Collided: Dirty Air (Book 2)(97)

A pair of shoes stops in front of me, my drunken reflection shining off the leather. I look up, thinking I’ll find Liam, except Jax’s smiling face greets me. His crazy curls are kept down with rows of short braids, and his grin does little to comfort me. A pang of something happens in my chest at seeing Jax instead of Liam, but my brain feels too numb to register the sensation.

“Come on, love. Leave the two of them to get their rocks off.” Jax squats down, his hazel eyes leveling with mine. “Let’s turn that frown upside down. What do you say? We don’t have to tell Liam because the wanker’s been in a terrible mood ever since your little romp in the desert.”

I grab his extended hand while picking up the champagne bottle, not willing to part ways just yet.

Jax tsks at me like he scorns a child. His tattooed hand wraps around the bottle, faux skeleton fingers pulling at the neck and placing it on a random table. “I think we’ve had enough of that to last a lifetime.”

“Says the man who chugs champagne for a living.”

“Hey, I may be a world champion at chugging bubbly for a living, but I place on some podiums too.” He winks at me.

I laugh until I start hiccupping again. Jax talks like he doesn’t have an F1 World Championship win under his belt.

He leads us through the crowd, going slow since I continuously trip over my sneakers. My eyes land on Liam who stands by himself, dark and gloomy in a corner. I give him a lame wave with wiggling fingers. His frown deepens, not amused by my sudden friendliness.

Jax takes me outside the ballroom. We ride an elevator down to the ground level, the silence between us giving way to confusion at why he wants to help me. I hurt his best friend. His help doesn’t make sense unless Liam sent him.

Stop wishing for things that aren’t there, Sophie.

I don’t get a chance to ask him because once we walk outside and fresh air hits me, my stomach rolls and my head swims. My body teeters.

“Oh no, you don’t.” Jax grabs my hair before the champagne betrays me, my stomach revolting against me as acid hits my throat.

“Shit, Sophie. I really loved these shoes. You’re lucky my best mate loves you enough to buy me a new pair.”

I don’t remember anything else except for Jax’s voice, sounding more concerned than pissed. My world fades to black, a welcome feeling to ease me from the ache in my chest, pain giving in to numbness.





34





Liam





I wish I could confess my feelings to Sophie. But I’m a coward, mulling over our relationship and my future instead of chasing after it. Despite my brother’s help and my parents’ verbal ass-whooping, I still struggle to come to grips with my wants versus needs.

I’m afraid. I didn’t think my family calling me out on my secrets would’ve fucked with my head this much. But here I am, worried about conceding to Sophie’s love.

I’m not scared of loving her. That would be simple and stupid as fuck. I can’t help fearing the very worst, like everything that comes after the big I love you back. Thoughts of things going wrong between us make my stomach roll.

Until I can come to grips with my emotions, I need to stay away from Sophie, for her sake and mine. Everyone is right. She deserves the world, and until I can guarantee that I can give it to her, I don’t deserve to hang in her orbit.

I follow Jax out of the gala, watching him help out a sick Sophie. She passes out in the grass once her legs give out. Pain grips my heart in a chokehold, knowing she’s hurting because of me.

“I hate seeing her this way.” I grab her from the ground, her body curling into mine like she knows who carries her.

“Because she smells like a podium after a Prix?” Jax winces at his messed-up shoes.

“No, you idiot. Because I’m the reason she drank to the point of blacking out.”

A random bulb flashes, my eyes squinting at the unexpected invasion. A few more flashes go off as a few reporters ask questions about Sophie and me. The bright lights affect my vision, my anger surging at their disregard for privacy.

“What the fuck,” Jax growls.

“Shit. This isn’t good. Grab her purse and call the car. Now.” I turn my back toward the paparazzi, shielding Sophie while power walking toward the hotel’s valet area.

Tomorrow, I’ll deal with the fallout of those pictures. I need to get her back to her room before we run into any other vultures looking for a trashy story. She grumbles into my chest, her fist clutching onto the fabric of my tux.

My head throbs with conflicting emotions. I’m happy to be near Sophie again, while distraught and angry at her for getting shit-faced, and downright pissed at myself for hurting us. I want my friend back, but most importantly, I want her back. All of her.

Jax helps me grab a car and walks with me up to Sophie’s room. He hangs around the suite while I help Sophie in her bedroom, wanting to ease her discomfort as much as I can. She wakes up enough to let me brush her teeth, remove her makeup, and get a set of pajamas on.

I place her on her favorite side of the bed and set up a trash can nearby just in case. She looks small with her body curled up. It pains me to watch her while avoiding how much I want to cuddle next to her, banishing away her hurt while easing my desire to be close to her.

Resisting the urge, I head on out to the living room.