Chasing Abby(66)


We use the outdoor shower to rinse off, then we sit on the wooden rocking swing on the porch for a while until we’re no longer dripping. Every once in a while, we hear some movement inside the house. Jimi and her friend are probably enjoying the fact that I’m gone. Probably celebrating by dancing in their pj’s.
“You ready to face the dragon?” Caleb says, wiggling his eyebrows.
“Can I use you as a human shield?”
“Yeah, baby. You know how much I like it when you use me.”
I shove him and he laughs as I head for the front door. I enter the breakfast nook keenly aware of my bare feet and my damp salty clothes. If I can just avoid Jimi long enough to take a shower and put on some clean clothes, this will be much easier.
We practically tiptoe through the kitchen and the downstairs hallway, past the living room, and up the stairs to Jimi’s bedroom. My heart clenches inside my chest when I see both my suitcase and the rollaway bed are gone. That must be what all the racket was inside the house when Caleb and I were on the porch. She must have been erasing all traces of my existence.
I cover my face and draw in a stuttered breath as the tears begin to fall. “Why does she hate me so much?”
Caleb takes me into his arms and strokes my hair. “Don’t worry, sunshine. She just doesn’t know you. And if she wants you out this bad, we’ll leave tonight. Let’s just wait for the rest of the family to get back so you can say good-bye.”
“No, I want to leave now,” I whisper, the pain in my chest spreading into my stomach, making me physically sick. “I can’t do this anymore. If they don’t understand why I had to leave, then I don’t care. I don’t want to have anything to do with them. Why?”
“Why what?”
“Why did I come here and put myself through this? Why did I think this would turn out well? Am I really that naive?”
Caleb holds my face in his hands and looks me in the eye. “You’re not naive. You’re just hopeful. You’re like sunshine and she—”
“She what?”
He lets go of my face and squeezes past me, then he heads straight for Jimi’s bed. He picks up a folded piece of light-blue notepaper off the comforter and stares at it for a moment before he turns around and holds it out to me.
“What is it?”
He shrugs. “I don’t know, but it has your name on it.”
I swipe my arm across my nose and take the paper from him. I unfold it slowly and my body aches with dread when I see my name written in Jimi’s handwriting. But I swallow my fear and continue reading. By the time I read the last line, I’m a disgusting, weeping mess.
“What does it say?” Caleb whispers, pulling me into his arms but never trying to sneak a peek at the letter.
I dig my fists into his back as I hold on to him and cry into his damp T-shirt. “It’s… it’s an apology.”
“Really?”
“Really.”
I whip my head around at the sound of Jimi’s voice and I’m surprised to see her standing in the threshold of her bedroom door, her eyes pink and puffy. She sniffs loudly as tears roll down her face.
“I’m sorry I was a jerk to you,” she says, staring at the floor as she wipes the tears from her cheeks. “Please don’t go. I promise I’ll stop being a jerk. Just… please don’t go yet. It would break my—our parents’ hearts.”
I let go of Caleb and I walk slowly toward her. “I’ve never had a sister or brother. My mom told me that after what happened with my adoption, my parents were turned off on the whole process and they decided to not put themselves through it again. I think she told me that hoping it would influence my feelings toward my birth parents. Like I would blame them for the fact that I never had any siblings.” I reach forward and take her hand in mine and she’s still staring at the floor. “But I never felt that way. I knew that I didn’t have siblings because my parents weren’t strong enough to deal with the process. Not because my birth parents made it difficult. Just like I know… our parents aren’t responsible for how you reacted to me coming here.”

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