Amour Amour (Aerial Ethereal #1)(85)

It has to be worth it to me. It’s what’ll pay my bills without headache, he believes.

I answer it anyway. “This was worth more.”

I want them to see how much it took out of me to stay here. To be alone in a city with no familiar face. But their viewpoint is Shay’s. To them, this is nothing more than foolish. A dumb move in the game of life. I went off the board, left the right path. And decided to take one that never existed in the first place.

When my father looks at me, it’s as if he’s laying eyes on a stranger. “So you’re dancing at that club?” The disgust in his voice caves my chest. My mom still cries. Unable to produce words, she fists a crumpled tissue.

“I’m an aerialist at Phantom,” I choke out, tears falling as I blink. I don’t mention the turn of events after tonight. It’s not the right time to bring it up—and I may…I may find a way out of it. Then I’ll tell them. “And I’m…training with someone from Aerial Ethereal. I’m going to audition in January. I don’t know if Shay told you about that.”

“Your boyfriend is training you,” my dad snaps. “That older Russian man.” The way he says man, it sounds vile.

“He’s twenty-six,” I mutter, feeling sick all of a sudden. Nausea churning.

“That’s okay, honey,” my mom sniffs loudly. She shoots a look at my dad. She’s defending me? I rub my watery eyes, my hand slick with tears. Why does her support hurt too? I don’t understand…a larger pain just bears on my chest.

My dad shifts in his seat.

“We’re not here to discuss your relationship,” she says softly. “That’s your business. You’re old enough to make those choices. We just wished we were informed about the other part…” She sniffs harder, a croak in her voice. “After all we’ve…” Her lips vibrate now.

“I’m sorry,” I cry out, reaching across the table for her hand. She lets me hold it. “I’m really sorry, Mom.”

“I am too,” she replies. “For making you feel like we would’ve swayed your decisions…” She shakes her head. “You’re an adult, Thora. You can do whatever you want. We just want you to be safe and to help you choose right.”

To help me choose right. But what happens if their choices don’t align with mine? Moving against them is worse than moving against the grain. It’s like trying to stop a wave from breaking.

My brick-walled father is not as eager to forgive and forget. “You’re still working at this club?”

“I can’t go home—”

“Yes you can,” he says. “Stop this.”

I shake my head.

“If you go back now, you’ll only be a semester behind.”

“No, I have auditions…” I trail off as his jaw hardens, his eyes shooting caustic bullets into me.

“Paul,” my mom says in defense. “She’s twenty-one—”

“She’s still our daughter. This is so…” stupid, he’s going to say. I’m being stupid. For being here. Taking this risk.

My gaze falls off them, agony coursing through again. This isn’t going to have a good end. No bygones be bygones. The realization slashes my insides, cutting me to pieces. I look to the bar, but Katya isn’t alone anymore.

Luka sits beside her, taking furtive glances in my direction. I check the Elvis clock hung beneath a neon sign. It’s too early for Amour to be finished. Nikolai is still at work.

“Thora,” my dad says, drawing my attention. “We’ll compromise. You come back to Ohio with us, reenroll in college, and when auditions come around, we’ll pay for your ticket to Vegas.”

It’s safe. Smart, even. “I…” I freeze.

He adds, “You shouldn’t be working at that club either.”

“It’s…temporary.” My swollen throat can barely release the words.

“And what were you planning on doing if the auditions didn’t work in your favor?” he asks. “How temporary would it be then?”

He’s slicing me at the knees.

My mom says, “We’ll give you the night to think about it. Our flight leaves at noon tomorrow.”

My dad can’t just leave it there. He’s silently fuming, fixated on what he saw tonight. He leans forward. “I don’t care if your mom wants to talk to you, but as long as you have that job, I don’t want to hear from you, Thora.” He stands up like he banged a gavel on a podium, throwing an ultimatum at my face.

I can’t move. I can’t even blink, haunted by his voice.

My mom pats my hand, my dad hurried to leave. He waits for her to scoot from the booth, and when they depart, everything slams into me. Doubts. Worries. So many fears.

I rest my elbows on the table, crying into my palms. How can this be worth it anymore? What if their offer is the right path and I’m being stupid by staying here? In Vegas.

A sob rips my chest open. And that’s when I feel the seat undulate, someone scooting next to me. I lower one hand and see Katya, her cheeks splotched red like she’s been crying.

I turn my head, and I see Luka across from me, his gaze just as bloodshot. But he smiles weakly, as though reminding me that I have people who care about me in this city—who are here for me. I struggle to return the smile, realizing I can’t form one. An avalanche of tears forces me to shield my eyes again.