Breathe In (Just Breathe, #1)(105)



“Joe, of course,” he says without hesitation. “He’s like a brother.”

“Well, that pairing works with Emma being maid of honor,” Jimmy points out. “But, you’ll need to consider who the next two will be given that they’ll be paired with Jared and Nathan. If they aren’t gay, you’ll need two heterosexual men who are completely comfortable with their own sexuality and won’t mind escorting them.”

“Well, since I don’t have any brothers and I hardly see any of my cousins to be close to them like Maggie is with her’s, I guess then next in line could be you and Allen,” Henry states.

“Seriously! Oh my God!” Jimmy shouts. “This is going to be the best wedding ever!”

“Have you guys picked a location or date yet?” Allen continues.

“Shit guys, they just got engaged last night. I think they need some time to talk about it,” I pronounce before taking another large sip of my wine and completely emptying the glass.

“Maggie does have her wedding binder. Remember, Emma?” Nathan reminds.

Crap. I almost forgot all about her picture binder.

Since she was sixteen, Maggie has had visions of grandeur when it comes to planning her wedding day. The weekend after we popped each other’s cherries, she showed it to me. Then a small book, now a three ring binder full of years worth of photos and ideas of her ideal wedding with everything planned down to the last detail, minus the date and the groom. The groom changed each time she dated a guy or had a crush on a movie star. I know that Henry’s face is now tapped on the shoulders of the groom’s body she has next to her’s in a mock wedding photo.

“A what?” Jimmy inquires.

“She’s basically been planning her wedding since before Emma and I meet her,” Jared informs. “The only two things that were always tentative was the wedding date and the actual groom. If she wanted too, she could have her entire wedding in two or three months given that at least one of her desired venues has an opening.”

“That’s a great idea!” Henry comments.

“What is, honey?” Maggie questions.

“Let’s get married at the end of the summer, in the beginning of August, before my last year of MBA classes begin. We can take a short honeymoon and then an extended one during the winter season.”

My eyes glaze over at Henry’s words. What the hell? Is he really serious? I know he has the money to pull it off. There’s no doubt there. Can Maggie handle that? Can their families handle that? Can I handle that?

“Here,” Jared offers handing me his glass.

“Thanks,” I mutter, then finish the last half of his Mai Tai.

Shock consumes me and lingers through the rest of dinner. I have trouble focusing on comments regarding wedding things so I simply nod in agreement to anything Maggie directs my way. Jared whispers that he’s taking mental notes and will fill me in when I’m in a better state. I nod appreciatively as I stuff my face with food since there is nothing left to drink other than water.

My anxiety lessens when the waitress returns with another glass of wine for me. I instruct her to bring another one in exactly ten minutes. Without judgment, she smiles and agrees. I continue to stuff my face and drink until I literally have no room left.

On the rest of the drive back to the hotel, I’m grateful not to be in the same vehicle as Maggie and Henry. Jared and Nathan joined them to assist with my needed distance until my mind settles and can accept and move forward with the events that have taken place the past two nights.


Instinctually while driving, Joe takes my hand to comfort me.

“Oh my God. I knew it,” Jimmy blurts. “I knew something was going on between the two of you.”

“It’s not what you think,” Joe firmly comments in a serious tone.

“Yes there is. Why else would you be holding her hand?” Jimmy contends.

His words snap my attention back to reality and I instantly pull my hand away.

Joe reaches over and takes my hand before replying, “Emma has trouble being in cars.”

“What kind of trouble?” Jimmy gently presses.

“The bad kind,” Joe informs with a stern tone.

Joe’s defensiveness surprises me, especially since it’s directed towards his brother. I’m surprised he has never mentioned my issue with cars to Jimmy, especially after having the nightmare at his home just before we came here.

Not liking the tension I have caused and how long it’s lingering in the car, I share. “My parents died in a car accident.”

“Oh my . . . I’m sorry, Emma,” Jimmy apologies.

“Me too. We didn’t know. Joe didn’t tell us,” Allen sheepishly adds.

“It’s not my business to tell,” Joe defends.

“It’s okay,” I assure all of them. “They didn’t know and . . .” my voice trails off.

“It’s okay, Emma. We understand,” Jimmy consoles. He and Allen both reach forward and place their hands on my shoulders which helps.

Back in the suite, I opt to change into my swimsuit and head to the beach for an early evening swim. Even with all of the hiking, my body craves more strenuous activity to relax the tension and help me sleep. I plan on sleeping through the night — no more bad dreams. The guys from my suite join me, though Jimmy and Allen choose to get a few drinks at the bar first. As we settle at a casabella lounger on the Beachwalk, Jared and Nathan join us too.

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