Carnage: Book #1 The Story Of Us (Volume 1)(148)

Just to make sure that I’m not flying pregnant, he makes the cabbie stop at a chemist on the way to the hotel and buys two pregnancy tests, luckily I need to wee pretty much as soon as we are in our room and we sit on the edge of the bath tub and stare at the little stick I hold in my hands.

“What if it’s positive, you gonna make me stay here for the next nine months?” He grins his lopsided grin at me.

“Well first, I would kiss you till your lips were numb, because I would be the happiest man in the world and second, I… I don’t know I’d just carry on being the happiest man in the world.”

We stare as one line appears on the stick, not pregnant, I feel a little surge of disappointment, so I look at him and shrug. “The pill will take at least six months to clear my system, January, that’s when we’ll get pregnant, but let’s get home and get trying any way.”

He tilts his head to one side. “Naaa, let’s get trying now.”

He drags me back to the bedroom and jumps on me, but the look of disappointment on his face didn’t go unnoticed, but I’m not worried, I’ve been on the pill for sixteen years, I’m not expecting to get knocked up yet, besides, I want to see in the new year with a bang. It’s the first time in years neither Jimmie or Ash are pregnant over Christmas and we can actually all have a proper celebration in New York where the band are playing at a special New Year’s Eve concert to see in the year 2000.

Around thirty long hours later we are back at our home in Hampstead, North West London. I call my Mum, Jimmie and Ash and let them know we are home. We spend the next week hardly leaving our bed, not because we are continuously having sex, although a lot of that does go on, but because we are so jet lagged from the flight and the time difference. Sean runs his business dealings from his phone whilst still in bed, I mostly sleep.

* * *

The following weekend is when we were due home and I’d completely forgotten the boys were off to France to play at some sporting event. I really don’t feel like getting on another plane so soon after the trip back from Australia so instead I arrange a girls night out with Ashley and Jimmie, as luck would have it, the boys record label have invitations to a new club opening in Shoreditch.

We all meet up at the Docklands penthouse, the boys still own it and we all use it at various times after nights out in the city when we need somewhere to crash. It feels like years since we’ve all gotten ready together like this, probably because it is. We take forever as we talk and drink and have a general catch up, we’ve spoken on the phone almost daily since I’ve been back in the country but I haven’t seen them in almost a year and there are a few tears as soon as we set eyes on each other. By the time we finally make it down to the car, where Dave is waiting to drive us, it’s already eleven thirty pm and we’re all well on our way to being legless.

The club is a warehouse conversion, pretty much like every other building in and around East London but it looks great, the sound system is pumping and the girls are desperate to dance. I did a pregnancy test this morning, just to make sure and as it was negative, I joined my girls in a couple of lines of coke before we left and I’m now feeling the effect and can’t wait to hit the dance floor. The place is full of celebrities, actors, models, footballers, pop stars and the usual bunch of glamour models that always seem to get invites to this type of thing. The waiters and waitresses come around with an endless supply of champagne and there’s a free bar for anything else. While the girls are still on the dance floor, I head to the toilets and on the way back decide to grab us a round of shots. I stand at the bar waiting to be served when a shiver goes through me, before I get the chance to wonder what could have caused it a deep voice says right into my ear.