All I Believe (Firsts and Forever, #10)(44)
“Yeah, he needed to get home to Catania.”
“Do you think you’ll see him again?”
“Maybe. We’re going to keep in touch. He says he wants to come to the U.S. next year and that he’ll visit me.”
“Do you think it could ever be serious between you two?”
Jessie shook his head. “Giorgio’s a good friend, but that’s about it. He’s one of those guys who can’t imagine why anyone would settle down with just one person. I’m the exact opposite. I don’t see why anyone would want to sleep with a different guy every night of the week.”
“You got all that, even with your language barrier?”
“Yeah.” As I stood up and stretched, Jessie asked, “Are you going to miss Viladembursa?”
I nodded. “I know I’ll be back, I just don’t know when.”
“I’m going to miss it, too. Being here felt good.” He got up too and we both took a last look at the fountain before turning and heading to the hotel. “Well, onward and upward to the next adventure. I’m excited about seeing Rome. Will you be my tour guide if Nana ends up distracted by Olivio?”
“Absolutely.”
We went into the hotel, and when we reached our suite Jessie asked, “Would it be okay if I spent the night in your room with you? Obviously I mean that in a totally platonic practically-your-brother sense. I could just really use some company tonight.” When I agreed, he hurried to change into a pair of pajamas and brush his teeth.
I was under the covers in shorts and a t-shirt when he joined me. He shut off the light and slid in bed beside me, then said, “Thanks for letting me bunk with you.”
“I was feeling a little lost tonight,” I admitted, “so I’m glad you’re here.”
“I feel the same way. I guess maybe I’m a little disappointed that things didn’t work out differently with Giorgio. I was so excited when we first met. I thought I’d finally found a guy who was as into me as I was into him. But it seems like that’s never the case.”
“You’re such a great guy, Jess. Sooner or later, you’re going to find someone who truly appreciates you.”
“Maybe, maybe not. I think I smother the guys I date. I want to be in a relationship so desperately that I try way too hard and rush things and just generally completely fail to play it cool. It scares ‘em off quicker than anything. I’m starting to doubt I’ll ever find a guy who’ll put up with that shit,” he said.
“The right guy won’t care about any of that.”
“I hope so.”
We were both quiet for a while, and I tucked my hands behind my head and stared toward the ceiling (not at it, since I’d taken my glasses off and couldn’t see that far). Then Jessie asked out of the blue, “You’re totally crazy about Luca, aren’t you?”
“God yes, even though that scares the hell out of me. You know I was only looking for a summer fling, and even that was going to be a stretch after the way my last relationship ended. I’m supposed to be keeping this casual, not thinking about him every waking moment. We only went out a few times, he’s not supposed to matter this much to me!”
“I guess it’s not really the kind of thing you can control. I get why it happened, too. There’s this crazy connection between the two of you, anyone can see it. The fact that you were drawn together twice is proof of that. You two are meant to be. It’s like the entire universe aligned to make sure you found each other again.”
I rolled onto my side and smiled at Jessie in the darkness. “That’s an incredibly romantic notion.”
“What can I say? I’m a true believer in happily ever after.”
“I don’t know what to think about the way he broke our plans and ran off without offering any explanations.”
“Do you believe Luca cares about you?” I didn’t have to think about it. I just nodded. Jessie said, “So, I guess all you can do is trust him. It sounds like some things are going on in his life that are beyond his control, and maybe he has a really good reason for not telling you what’s going on.” I sighed quietly and nodded.
*****
Rome was a shock to the system after the slow pace of Viladembursa. I loved big cities and normally thrived on their energy, but this time it felt a bit jarring. Despite that, I made an effort to look past the noise, crowds and traffic and tried to appreciate all that made Rome truly great. The city was vibrant and unique, the ancient and the modern sharply juxtaposed, and there was so much to love about it. I just had to get in the right mindset.
I tried to take a note from Jessie’s playbook and let his enthusiasm rub off on me. Each day, I played tour guide, showing my friend all the major attractions and a few lesser known gems. He was delighted with them all.
Nana and Ollie (and Diego Rivera, the Chihuahua) accompanied us some of the time, but also went off to do things as a couple, including romantic dinners, trips to the theater, and a tremendous amount of shopping. He showered her with gifts, and she did the same for him. Olivio Caravetti hadn’t been involved with anyone since his wife passed almost a decade earlier, and after her husband left her for a woman half his age, Nana wasn’t going to give her heart to just anyone. But they were both willing to try, and that was a beautiful thing.