The Season(52)

“Why did you think he was courting Penelope?” Alex cut straight to the point.

“No reason, really, except that at most gatherings we’ve all attended, Penelope has been…in rather close proximity to him.” Seeing the disappointment on Alex’s face, she added quickly, “But it’s probably me imagining things. I do that, remember?”

Vivi jumped in quickly to agree, “Yes. You do. It is far more likely that Penelope has been close to him because she’s like a creeping ivy—lovely, but damaging. Blackmoor kissed you, Alex, which clearly means that you’re the person in whom he is interested. He wouldn’t have done it if he were angling for Penelope Grayson. I’m certain he’s of better stock than that.”

“With the exception of his recent behavior toward you,” Ella added.

“Ella!” Vivi’s tone was amazed. “It would do you well to stop speaking until you have something helpful to say. There are times when your inability to distinguish between what is appropriate and inappropriate astounds me.”

“Well, that would make his ignoring the whole event more understandable,” Alex said with more calm than she felt. “After all, he had a particularly difficult evening and was most certainly on edge. He’s always felt comfortable with me, so perhaps the kiss just…happened.”

“Alex”—Vivi was matter-of-fact—“kisses don’t just happen.”

“We don’t know that. We’ve never been kissed.”

“I think that’s exactly her point, Alex,” Ella offered.

Alex shook her head. “But how could we even speculate on this? We’ve only been out for two months!”

“We can speculate on this because we know that if we were caught kissing, we’d be forced into marriage,” Ella replied, “and, since most people we know have not been forced into marriage, we can assume they don’t go around kissing everyone in the vicinity.” She offered Vivi a smug look. “You see? I can be helpful.”

“Oh, please,” Alex pressed on. “I’ve been kissed once and almost kissed once in the span of three weeks, and I haven’t been caught. It can’t be that out of the ordinary. Maybe he’s kissing Penelope, too.”

“Ugh.” Ella could not hide her disgust at this idea. “I do not want that picture in my head.”

“You’re the one who sent her down this path!” Vivi stood, Eliza having finished arranging her hair in long, gorgeous dark curls. “You deserve to be disgusted. I have no sympathy for you.” Turning to Alex as Ella slid onto the bench in front of the dressing table for her turn, Vivi said earnestly, “I don’t know much about kissing or about courting, Alex, but I do know that Blackmoor has always adored you. Always.”

“Then why is he ignoring me? Why hasn’t he mentioned it? Why hasn’t he tried to kiss me again?” She gasped, covering her mouth. “What if I was terrible at it?”

“You weren’t,” Vivi said.

“Certainly not,” Ella agreed.

“Oh, how do you know?” Alex said, now enveloped in self-doubt. “Maybe I did it all wrong!”

“This might be a good time to discuss the kiss in question,” Ella offered. “What was it like?”

“I thought it was wonderful! I wanted to do it again, immediately! But what if it was awful and I just didn’t know it?!”

“That simply cannot be the case!” Vivi shook her head in earnest.

“Indeed,” Eliza broke her silence, “if it made you want to do it again, and soon, ’twas a good kiss.”

“For me…but what about for him?”

“He had to have enjoyed it, Alex,” Ella said.

Alex’s frantic frustration bubbled over. “Then why isn’t he interested in me? Why doesn’t he want to do it again? Maybe he does want Penelope!” Her voice became small. “Why doesn’t he want me?”

“Alex,” Ella asked curiously, “are you saying…Do you want him?”

Alex thought carefully about Ella’s question. Did she want Gavin? “Well…the kiss was quite lovely.”

“Of course, it was,” Vivi said, “but…what about the man himself? Could you love him?”

Love? Gavin? She looked at the other three girls, each staring back at her as though she were about to reveal some history-altering secret. It was too much to think about, really. “I…I don’t know. I’ve always thought of him as a brother. But recently…everything has changed. He kissed me and I wanted him to and it…everything feels different. But I don’t know what to think. Maybe nothing is different to him. Maybe it didn’t mean anything to him.”

Vivi walked over to Alex, then took her shoulders in hand and spoke with firm conviction, “I may not know much about this kissing business, Alex, but I do know that Gavin would never do anything to hurt you. Including kissing you if he didn’t mean it at least a little.”

Alex offered Vivi a half smile. “You’re right, but what if that’s the problem? What if he means it only a little?”

Vivi went quiet for a long time before her face brightened in a conspiratorial smile. “Well, then, we’ll just have to make sure he ends up meaning it a great deal.”