Bennett (On the Line Book 2)(52)

She didn’t love me and she didn’t want to marry me. My drive home was spent in pensive thought about it.

I’d never had trouble attracting women. Kelly had been the first and only one besides Charlotte that I wanted more than a casual thing with. Her death had crushed me for a long time. With Charlotte, I’d started to finally heal. I’d let go of the guilt over how happy I was with her.

But for what? To be Charlotte’s on-call f*ck buddy and baby daddy? I wanted much more than that from her.

I passed the turn onto my street and headed to the ice rink instead. No one was there, so I laced up my skates and took a bucket of pucks and a net out and shot for practice.

There was no giving up on this. With every puck that slid home into the net, I realized I’d just have to be patient. Her mother had set such a shitty example that Charlotte had gravitated to the other extreme. Her rejection of me wasn’t actually personal. She had a wall up against all men.

But after five years of certainty that I’d never love a woman again, there was no wall I wouldn’t scale to get inside the fortress Charlotte had set up around her heart. It was like my goal of getting called up to Chicago—I’d just have to work harder.





Charlotte

James and Brian couldn’t keep their eyes off each other. I could see where James’s transformation from annoying * to decent guy had come from.

Brian was a soft-spoken, dark-haired man with a great smile. He’d complimented the spaghetti I cooked several times, refilled my water glass and shown genuine interest in my answers to every question he asked me. He was truly a nice person from everything I could see.

And James soaked up his attention, returning every smile and kindness. When Brian commented about liking James from the moment he saw him, he’d blushed a bright shade of red and grinned happily.

They seemed to be in love, which I couldn’t even fathom after less than two weeks of knowing each other. It had to be that they were both completely smitten, which wasn’t the same thing as love.

I was smitten with Bennett. All he had to do was look at me and I felt heat and longing for him. I adored his sweet, easygoing personality. He was the first man I’d been with who didn’t make me feel like a moody bitch for my occasional bouts of temper.

And when he held me, the whole world disappeared. When I sank into his strong embrace, I felt a blissful sense of being protected in every way.

Not that I needed it. I could take care of myself. But still, I liked the way it felt to be with a man I knew would protect me not just physically, but emotionally. Even yesterday, when he’d gotten so upset, he’d just been hurt. I understood why, too. I’d texted him asking him to come over after his game tonight so we could talk.

“Any baby names picked out yet?” Brian asked me.

“Not yet.”

“James Holloway has a nice ring to it,” James said with a wink.

I smiled. “Well, I do know his last name will be Morse.”

“Speaking of your hockey hunk, where is he tonight?” James asked.

“He has a game.”

“Oh.” Brian’s eyes widened. “Are you missing it because of this?”

“No, it’s fine. We had kind of a . . . discussion yesterday so I think it’s best that I’m not there.”

“Oh, no,” James said, refilling his and Brian’s wineglasses. “You want to talk about it?”

I traced a finger from my left hand over the pearl ring on my right. “I guess it was mostly me being me.”

“How so?”

“He mentioned getting married.” I sighed softly. “It scared me. I don’t know where it came from. Why can’t we just be what we want to each other?”

“Maybe that is what he wants,” James said, sipping from his wineglass.

“What, because society says you shouldn’t have babies out of wedlock?”

“Is that what he said?”

I shook my head and looked down at my plate. “Actually, he said he loves me.”

There was a pause before James spoke again. “And you said . . . ?”

I gave him an aggravated glance. “I don’t remember exactly what I said.”

James made a face. “Then it definitely wasn’t ‘I love you, too.’”

“I don’t even know what love is. I was raised by a woman who thought love was any man who’d have her.”

“You’re much smarter than she is.”

“I’m crazy about him, don’t get me wrong.”

James arched his brows in agreement. “As well you should be. He’s like a mythical creature. Hot, sexy, and sweet. That’s a tough combo to achieve.”

“Not hard for you,” Brian murmured. He leaned over and kissed James softly.

“You two are adorable,” I said, smiling. “I guess what I’m saying is I don’t want to rush things. I love things between Bennett and me. We’re happy. We need to enjoy this.”

“Did you tell him that?”

“No. But I guess I need to.” I stood and started collecting dishes from the table.

“You sit down,” Brian said. “We’ve got the cleanup. It’s the least we can do after you made us such a great dinner.”