Beyond What is Given(77)

But it had been my fault. I knew he was too drunk to drive. I hadn’t taken the keys. “What am I going to do? No matter what I choose, someone gets hurt.”

“You’re going to let some of this blame go, Gray. You’re going to spend this weekend with Grace, and you’re going to go home to Sam. And then you’re going to figure out what you want your life to look like now that Grace is in it again. Oh, and you’re going to come home with me while Grace is sleeping. I need your help rearranging some furniture.”

I knew she made that up to distract me, get me out of the hospital for long enough to clear my head. “Furniture, huh?”

She gave me a mock-innocent face. “I pay in brownies.”

“Deal.”



“Thank you for this,” Grace whispered, her head resting on my shoulder as we looked out over the ocean from the front seat of my Mustang. If you’d asked me about five-and-a-half years ago where I’d see myself now…well, this was it.

“You get five more minutes before we have to head back. They’ll notice you’re missing and send the cavalry to find you.”

She wound her fingers through mine. “And you have a plane to catch.”

“Yes.” I looked down to our intertwined fingers. What was once effortless felt a fraction off, like a puzzle piece that had warped in water.

“Are you happy there? In Alabama?”

My chest tightened, picturing Sam’s smile, the feel of her wrapped around me in the morning because she didn’t understand that it was possible to share the bed without acting as a blanket. “Yes.”

“I’m scared. Five years, Gray. What am I supposed to do with myself? The whole world kept spinning while I was paused.”

I leaned my head to rest on hers, the familiarity too easy to sink into. “You don’t have to be scared, Grace. We’re all still here.”

“But you’re not. They said you came all the time.” She took a breath, and I waited, knowing it took supreme effort to form the sentences. “You kind of put your life on pause, too, but you live eight-hundred miles from here.” She shivered, and I pulled the hospital blanket up higher to cover her shoulders.

“I’m always only a phone call away.”

She nodded. “It’s just…different. Tell me something. Anything. Maybe about flying?”

The waves crashed in front of us as I told her about flight school. I told her about beating out both Carter and Jagger for top of the OML during Primary, and being class leader now. “I’m fighting like hell to graduate at the top of my class. I should get my choice of duty stations, and then I can get Fort Bragg. I’d be close.”

“Is it safe? You know…for you to fly? Do you struggle?”

Of course she would ask that. “I’m safe. My reflexes make up for any extra time it takes me on the gauges. So far I haven’t had a problem.”

“Is it hard?”

“Sometimes. I spend a lot of time studying.” Sam flashed in front of my eyes, straddling me, asking that last 5&9 question before she’d let me touch her. “I have help.”

“And you have…friends there?” She pulled back and looked up at me, her eyes large and so open, honest.

I swallowed. “I have friends.” Sam’s name was on the tip of my tongue. It wasn’t fair for Grace not to know, but maybe her mom was right. She needed to heal. I wouldn’t lie if she outright asked me, but I knew Grace, and if she hadn’t asked, it was because she didn’t want to know.

She nodded and tucked her head back onto my shoulder with a jaw-cracking yawn. “You should probably take me back. Mom will have a cow if she notices I’m gone.”

I took us back to the hospital and lifted her into my arms as I snuck in the back entrance. “When did this happen?” She motioned to my torso as we rode the elevator. “I’m not complaining, but you’re…you’re kind of massive.”

“It started after the first year you were…yeah. When they thought you woke up the first time, I had all this rage, so I channeled it.”

“Did I miss the purple shorts?” She blinked up at me, and the elevator dinged.

It took me a second before I caught on. “I’m not the Incredible Hulk.”

“Hmmm.” She gave me that knowing look, and the last five years faded.

“There you are!” Parker exclaimed after the doors opened on our floor. Her joy at this situation was a ten on the what-the-f*ck scale, like someone had taken my angry-spikey sister and dipped her in Care Bear fluff.

“I wanted to see the water,” Grace said with a smile.

“Of course! Gray, can I see you before you head out?”

“No problem.” I carried Grace to her room and got her settled.

“When will you be back?” she grasped my hand after I pulled the covers around her.

My throat closed. “I’m not sure. I wasn’t planning until October, but I’ll see if I can make it sooner.”

Her face fell. Shit. “Right. Of course. But I can call?” She picked up her iPhone 6 that her dad gave her this morning. “I mean, it’s not all that different from the 3, right?”

A corner of my mouth lifted. “Right. You have my contact in there, so call, text, whatever you need. I’m here for you.”