Rome (Marked Men #3)(71)

He made a face and elbowed me in the side, which caused me to grunt.

“No. The fact that I love Shaw. I never thought I would feel about anyone the way I feel about her, ya know. She is just … my whole f**king world.”

I clapped a hand on his shoulder. “I know. I can see it. I’m superproud of you for figuring it out. I know I was hard on you when I got back and that wasn’t fair. You’re amazing together.”

He gulped and the frost in his eyes thawed just the barest fraction.

“I want her forever.”

“Pretty sure you got her.”

“I want to ask her to marry me.”

I almost fell off my stool. Not because I didn’t think he loved Shaw, or that he would make an awesome husband, but because he was my impulsive, wild, unhinged little brother. Rule was not a guy that I ever thought would settle into the role of responsible homeowner and faithful husband. I just stared at him until he got mad and snapped.

“What?”

“Nothing. I just never thought I would hear you say that. Has she been hinting that she wants you to ask her?”

He shook his head and took a healthy slug of beer. The beer signs were making his typically wild hair even more outrageous with the neon lights shining on the white strands.

“No. She’s perfect. She doesn’t fuss, doesn’t nag, she trusts me absolutely no matter how dumb I act, and she never, ever holds the past against me. Which, come on, it would be really easy for her to do. On top of it, she’s mind-blowing in bed and I can’t keep my hands off of her. She’s too good to be true, so why would she want to spend the rest of her life with me?”

I thought the answer was easy. Shaw had loved Rule forever. For longer than he probably really knew. He was it for her and always had been. I had never seen Rule self-conscious or in doubt like this. It was eye-opening. He really did love that little girl as much as she loved him.

“Just ask her. She’s going to say yes. She loves you. She has always been in love with you and she will always be in love with you. For her, you were too good to be true as well. You’re both lucky to have each other.”

He dropped his head in his hands and sighed. The knuckles of his hand that had Shaw’s name inked across them caught my eye. I pointed to them.

“You have her with you forever already, a ring isn’t going to make that much of a difference, bro.”

“I need to wait until she’s done with school next semester. She needs to graduate and focus on starting med school. I don’t want her worrying about me or a wedding while she does it. Honestly, talking to Lando made me start thinking about it. God forbid something happened to me or to her. I want everyone on the planet to know how much she means to me. How she changed my life and made me want to be a better man for her and her alone.”

I shook my head in the negative when Asa lined up a round of shots on the bar rail and lifted an eyebrow to ask if I wanted one. I was doing pretty well with the no-drinking thing. I had a beer here and there, did a shot with Asa at the end of the night occasionally, but for the most part I was too busy with the actual running of the bar and keeping an eye on the customers to get tempted. Plus having easy access to my pixie and her particular brand of help with my stress management was so much more fun—and a much more healing balm for my soul—that vodka and the inevitable hangover held zero appeal.

“Rule, she’s always been an Archer. Putting a rock on her finger is just a formality. No one doubts how much you care about her, or that you are committed to her and her alone. Screw her obnoxious family and whatever headache Mom and Dad might want to cause, you want her forever, ask her.”

He looked up at me and lifted both of his eyebrows in question. The barbells that decorated them looked like they were winking at me.

“So you don’t think you want to marry Cora? You’re just gonna knock her up and live in sin?” Coming from anyone else, that would’ve pissed me off. Coming from him and hearing the humor underlying his tone, I was able to take it for what it was worth. I shoved him hard, which made him laugh at me.

“I don’t know. Maybe. It’s hard enough trying to make a new relationship work with an unexpected baby on the way.”

“Yeah. How exactly did that happen? You used to shove condoms in my pockets before I snuck out of the house at night. You drilled safe sex into me before I ever even saw a girl topless. It seems pretty against character for you to have an accident of that kind of proportion.”

I crossed my arms on the newly finished bar and leaned on the rail. I looked at my hands, the scars that dotted them.

“Sometimes things are just meant to be. I never thought about having kids, never thought about the kind of girl I would want to settle down with, never thought much beyond the next mission, and then when I got home it was beyond the next endless day. Everything was all shades of gray and I was just disappearing into the fog. I thought I needed direction, needed something to define me. I didn’t. I don’t. I can just be a guy, a guy that messes up, but as long as I’m accountable, that’s okay.”

Rule finished his beer and put his hands on my shoulders so that we were eye to eye.

“You will NEVER just be a guy, Rome. You’re the best brother a guy could have. You’re a f**king hero. No one, and I mean no one, has ever had my back the way you have. You are an incredible person, be it in the army fighting a war or sitting on the goddamn couch watching the game. Don’t forget it.”