Misbehaving (Sea Breeze #6)(66)

I wouldn’t be letting anyone touch me. That wasn’t part of the job description. I also hadn’t been prepared for lap dances. That was up close and personal.

“Don’t be nervous. It’s just us. With that face and body, you’re not gonna have to do much to make them happy. Listen to the music and forget the man. Move to the music and enjoy the way it feels. Do it because dancing feels good, not because someone is watching you. It isn’t about them.”

But it was about them, and I would be doing it in their laps. I was going to hyperventilate.

“Breathe, sweetheart. Don’t panic on me. You can do this,” he said encouragingly.

“I hadn’t realized I had to do . . . I mean, dance so close,” I finally said.

“If you’ve changed your mind I’ll be disappointed, because I think you’ll become a favorite here, but I’ll let you leave. It’s okay if you think this isn’t for you.”

My momma needed me to. I had to make enough money to get us through this. Then I could quit. I could get another job. This wasn’t forever. No one was going to touch me. I just had to forget that they were looking at me naked. I couldn’t focus on that.

“I can do it,” I said, more for myself than for him.

He nodded. “Okay, then. Let’s start with stripping. I need to see what we have under that little bit of fabric you have covering you.”

Oh shit. He wanted me to strip for him and dance naked in his lap? My heart sped up again, and I twisted my hands nervously in front of me. There was no other way. This was the only job I could do and make this kind of money. My momma had done much worse for me.

I didn’t make eye contact with him. Instead I listened to the beat of the song, and I focused on moving my body in ways that I knew men liked. That was something I knew how to do. I unzipped the dress slowly, then let it fall forward just enough to tease at its falling off. He saw naked females all the time. I could do this. It was just my boobs.

I lifted my hands in the air and shimmied until the dress worked its way down my body and then fell around my ankles on the floor. I hadn’t been wearing a bra, and the tiny black panties I had on weren’t going anywhere. Garrison leaned back in his chair, and his eyes looked appreciatively over my body. I blocked that out.

I had only seen a lap dance on television once, so I wasn’t sure I knew exactly what to do. I figured I would dance over him without touching him.

Closing my eyes, I let my head fall back as I moved between his legs and danced. I didn’t think about the fact that I was topless with a strange man in a room and I was trying to turn him on. I just did what felt good.

“Put your hands on the back of the chair and lean close without touching,” Garrison said in a hoarse whisper.

I opened my eyes and did as he said. My chest was close to his face, but I didn’t look at that. I continued to dance.

“Put your foot on my knee,” he said.

I paused. “That’s touching,” I replied.

“The bottom of your shoe on my knee isn’t actual touching,” he replied, grinning at me.

I did as I was told, and his nostrils flared as he took a deep breath. “Okay, that’s good,” he said tightly.

From the tense look on his face I was afraid I had done something wrong. “If I messed up, I can try again. It was my first time,” I started to explain, and he shook his head and let out a relieved chuckle.

“You’re hired, Jess. That was perfect. You’ll have this place so packed that we won’t have any damn seats left.”

Garrison stood up and walked swiftly across the room and jerked open the door. “You can get dressed. I’ll send Dee back in.” He hurried out, and I reached for my dress and slipped it back on. When I started to zip it, Dee opened the door.

She was smiling triumphantly. “I’m impressed. It’s been years since a girl affected Garrison on her tryout. Bravo. Let’s go to my office and get your paperwork and your work schedule filled out.”

I followed her out into the hall.

Loud moaning and banging filled the hallway as we walked down it. I glanced over at a door we passed, and I had no doubt in my mind someone was having sex. Did some of the girls do that, too? I wasn’t okay with that. I was a look-not-touch only. I needed to make sure they understood that.

“I told you that you got him worked up. Good thing Farrah was here to help him burn off some steam,” Dee said, opening a door for me to follow.

I glanced back at the room as a loud male groan echoed off the walls. “That’s Garrison?” I asked, making sure I had heard her right.

“Yes. You had him sweating and shaking when he walked out of that room. He grabbed the first girl he knew would f**k him and dragged her into his office. No worries, though—he only f**ks the ones who want him. He won’t touch you.”

The sick knot I lived with these days was back. This was terrifying. My world was changing, and I realized my desire to feel safe was a childhood fantasy. This was my life.

JASON

Even if I never spoke to Jess again, I needed to get revenge. I wanted to hurt her as much as she’d hurt me. The more I thought about her pushing this off on me like I deserved it only made me angrier. It was like she had laid down a f**king ultimatum that I had failed by saying I was taking Jo to that stupid cotillion. I didn’t like being controlled. My parents had been trying to control me my entire life. All I ever did was fight to be free. Jess had been one more person wanting control of me.