Caged (Mastered, #4)(86)
Damn Chaz and his sweet concern; now she wanted to bawl again. And she thought she’d been holding it together pretty well. “I love you, and thanks for caring about me, but I . . . can’t.”
“You mean you won’t.”
“No, Chaz, I mean I can’t.”
He kissed her knuckles. “Okay, sugar lump, I’ll stop nagging you. But whenever you change your mind, I’m right there. No questions asked.”
? ? ?
AFTER Presley, Chaz, and Amery had all failed to get through to her, Amery called in the big gun.
Ronin.
Molly had gone mute when gorgeous, mysterious, intuitive Sensei Black stopped in front of her desk on Friday morning. Even after she’d known him for almost two years, she didn’t really know him. That was the way he preferred it.
He studied her for the longest time. Then he said, “Grab some coffee. Amery cleared out of her office so we can talk privately.”
She shook her head.
“Molly. I’m the only person who knows all about his past.”
“All of it?”
He nodded. “I know that’s why you haven’t talked to anyone. But you can talk to me about it.”
“All right. Just . . . give me a minute.”
“Take your time.”
She filled her mug and meandered to Amery’s office. She paused in the doorframe and studied Ronin.
He lounged in Amery’s desk chair. He could’ve taken a seat on the couch and made this more casual, but that wasn’t his style. Keeping a semblance of formality suited her. She’d be less likely to break down. She’d done that enough.
Molly closed the door behind her and settled into the guest chair across from Amery’s desk.
Ronin Black excelled at the waiting game, but today he jumped right in. “Give me the basics of what you know.”
“Deacon’s twin brother, Dante, died in a car accident when they were fifteen. His birth name isn’t McConnell, but Westerman. His family is Texas-oil rich. I found all this out during a dinner with Deacon’s cousin Tag.” She swigged her sweetened coffee, but the scalding liquid didn’t wash away the bitter taste those words left in her mouth.
“Look, I’d be pissed too if I’d found out the way you did.”
“That’s your way of saying you’ve known all along.”
“Because of my family, background checks are the norm when any new person comes into my life.”
Molly raised her eyebrows. “Even Amery?”
“Even her. You can imagine how pleased she was when she discovered I’d had her investigated.” He shared a quick grin.
“Where’d you meet Deacon?”
“At an underground fight in Pueblo. He’d been undefeated in the south for two years. So he was understandably pissed when I beat him.”
“You whipping up on him loosened his tongue and he blurted out his life story to you?” Dammit. She hadn’t meant to sound cynical.
“No. His willingness to confide in me wasn’t because of me but because he was finally ready to talk to someone.”
Molly didn’t believe that. When Ronin Black stared at you with that piercing gaze, you had the overwhelming urge to confess every transgression, just to get him to stop dissecting your soul.
“Even at the time I knew he hadn’t told tell me everything.” Ronin sighed. “I’m not sure I know the whole story even now.”
You don’t know the whole story either, her conscience prodded her. You left Deacon before he could explain. She understood the mind-set of keeping your own counsel—she’d done it for years with her own family situation—but she was not in the wrong here.
“When I offered him an instructor’s job,” Ronin continued, “I had him thoroughly checked out.”
“Deacon didn’t pass his background check?”
“He passed. In fact, his record was squeaky clean. Maybe it makes me a judgmental prick, but Deacon had the tats, the shaved head, and the attitude. Guys like that don’t get through life unscathed. When I asked him specifics, he told me enough to get a better understanding of him. He trusted me, and that’s something I don’t take lightly, Molly, because Deacon doesn’t trust anyone. He keeps to himself—or at least he did up until the last year or so.” Ronin paused again. “Knox and Deacon are tight and have been from day one. But even after five years of being his friend, Knox doesn’t know about Deacon’s past—that’s how painful it is for him to talk about.”
“That’s what I don’t get. We hadn’t even been dating a week and my grandma died. He dropped everything to be with me. He could’ve at least told me about his brother then.”
“I disagree.”
Her gaze returned to his. “Why?”
Ronin studied her.
The man was scary as hell in Sensei mode.
“You were grieving. Contrary to popular belief, misery doesn’t love company. Deacon telling you about his twin’s death would’ve taken away from your grief.”
“Bullshit.”
He shrugged. “You say that now. But we both know if you were pouring your heart out to him and he interjected that he knew exactly how you felt, you would’ve been resentful.”
That knocked her back a step. Was that true?