You Were Mine (Rosemary Beach #9)(40)

Bethy’s mouth puckered up as she sucked in a sob. I would take this all from her and live with it if I could. “Tonight,” she said as another sob broke free. “Tonight with you . . . I didn’t even think about him.” As if realizing it herself as she admitted it, she pulled her hands free of mine and stood up abruptly, putting distance between us.

“That’s part of living. Enjoying life. You’ve just been existing,” I told her, hoping she got this. Accepted it.

She sniffed and wiped at her face. “I just . . . I can’t.” She stopped and took a deep breath, then turned to look at me. “I can’t live life . . . with you. I just can’t.”

I stood up, but she shook her head and turned to go inside. “I love you.” The words came out before I could stop them. Those were words I had wanted to say to her again for the past eight years.

She grabbed the side of the door tightly but didn’t look back at me. We stood there in silence for several moments while I held on to the one small thread of hope that this would keep her in my life. “I’m sorry, but it’s too late.”

She walked inside, and the walls around her hut closed.

This was it. I needed to walk away and let her find the life she wanted. I would never be a part of that life. But how could I accept that? I wanted a future with Bethy. I wanted to be the one to make her smile. How much more could I push her? Finding a way to let her move on and heal without me felt like ripping my heart out and leaving it lying there at her feet. She wanted to heal. She just didn’t want to do it with me.

Bethy

I set down my tray of drinks and took several deep breaths. It had been three months since I’d successfully pushed Tripp out of my life. When we had returned from the island after the wedding, Tripp no longer followed me to work and back. Unless he was with the guys playing golf, I rarely got a glimpse of him.

“You good, chica?” Jimmy, the head server at the club’s dining room, asked as he strolled through the double doors.

I managed a nod and plastered on a smile. “Yeah, great,” I replied.

“Good, because the board members are all here. We got our hands full tonight, and good ol’ Aunt Darla’s out there to make sure we don’t mess up.”

I had already seen the reserved table and the guests sitting at it. That was the main reason I needed a moment to get myself together. Waiting on my friends was normally something I enjoyed doing, because both Della and Blaire had worked here once, too. They were easy to wait on. Most of the time, they got up and fixed their own drinks and got their own plates from the kitchen.

But this was different. They were all dressed up. This was a business dinner, which Woods held every quarter. Once I had gone to those gatherings with Jace, although being on the outside wasn’t really that hard for me.

Seeing Tripp with a date was what threw me for a loop. Not that I even had a right to care.

“Waters are on the table. Woods has already chosen a red and a white for dinner. You take the red, and I’ll take the white. I also expect Dean Finlay will order bourbon. Everyone else normally sticks with the wine.”

I nodded my head again, still trying to figure out why I was so upset over Tripp bringing a date. I had pushed him away, and it had worked. Maybe too well. He was with London Winchester tonight. They had dated in high school for two years. When we were together, he didn’t seem to like her at all. She annoyed him.

But she didn’t look like a runway model back then, either. She had to be close to six feet tall, and most of that was legs. Ugh.

“Girl, you sure you’re OK? You look pale.” Jimmy stopped in front of me and put his finger under my chin to tilt it up so he could see me. There were a lot of beautiful men in this town, but Jimmy quite possibly had them all beat. He was startlingly attractive. The cougars tipped him well and tried their hardest to get him into bed.

Jimmy, however, had a boyfriend. A very hot boyfriend named Ben. It was kept on the down-low, because if the cougars knew Jimmy had no interest in the female gender, then his tips wouldn’t be as good. He was an excellent flirt.

“Long day, and waiting on a table where my aunt Darla is sitting doesn’t sound like a good way to end it.”

Jimmy rolled his eyes. “That woman loves you. Don’t be so mean.”

Aunt Darla did love me, but she was also hard to please. She ran a tight ship around here. It was one reason she was on the board of directors for the club. Woods knew he needed her. “I know,” I replied, and took the bottle of red wine from Jimmy’s outstretched hand.

“Get out there.” He nudged me, and I put on a smile and headed to the private area of the dining room where the board of directors sat.

A table full of my friends and my aunt shouldn’t be so hard to deal with. I should be happy to end my night like this. The tip Woods would leave would pay my rent this month and then some. I should be thankful.

London turned her catlike eyes my way and looked right through me. She wouldn’t know who I was, and for that I was thankful. I hadn’t kept up with London since that summer with Tripp, so I had no idea what she was doing now. She very likely could be modeling.

“Bethy!” Blaire’s excited voice called out. I shifted my gaze from London to her. She was beaming at me as if I hadn’t just spent the day with her two days ago. After the wedding, I had done my best to live my life in a way I hadn’t in years. Tripp had been right about that. Jace didn’t sacrifice his life so that I wouldn’t live mine. I had to live for both of us. I was doing my best.