A Thousand Boy Kisses(30)

Laughing, I shook my head. “It’s alright, Jor. I knew you didn’t mean it. You’d never hurt me.”

Jorie dropped her hands from her mouth, her head tipped to the side. “Seriously though, Pops. What do you think of Rune? You know, since he’s been back?”

Jorie was watching me curiously. I shrugged. Jorie rolled her eyes. “You’re telling me you have no opinion about how the great love of your life looks, now he’s older and, in my opinion, beyond smokin’ hot!”

My stomach churned and I played with the plastic Solo cup in my hands. Shrugging, I replied, “He’s just as handsome as he ever was.”

Jorie smirked behind her cup as she took a drink, then she grimaced when we heard the voice of Avery drifting out from inside the house. Jorie lowered her cup. “Ugh, looks like the whore’s in the house.”

I smiled at the level of disgust on Jorie’s face. “Is she really that bad?” I asked. “Is she actually a whore?”

Jorie sighed. “Not really, I just hate how she flirts with all the guys.”

Ah, I thought, knowing exactly who she was referring to. “Anyone in particular?” I teased, and watched Jorie scowl in response. “Judson, perhaps?” I added, prompting Jorie to throw her empty cup my way.

I laughed as it flew past me in completely the wrong direction. When my laughter had died down, Jorie said, “At least now Rune’s back she seems to have backed off Jud, anyway.” My good humor evaporated. When Jorie realized what she’d just said, she groaned in exasperation at herself, and moved quickly to sit beside me and take hold of my hand. “Crap, Pops. I’m so sorry. I did it again! I didn’t mean—”

“It’s okay,” I interrupted.

But Jorie tightened her grip on my hand. Moments of silence passed by. “Do you regret it, Pops? Do you ever regret cutting him off like that?”

I stared at the fire, lost in the roaring flames, and answered honestly, “Every single day.”

“Poppy,” Jorie whispered sadly.

I threw her a weak smile. “I miss him, Jor. You have no idea how much. But I couldn’t tell him what was happening. I couldn’t do that to him. Better he believed that I was no longer interested, than to tell him the ugly truth.” Jorie laid her head on my shoulder. I sighed. “If he had known, he would have tried everything in his power to come back. But that wouldn’t have been possible. His daddy’s job was there in Oslo. And I …” I sucked in a breath. “And I wanted him to be happy. I knew that, in time, he’d get past not hearing from me. But I know Rune, Jor; he would never have gotten past the alternative.”

Jorie lifted her head and kissed my cheek, which made me laugh. But I could still see the sadness on Jorie’s face as she asked, “And now? Now he’s back, what will you do? Eventually, everyone else will find out.”

Inhaling deeply, I replied, “I’m hoping they won’t, Jor. I’m not popular at school like you, Ruby and Rune. If I simply disappear again, no one will notice.” I shook my head. “And I doubt the Rune who came home would care anymore. I saw him in the hallway again yesterday, and the look he gave me showed me how he feels. I’m nothing to him now.”

An awkward silence followed until my best friend ventured, “But you love him just as much. Am I right?”

I didn’t reply. But my lack of response was as loud as a scream.

I did. I still loved him, the same as always.

A loud crash came from the front yard, shattering the intensity of our conversation. I realized a couple of hours must have passed since we arrived. Jorie got to her feet and grimaced. “Pops, I need to pee! Come inside?”

I laughed at Jorie dancing on the spot and followed her inside. Jorie pushed her way through to the bathroom at the back of the house. I waited for her in the hallway, until I heard Ruby and Deacon’s voices drifting from the den.

Deciding to go and sit with them while I waited for Jorie, I opened the door and stepped inside. I was barely three steps in when I regretted ever coming to this party. Three couches dominated the small room. Ruby and Deacon occupied one, Judson and some of the football team sprawled over another. But it was the third couch I couldn’t tear my eyes off. No matter how much I commanded my feet to move, they refused.

Avery was sitting on the couch, drinking from her cup. An arm was around her shoulders. Avery was tracing patterns on the hand that was hanging over her chest.

I knew what that hand felt like.

I knew how it felt to be under the protective shelter of that arm.

And I felt my heart shatter as I moved my eyes to the boy who sat by her side. As if feeling the heavy weight of my stare, he looked up. His hand stopped, drink halfway to his mouth.

Tears filled my eyes.

Understanding Rune would have moved on from me was hard enough to bear; seeing him like this brought another level of pain that I never ever thought was possible.

“Poppy? Are you okay?” Ruby’s concerned voice suddenly rang across the room, forcing me to break away from the car crash I was witnessing.

Forcing a smile toward Ruby, I whispered, “Yes. I’m fine.”

Feeling my legs shake from the unwanted attention of everyone in the room, I managed to step away toward the door. But as I did, I saw Avery turn in toward Rune.

Turn in for a kiss.