Bound for Me (Be for Me #4)(69)

“For you,” he said simply. “I’ll always be here for you, if you’ll let me.” His words tumbled. “Do you understand? I’m here because I can’t stand that I hurt you. Can’t stand it without you. I want you to come back. I love you.”

That pierced. Hard. “You can’t love me.” She finally spoke—total croaky voice.

“Why not?”

“It’s too quick.”

Something flashed in his eyes. “Does that mean you don’t love me?”

He had her there. And he knew it.

“Savannah, I hurt you so badly that you ran away. You, the brave, never let the bullies get to you, courageous woman, ran away because of some dumb things I said. You know what that tells me?”

She shook her head.

“Apart from the fact that I’m a first class idiot…” he winced. “That tells me that you care.”

“You’re wrong.”

His eyes widened.

“I’m not courageous.” Her eyes filled with burning tears. “That’s been my biggest problem.”

“But—”

She pressed the backs of her fingers over his mouth. “I’m afraid of myself,” she whispered. “Of being so desperate I’d do anything to try to get my guy... Of giving up everything I have or want to keep him no matter what…” Her parent’s choices and actions had scared her. She didn’t want to be as extreme as they’d seemed.

“Sugar.” He gripped her hand, briefly kissed it, before lowering it and pressing her palm against his chest. “You’re not going to lose yourself in loving me. You can be yourself with me more than you can with anyone else in the world. Because it’s you that I love.”

For a long moment she stared hard into his eyes—like he was the cube conundrum. And as he smiled at her, the pieces slowly clicked over, the colors lined up and locked into place.

She smiled too. “You love it when I talk tough?” That was her armor, and they both knew it.

“Adore it.” His mouth quirked, his grin going wicked.

“I think my views got a little warped…” she said, determined to match his honesty. His courage. “I talked to Dad yesterday. He said he was using his ‘love’ for Mom as an excuse to hide his gambling. That he hurt her for years. And he hurt me too. That he lied to both of us.” It still made her shrivel a little on the inside, but Connor sensed it, squeezing her hand in support. She tried to relax. “He doesn’t blame Rex. Or you. He’s owning his addictions.”

Connor nodded, but frowned. “I’ve told Rex to stop with the speaker circuit.”

“You have?”

“I told him he was dragging the great Summerhill brand down.”

“How’d he take that?”

“As well as expected. But I don’t give a damn.”

“Did you tell him about Jack?”

He nodded. “I don’t know what’s going to happen there but I don’t think Jack’s gonna back down. So he’ll meet Rex sometime. Jack says he doesn’t want anything but to get to know us so I’ve invited him to stay at Summerhill as long as he wants to. And to meet Logan, Xander and the guys. I also told him he’d be getting whatever else he was entitled to. Including shares or money or something.”

“That’s… good.”

“I’m not paying him off. It’s only what’s fair.” He looked to her, questioning. “Give and take? Compromise?”

“Yeah.” She got that.

He sighed. “I apologized to Cynthia as well. You were right about my… paying people off. It wasn’t how I meant it though.”

“I know. And I didn’t mean to come across so, judgmental.” Or seem so unforgiving.

“This thing between us?” he said, leaning that smidge closer. “Unstoppable. Unbreakable. We belong together. We’re better together. But you tried to hold part of yourself back for so long… Don’t be afraid. We get out what we put in, right? If we put in everything, we get everything back.” He reached out with his other hand and traced a gentle line down her jaw. “You don’t want to give everything up, I get that. But I’d give it all up for you, Savannah.”

“No,” she whispered.

“Working this out between us, is more important to me than anything. You’re it. You’re everything. I’ll do whatever it takes.”

“I’d never ask you to leave your mountain.”

“Why not?”

“Because you love it. And I…”

“You what?”

“Want to see if this could work…” Still a little lame. But truthful. She’d missed him. So much.

“Luca is desperate for me to bring you home.” He chuckled. “Krista too. But,” he drew in a deep breath. “I know you might not want to come back to Summerhill. You said you’re not so fond of snow, right?” He sent her a sideways look. “So I’ll go where ever you want to.”

She smiled, remembering her tart, untrue put-downs of that gorgeous town.

“Well,” she pondered thoughtfully. “Summerhill is beautiful.”

“It is,” he agreed cautiously.