ALL THE RAGE (writer: T.M. Frazier)(73)

“Just do it,” I said. Feeling myself retreating into the numbness that I’d experienced with Cody, but as much as I wanted to zone out completely, I couldn’t get there.

“Put her on top of you so I can see better,” Cody demanded, his voice hoarse.

Smoke grunted and lifted me up by my waist. He turned so that he was sitting at the edge of the table and I was straddling him. “I’m so sorry,” he said again as he spit into his hand and rubbed it onto the tip of his dick. He grabbed the base of his shaft and lowered me onto him, quietly groaning under his breath as he pushed up into me.

That’s when I made the biggest mistake of my entire life.

I opened my eyes. There, over Smoke’s shoulder, I found myself in the last place I wanted to be, locked in Nolan’s gaze.

“Fuck her, God dammit!” Cody roared, firing his gun into the air.

Smoke pushed up into me roughly. I wasn’t remotely ready. It hurt. It hurt so much. “Just think of all the ways we’re gonna kill him when it’s all over,” Smoke whispered to me as he moved me up and down on top of him.

The entire time, I was unable to look away from Nolan, who even with one eye swollen shut, with the most vengeful look on his reddened face, was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen.

That moment changed my life forever.

It was the moment I stopped being able to go numb when I needed to retreat. It was the moment I realized that what I’d been feeling for Nolan was love.

Smoke grunted one last apology, lifting me off of him and coming onto his own stomach. A tear dripped from the corner of Nolan’s eye.

I may have loved Nolan, but in that moment I hated myself.

It was also when the bullets started flying, followed by an explosion.

Nolan

Sick. I was going to be f*cking sick. I didn’t want to watch but I couldn’t tear my eyes away. I tried to scream through the gag in my mouth, but it muffled the sound. There was nothing I could do but watch as some other guy f*cked MY girl.

I was being untied. By who I didn’t care. I didn’t even register the voices whispering to me or who it was who put the gun in my hands. Cody may have knocked the shit out of me, but it was nothing compared to what he’d done to that girl in my living room, gutting her like she was a f*cking slab of beef.

The second I was free, I stood up, ignoring the spinning sensation in my head. I started pulling the trigger. Over and over and over again, I walked toward Cody, blasting one bullet after the other into him until he was a pile of hole-filled dead flesh in the dirt.

The explosion happened fast and quick. When I turned around I saw a poof of smoke coming from the trees. Joker and a couple of my other brothers walked out from where the explosion had just happened. “All taken care of,” Joker said. “Looks like you got things handled over here.” He pointed to Cody’s body, but I didn’t answer him. Instead, I turned toward where the guy who’d just f*cked my girl was buttoning up his pants. I aimed my gun at him and fired, forgetting I’d just used all my bullets on Cody.

“Kind of wish you had bullets left in there,” he said. I lowered the gun and ran over to Rage, scooping her up in my arms. “That’s Smoke. It wasn’t his fault,” Rage said, not sounding at all like herself. She was meek and quiet.

I f*cking hated it.

“You might want to get the f*ck out of here before I can reload,” I warned Smoke, who with a nod to me and a sad smile to Rage, turned and disappeared.

“I…I…” Rage stammered, but there was nothing she had to say.

“You don’t need to say shit right now. You’re alive. I’m alive. That’s all that f*cking matters.” Rage looked at me like she was going to respond, but her eyes rolled back in her head and she passed out cold in my arms.

“I got cleanup,” Joker said, pulling out his phone. He pointed to Rage. “The little arsonist gonna okay?”

“You know who she is?” I asked. “ ’Cause if you don’t think I’m going to walk out of here with her then—”

“Shut the f*ck up, son,” Joker interrupted. “That guy you just threatened? Smoke? He paid off her debt to me a long time ago. Girl’s not on my hit list. Not right now anyway. Smoke explained to me about the two of you briefly on the voicemail he left me when he asked us to come here. Van’s parked in the lot, keys inside. Now go on, get her out of here and take care of her. Come to the clubhouse when you can. We’ll talk more then.”

I didn’t need to be told twice. I scooped Rage up into my arms and left the park where both of us had lost a piece of ourselves and wondered after all that had happened if those were pieces we could ever get back.





CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR




Rage


I woke up in a familiar room. But it wasn’t the familiar room I wanted to wake up in. This one was decorated in pinks and teals. Designed for the daughter my mother wanted, not the one she had.

“Mijn Zoeteken, I am so happy you’re awake,” my mom said, crossing the room and sitting on the edge of the bed. My father followed, sitting on the other side. “Nolan brought you home and said you were injured, and we’ve been in such distress. He’s such a good boy, you know. I’m glad you found each other. How’s your leg feeling? You shouldn’t go down slopes you aren’t trained for. Nolan was right, you’ve always been a dare devil, but it’s best you stick to the bunny slopes on your first try.”