Summer Nights (Fool's Gold #8)(59)

Once in her small living room, she motioned for him to take a seat. She settled across from him, in an oversize chair. She knew that good manners dictated that she offer him something to eat or drink, but she couldn’t quite bring herself to say the words. Encouraging Lewis didn’t seem like a good idea.

He studied her for a minute or so, then spoke. “This is what you want?”

She wasn’t sure if he was asking a question. “The divorce? Yes. It’s what I want.”

“Because you’re with Shane.”

With him? Not in the way Lewis meant. “There were unfixable problems in our marriage,” she said instead.

He leaned forward and laced his fingers together. His pale gaze settled on her face. “I miss you, Annabelle.”

“I’m sorry,” she said automatically.

“Are you? Do you think of me at all? Or have you completely moved on?”

Okay, the conversation had officially shifted to awkward. “We’ve been apart longer than we were together,” she began. “I’ve made a life for myself here. I’m happy.”

“I see. What if I said I’d changed? That I was willing to compromise?”

“I think that it’s for the best that we don’t revisit the past,” she said gently.

“You don’t believe me.”

“That you’ve changed?” She shrugged. “I don’t know. I think growing as a person is a good thing. But would it make me want to try again? No. I’m sorry.”

“We were good together,” he insisted. “Don’t you remember?”

What she remembered was never feeling enough for him. That his words could be cruel. “You wanted me to be like a china doll,” she said slowly. “Something to occupy you when you had time. Something to show off.”

“No, that’s not true. I might have been a little demanding, but as I said, I’m different now. I’ve learned how to be more of a partner. There must be things you miss.”

She stood. “Lewis, I appreciate you letting me know about the paperwork on the divorce. It’s final now and we can both move on. It’s for the best.”

He rose. “You’re simply going to walk away? Just like that? Without trying at all?”

It wasn’t in her nature to be cruel. She would go out of her way not to hurt his feelings, but he was starting to bug her. She drew in a breath.

“This entire conversation is an example of why I left,” she said quietly, knowing that getting angry wouldn’t accomplish anything. “I’ve told you what I want, what is important to me, and you aren’t interested. You’re pushing back without consideration for anyone but yourself. When you don’t like what I say, you tell me I’m wrong and then you try to make me feel guilty. I’m not wrong and I won’t take responsibility for how you feel now. We’re divorced. I’m not proud of that, but I accept it. I’ve moved on and you need to do the same.”

She braced herself for the explosion. Lewis didn’t like being told he was at fault and he rarely reacted well when that happened. But instead of getting angry, Lewis seemed to shrink a little.

“I see,” he murmured. “It’s truly over.”

“Yes.”

He stared at her, then turned toward the door. “Goodbye, Annabelle.”

“Goodbye.”

“You’ll regret this, you know. Regret losing me.”

She pressed her lips together and waited until he left.

She walked to the window and watched him drive away. With a little luck, he would leave town and she wouldn’t see him again.

When they’d first met, she had been so sure he would be the one to rescue her. Since then, she’d learned the only person who could take on that job was herself. She had learned the painful lesson in the weeks after she’d left him, when she’d been alone and scared and emotionally broken.

Time and hard work had healed her. Now she was ready for a real relationship between equals. Someone who loved her as much as… She smiled. Someone who adored her with the same devotion as Khatar. Without being a horse.

She wanted that to be Shane. He was smart, funny, sensible and calm. His biggest flaw was comparing her to his ex-wife. She knew she wasn’t anything like her, but she wasn’t the one who needed convincing. Until he saw the difference, she would have to be careful about protecting her heart. Because she was determined not to make a mistake again. This time, when she gave her heart, it was going to be forever.

* * *

“YOU GOTTA STOP,” Shane said, not looking up from the bottle he shook. “I mean it. Get back to where you belong.”

The riding horses he’d reluctantly taken possession of had come with their own tack. All the leather was in decent shape, but old and dirty. He’d decided to take the afternoon and clean everything. Not only to keep it in good working order, but because, well, his students were girls. Not that he would admit that to anyone, even under threat of torture.

So he’d lined up the equipment by the barn, set up a comfortable work station in the shade of one of the big trees and prepared to spend a few hours listening to the Dodgers-Giants game on the radio.

Sometime into his second hour, he’d become aware he wasn’t alone anymore. A small brown nose had poked its way under his arm, much like a dog wanting to be patted. Only it wasn’t a dog. It was the damn pony, Reno.