Brutally Beautiful(62)

“What’s that even f*cking mean?” He asked.

I ignored the question. “She said I had PTSD.”

“You do, Kade, face up to it. Get f*cking help. I miss my brother.”

“I want her,” I growled again, as if I was sporting to have a tantrum.

Dylan leaned forward, talking low, eyes shifting behind me to see the door. “You didn’t see her when she first came here, mate. She could barely walk straight. Bree had a fat lip and a bruise across her face, but Lainey… Lainey needed a hospital and wouldn’t go to one, and it didn’t seem like it was because she was afraid of doctors, Kade. I think she’s afraid of the police. I think something is wrong…the way Bree talks about her…did you know Bree and Lainey’s brother were engaged…” he whispered. He pointed his finger at me. “I’m not going to let you hurt her, because the only reason Bree is here is because Lainey is here, and I’m not ready to give Bree up yet, mate.”

“Dylan, don’t go getting your silk panties in a twist, yeah? I know she has some sort of wooly situation she’s hiding from, but I want her and I have no clue how to deal with any of these feelings. If anyone is going to be getting hurt, it’s going to be me.”

“You’re a real dick sometimes. You’re just going to bring her down,” he whispered, shaking his head.

“Hey, I lived through attempted murder and a massacre, cut me some slack. Aren’t I supposed to get like a ‘get out of jail’ card for it, or some sort of sympathy card?” I smiled pathetically.

His eyes widened from the carefree lightness of my plea, “Kade, you’re cracking jokes about it? This girl is really changing you, isn’t she?”

“She’s so different. She doesn’t have to get naked to get a man’s attention. She just has to walk in a room, glide in with her watery movements, and when she speaks, it’s of substance. You f*cking want, no…you need to listen. She’s profound. It’s ruthless on my soul. She is a woman who still blushes when a man looks at her. She’s not a child, you know she’s lived some sort of difficult life and the mystery of her is breaking me. I want her to crack and break in my hands. I want to open her up and gut her.”

“Never thought I’d see the day,” my brother whispered, smiling.

“The memory of her taste has me crazy,” I added. Every detail of that kiss was still felt; I could still smell her, feel her and taste her. God, thinking about it made my cock ache for her.

“Taste?” He asked.

“I f*cking kissed her.”

“So what do you want me to do?” He asked, leaning forward.

“Tell me I should try, and that I might be able to be good enough for someone...”

“Kade, man, that’s every one’s fear. But, if this woman is getting you to come out of your self, then I’m all for it, just don’t hurt her. Stop scaring her and tell her everything. Talk to her, talk to me, talk to someone. Please try, because God, Kade, I bloody miss my brother. I can see it, you know, these past few months. This girl is changing you. She’s bringing you back from the dead, Kade.”

The thought brought me to my knees. Metaphorically, my brother would call me a * if I did that in front of him. Doesn’t count that I had to strain to hold myself up with my arms. Doesn’t matter, because he was right.

“And Kade?”

“Yeah?”

“Don’t take this the wrong way, but when you talk about her and what she does to your insides, mate, it sounds a lot like falling in love with someone.”