The Gamble (Colorado Mountain #1)(180)

“Max –” I whispered, my breath coming fast, almost in pants but he talked over me.

“Then Curt gets murdered while I’m fallin’ for you and this week it’s been like lettin’ her go again but I could deal with that, long’s I had you, your body in my bed, you bein’ so cute all the time, you sparrin’ with me, all that remindin’ me life could be good. And I had your shit to occupy my mind, sort you out, get you to take a gamble on me and you f**kin’ knew and you let me deal with your shit and you didn’t ask that first f**kin’ question. You didn’t think once what I might be goin’ through.”

He was right, so right and I hated when he was right.

Especially this time.

I didn’t think, I even figured it out but I never thought of him. I was so wrapped up in my own drama, my neuroses, I didn’t give it a single thought. Not once, not even when Curt wrote whatever he wrote in his letter to the man whose wife he killed obviously in a car wreck and Max went so strange. Bitsy had even told me to take care of Max but did I?

No. I just thought about me.

I took a step forward but this time Max moved back and I stopped, actually feeling the blood draining from my face.

“Max, darling –”

“Nope, Nina, no way. Don’t give me that f**kin’ ‘darling’ shit now.” He shook his head. “You were so busy worryin’ about yourself, you didn’t think to worry about me. So that shit with Shauna that first night at The Mark, you cuddlin’ up to me, havin’ my back… f*ck.” He ended on a snarl, so overcome with fury and mountain man betrayal he couldn’t go on.

“Max, let me –”

He cut me off again. “You know where I been this morning, babe?”

“I…” I shook my head, “no, I… where have you been?”

“Talkin’ to Bitsy,” he replied, his voice terse. “See yesterday, durin’ our conversation, I realized I was askin’ you to give up everything for me, slot into my life. And I thought, you movin’ all the way out here only to have me be gone, seein’ you on weekends or not for months, you make your sacrifice and what? That’s what you get? So I told Bitsy I’d take the job, I’d take over Curt’s business, I’d stay in town, I’d do that shit for you.”

I felt my chest moving rapidly, the tears welling in my eyes, I couldn’t believe it. Max didn’t want anything to do with that job. He hated Curt’s business. He hated Curt. Curt had killed his wife.

“Please, Max, let me explain.”

He shook his head and started to the door. “Figure this’ll be good, babe, but too f**kin’ late.”

I followed him, calling, “Max.”

He turned to me with his hand on the handle of the door and I stopped at the coldness I saw in his eyes, a coldness I’d only seen once before. Coldness he’d aimed at Shauna.

“Told you, somethin’s good, it’s worth fightin’ for but not if you’re the only one fightin’.”

Then he opened the door, slamming it behind him and stalked out.

My feet were bare so I ran up the stairs, pulled on boots then ran down, threw open the door, jumped down the steps but when I got to the drive I saw his Cherokee disappear behind the green pine and white aspen of his mountain.

Chapter Twelve

Norm and Gladys

It was starting to get dark, I was frozen nearly stiff but I sat watching and listening to the rushing river by my cabin.

After Max left that morning, his parting shot so final, I knew I only had one choice and having only that choice, in my head I broke down the problems facing me then I tackled them one by one.

I called Thrifty’s and luckily got someone other than Arlene who answered the phone. This person had clearly not been informed of the ban on taxis to Max’s house therefore when I ordered a taxi he told me they’d send one and it’d be there in half an hour.

While I waited for the taxi, I made the bed and packed. Then I went downstairs, booted up Max’s computer and changed the password.

Then I wrote a note to Max. I wrote it longhand on a sheet of paper I took from his printer. I didn’t edit it or proofread it, just wrote it and left it on the kitchen counter. There wasn’t much to it anyway.

All it said was:

Max,

You’re right. You deserve better.

Thank you for all you did and for being you.

Nina

PS: Your computer password is Beautifulbluff

Then I got in the taxi and paid a fortune for him to take me to the closest rental car agency which was three towns over. I rented a car asking the clerk where I could book a few nights somewhere quiet, somewhere secluded. He told me he knew just the place, made a call, wrote out the directions, I followed them and I checked into my own little cabin amongst a bunch of other little cabins in a little wood by the river.

Then I texted my Mom to tell her I was all right, not to worry about me, I’d explain later, ignoring the fact that I’d had twelve calls and not even looking to see who they were from. Then I turned the ringer on my phone to silent and put it in the nightstand.

Then I drove to the market I saw on my way to the cabins and bought myself enough food to last a few days, drove it back to my cabin and unpacked it.

I made myself lunch, ate it but didn’t taste it.