Crushed (Torn #7)(55)

Apologetic, he strolled towards me then chose to stand before my crying state. “I honest to God didn’t know you’d be there. After how we left things, I wasn’t sure you were going to be, because I thought you left and never planned to come back.”

His stupid answer, the way he was skirting around it, made me bawl even harder. I kid you not, it was harder to put a sad halt to this conundrum. Therefore, I kept crying like a wailing baby in the manger or, as people referred to it these days, having an “ugly cry.” Yep, this was me. Pathetic, ol’ me.

“Amber…” he said, trying to get my attention as he cupped my face before leaving a soft kiss on my forehead. Then he proceeded to seek my eyes, my tear-filled gaze. “I didn’t do anything with Joanna.”

Not even his answer did anything to cure this damn thing. It was like a disease; it kept on going.

“Why not? What stopped you?” I asked in between hiccups.

“Because I gave you my word that I won’t hurt you, so I’ll wait … until you’re over me before I really move on.”

This was all too much. He was just too much.

“Why would you sacrifice so much for me? I’m not worthy of it.” I had been pushing him away, and in a sense, he was still respecting me. It was odd and unheard of.

“Say whatever you like, but in my eyes, you’re worth everything.”

I shook my head, not believing that particular lie.

“Lindsey is your everything,” I said, knowing too well how much he loved her.

“I love her, but in a sense, I have accepted that she’s moved on, and I’m actually looking forward to the next chapter in my life,” he said cautiously before continuing, “and I want you in this new chapter, Amber. I know what you’re thinking, and that’s why I have been patient—sometimes—about waiting for you, because I know it might take some time for you to believe me. But you have to understand, it’s been over six months since Lindsey. She’s always going to mean something to me, but she’s the past, and I feel as though you’re my future. I might not be making sense, but it took me quite a long time to get here, so please, give me a chance to prove things to you. I’ve always cared for you. You were always in the back of my mind, yet I never pursued it until recently, and that’s when things started to make sense.

“Lindsey is the past—our past. I don’t want you to feel threatened by my past relationship with her, because that is over and done with. Things with you are different. I’m more relaxed, protective in a sense that’s scary sometimes. I have never felt this about anyone, but you kept pushing me away, leaving me doubting my chances with you. I want to protect you. I want to take care of you. You have to let me love you.”

Love, that elusive word again.

If it were any other man, I would jump into this in a heartbeat, but this was Brody. If I let him in the way he wanted, it might shatter me in more ways than were imaginable. It was as if I would be giving someone all the power to hurt me, and quite frankly, it was petrifying to think that one person in the world could have such an effect on anyone. I had so many issues, but I knew I needed him, too.

“If I do let you in again, you promise to take care of my heart this time?”

“I’ll protect it for as long as I live,” he swore before reaching for my lips, gently kissing me. “I love you. I know it’s been confusing, but my actions have been quite obvious. I just didn’t want to scare you away by telling you how I feel. I had to let you come to terms with things first … and I’m sorry for telling you now. It seems like you’re not taking it well, but I can’t hold it in anymore, Amber. I love you. I’m in love with you, and I want everyone to know.”

Shaking my head in protest, I felt dizzy from hearing his declaration. “You must be crazy. How can you love me? This is insane. I can’t—it’s just not possible.”

“Then let me prove you wrong.”

Could I? Could I do it again? Could I love him to no end, yet this time we would officially be dating and looking forward to our future? Was that even possible?

It was.

I merely had to say yes, and I would have him … for as long as I could.

“I love you. That’s all I know.” How true that statement was. It was all I had ever known.

Maybe my fate would always be with him, so why should I keep denying our hearts’ wishes? I was done for. Fighting off my love for him was pointless, so I was better off letting it be, letting it flourish the way life intended it to be.

And it would be that way.





Chapter Twenty-Nine


Brody





It had only been a week since we had told all of our friends that we were officially together. And tonight, we were heading to Malibu for Emma and Bass’s baby shower.

Was I nervous? No. f*uk no. I had wanted to be with her for quite some time, and for her to finally give in … Well, that was the best feeling a guy could ask for.

I got what she was afraid of, most especially the shadow of my relationship with Lindsey. But she had to understand that my grieving period was over and done with, and it had more to do with holding on to something my mind had been accustomed to all these years. It didn’t necessarily mean Lindsey and I were compatible. Let’s face it, she and I were opposites, even if it took me a long time to finally realize that.