Broken(61)

“I’m glad you like it.”

Jocelyn ate another spoonful but this time chased it with some cornbread. “Why wouldn’t I?” she asked with her mouth full.

He raised one broad shoulder into a shrug. “I don’t know. You’ve been living the big city life for a while now. I reckoned you’d have a taste for fancier fare.”

She placed her spoon down. “Cade, I’m not the exact same girl who left this ranch all those years ago, but I haven’t changed that much. To be honest, all that foo foo stuff they serve at those big fancy parties isn’t really my cup of tea. I hate caviar. Pate makes me gag. I still haven’t been able to try sushi, and please don’t get me started on steak tartar. I like my meat cooked, thank you very much. Trust me, this chili is probably the best thing I’ve eaten in a while.”

A slow smile split his face, making those deep dimples she loved pop out. He was so handsome, and he was still in love with her. “Thanks. That really means a lot. You always did know the right thing to say to make me feel good about myself. I was so damned nervous trying to get everything just right before you came over.”

“You didn’t have to go to so much trouble for me.”

“Why shouldn’t I have? You’re worth the effort. And, I intend on spending the rest of my life showing you just how worth it you are.”

Jocelyn should have been ecstatic at the thought that someone as wonderful as Cade was willing to stick by her side regardless of what had happened to her. Still, she couldn’t shake the feeling she was doing him a disservice. A man like Cade deserved everything his heart desired. If they were together as he wanted them to be, she would be denying him the children she knew he’d eventually want. Though the doctors said there was a chance she could conceive, the chance was slim to none. That wasn’t enough of a guarantee for her.

She lowered her lids, unable to meet the expectant gleam in his eyes. “Cade, I only agreed to this one date.”

“You also admitted your love for me, which means I’m not going to allow you to push me out of your life because you feel you have to do the right thing by me. If you’re worried so much about having children, then we’ll adopt. Giving birth or contributing sperm doesn’t make you a parent. Look at me and my brothers. Aunt Earlene raised us as her own when our parents died. She loved us just as much as any biological mother could have. I can’t believe you’d let something like this stand in the way of our happiness.”

He was breaking down all of her defenses and pretty soon she’d be too weak to not give in to him. She had one more card to play. Raising her chin in defiance, she looked him straight in the eyes. “What about sex, Cade?”

A frown marred his forehead. “What about it?”

“Wouldn’t you agree it’s an important part of a relationship?”

“Of course, it is. But that wouldn’t be a problem with us. Whenever we were together, we set the world on fire.”

“Yes, then. But now, I’m not so sure it’s possible.”

His eyes clouded with confusion as he shook his head back and forth as though trying to make sense of what she was telling him. “But when we kissed earlier, it was great just as it always has been.”

“Because it was only a kiss.”

His eyes narrowed to blue slits. “Maybe I’m a little slow tonight, because you’re going to have to spell it out for me.”

Jocelyn took a deep breath and forced herself to hold his gaze. “The kiss was great, like you said, but I don’t think I’m capable of going any further than a kiss. My body shuts down on me after a certain point.”