Beyond What is Given(69)

“You can’t do this. I won’t allow it.”

“I’m not five anymore.”

“You are still my son!” he shouted. “God, Grayson. I love you. Is that so hard to understand? I want you safe, and you’re intent on killing yourself.”

“Is that what you think? That I want to die?”

“Whether or not you want to, you’re going to. If you can’t respect your own limits, how can you respect that helicopter?” He crossed his arms.

The set of his jaw, the flex of his arms as he held himself in check—he was me. I was him. And there was no winning this argument. “We’re going to have to agree to disagree. I’m currently the top pilot in my class, which isn’t exactly a small feat. You can choose to trust me for once in my life, or you cannot. I didn’t tell you for a reason. You will not convince me to hand in my wings before I even get them.”

Battle lines drawn.

In the contest of wills, this was a dead heat. He passed me on his way to the door but clamped down on my shoulder with a firm grasp. “I love you, Gray. Anything I’ve ever done has been because I love you.”

“I know, Dad. I love you, too. Come to graduation. See me fly. I’ll change your mind.”

His lips pressed together, biting back what he wanted to say. “I’ll see you soon, Gray.” He left, and I walked out onto the deck, breathing in the comforting smell of the ocean. It was nearly dark, but I still made out the crashing waves.

This was home, and yet it wasn’t. Sam was right—I was one person at Rucker and one here. She waved to me as she walked up the wooden bridge to the beach that crossed the dunes. I may have been two different versions of myself, but they both belonged to her.

“Everything okay?” she asked, leaning against the railing next to me.

“It is now.” Having her near me settled my soul in a way I wouldn’t examine.

“So, girlfriend?”

“Girlfriend.”

“So we’re labeling this.” She looked away, and I gently tilted her chin up until she met my eyes.

“Did I manage to scare Samantha Fitzgerald?” Her hair was soft as I brushed it off her cheek. She turned into my palm and leaned. It was such a simple gesture, but her trust in me deepened my feelings for her. I wasn’t sure how much deeper I could go before using words I wasn’t sure I was capable of.

“Labels…I just…” She closed her eyes and took a deep breath. “You’re graduating in five months, Grayson. If I use that label—if I start to depend on you and then you go—”

“Sam.” She opened her eyes, and I nearly lost it at the fear I saw there. I wasn’t the only one risking something here. She trusted me. “We’ll figure it out. All of it.” I wasn’t letting her go, she just wasn’t ready to hear that yet.

“It doesn’t scare you?”

“Everything about you scares me, but calling you my girlfriend is the least of it. That doesn’t change what you are to me, or define us except for the convenience of other people.” My thumb ghosted across her lower lip. “You’re my Samantha. I’m your Grayson. That means a hell of a lot more to me than saying you’re my girlfriend like we’re back in high school.”

“But I’m your girlfriend.”

“Would you like my letterman’s jacket as proof?” I kept a straight face. “I can probably run back to my parents’ house and get it.”

“You choose now to start cracking jokes?” Panic crept into her eyes.

“You. Are. My. Girlfriend.” I punctuated each word with a kiss. “My. Samantha.”

“And what about everything here? Everyone…here?” Her voice dropped on that last word. “Please don’t offer me something you can’t give. I can’t go through that again.”

My hand flexed with the need to beat the shit out of the professor that had taken advantage of her, nearly broken her. “Since I left for college, I’ve always left one foot here, straddling both worlds. Tomorrow morning, we’re flying back to Alabama. Everything and everyone is staying here. For the first time, all of me is leaving and going home with you.”

She surged up and brought her mouth to mine. I pulled her against me, savoring the complete perfection of Sam as the first fireworks shot off the pier, lighting the sky with a kaleidoscope of colors.

Then I carried her upstairs so I could see the fireworks explode behind her eyes while I was deep inside her.





Chapter Twenty-One


Sam


“Banana, strawberry, protein powder, and kale.” I handed Grayson his protein-packed smoothie as he walked into the kitchen, sweaty from his morning run. I didn’t dwell on where that sweat was dripping, otherwise I’d follow him into the shower and be late for class…again.

“Mmm,” he hummed against my neck as I tried to pour my coffee into a travel mug. “What if I’d rather have you for breakfast?”

I doctored it with honey and creamer and sealed the cup before turning around. “Oh, no, you will not. You had me for dessert and midnight snack last night. I have my summer final in twenty minutes.” I set my hands to his chest, barely covered by his running tank, and suppressed a groan. I’d had so much sex the last month that I should be unable to walk.