Becoming Calder (A Sign of Love Novel)(73)

Xander huffed out a breath. "No, Calder. You need to stay far away from Eden. Don't even look in her direction—"
"I know. I will. Just one time. Please. It will get us both through the next few months. I promise."
Xander looked down, clearly not happy with my request. "Fine. We'll do one practice run of her sneaking out of her room and meeting us by the spring."
I nodded. "Thank you. Only I want to meet her there alone."
"Yeah, I kinda figured I wasn't invited."
I smiled. "Thank you."
Xander nodded. "Thank me when we're walking out of here."
"I will. We need to meet again. I have some other things I want to talk to you about. But I need to get to the fields now before I'm missed and Hector forces me to sleep on jagged metal tonight."
Xander flinched and nodded. "We'll sit by each other like usual at breakfast in the morning and come up with a meeting place."
I nodded, smiled, and started to walk away toward the fields once again. Xander softly made the nighthawk sound behind me and I laughed softly, shaking my head.
Xander had been my friend for so long. I couldn't imagine life without him. Our plan had to work; we had to get out of here. The pain in my legs was nothing compared to that of my heart when I considered being separated from Eden for more than a few months. Our plan had to work, it had to.




CHAPTER SEVENTEEN


Eden



I sat on my bed, Hector's Holy Book in my hands, not reading, but playing a game where I asked a question about the future and then opened it to a random place and used my finger to blindly point to a word, wherein I opened my eyes and used the word to discern the answer.
It was a game I'd played with one question or another since I was young. It was immature, I knew, but I was bored.
"Will Calder and I live happily ever after?" I whispered.
I opened the book and closed my eyes and used my finger to settle on a place on the page. I opened my eyes. The word sitting directly above my finger was "perchance."
"Perchance?" I grumbled aloud. "Really?" I huffed out a breath. "Best choice out of three," I murmured, beginning to open the book to a random spot once again.
A knock at my door startled me and I sat back against my pillow and brought the book up as if I'd been studying it. "Come in," I called.
Mother Miriam opened the door holding something white and gauzy in her hands. She set it down on the end of my bed. "Your bridal veil," she said, the same disdain in her voice that had been present all my life.
"Oh." I said, my heart sinking. "Well, thank you."
Mother Miriam nodded. "The girl who brought it, that simple one, wanted me to tell you the lace on the bottom might seem heavy, but it's only because extra stones were used in the adornment. She repeated herself six or seven times. I suppose she's worried you'll complain," she said, rolling her eyes and shaking her head as if she'd endured some torturous event in having to have a conversation with her at all. I cringed slightly. I'd give anything to talk to Maya for just a few moments, to know the girl whom Calder loved so fiercely.
"Thank you," I said simply, moving down the bed and toying with the delicate material.
Mother Miriam regarded me for a second and then turned to leave.
"Why do you hate me so much?" I asked matter-of-factly, still staring down at my veil.
Mother Miriam turned around to face me again, little expression on her face. "I beg your pardon?"
I looked down at my fingers on the white gauze and then back up at her, holding eye contact. "It's just . . . I've never done a thing to you. I tried so hard to make you proud by being the best piano player I could be. I tried to be polite and obedient. I . . . tried to make you love me. And you never showed me a moment of tenderness, not one. Why? What did I do to you to make you look at me with such hatred?"
Mother Miriam was silent for a second, seeming to decide whether to answer me or not. Finally, her eyes seemed to dim. "You took him away from me," she said simply.
I furrowed my brows, hurt filling me even though I wished I could have shrugged off being hurt by Mother Miriam long ago.
"I was just a little girl," I said.
She looked me up and down. "You're not any longer, though, are you?"
Then she turned and walked out of my room, shutting the door quietly behind her.
I sat there for a minute, staring at the place where she'd just stood, wondering at the unfairness of life and of love. And wondering if the gods were real, why didn't they intervene in situations like this, where I loved Calder, and Miriam loved Hector? Maybe if they interfered just a little bit, we could all have the love we wanted.