, and there was no way in hell I was going to let her go. She and I were stuck together, for better or for worse. She was going to have me on a silver platter.

Smiling as I took her hand while the other gripped the steering wheel, I knew we were moving in the right direction. I had never been so content and happy with my life. I knew this was it. She was it.

I hoped it wouldn’t come out as a shock, but I did intend to ask her later this week to move in with me. Everything was set in my mind, and I hoped she wouldn’t feel as though I was moving too fast. There was no way I could do this other than fast, though. Come to think of it, who liked doing things slow, anyway?

We would scout for a place to live while she finished up her senior year and I began training camp in LA. It wasn’t the ideal solution, but it was the best shot we had to make it work.

After the past we had both had, I needed her to be reassured that I wasn’t going anywhere. She had loved me through the years, so I could do the same for her—love and nurture her the way she was supposed to be. No man would ever hurt her again. Not her father or any other guy. I was going to protect her until death.

My protectiveness over her should have been one of the first indicators for my feelings for her, but hey, at least I had finally gotten to where I needed to be.

For the first time in a very long time, I was excited about what the cards had in store for me. With the right woman next to me, I knew I could take on whatever challenges came my way.