Love's Second Chance (Second Chances #1)(34)
Finally looking down at the beautiful ring, I shrugged. “I don’t know. Maybe I’ll find something to do with it one day, but for now I’ll store it away for safe keeping.”
“I think that would be great,” she claimed.
“Yeah,” I murmured to myself, placing the little black box in with the other things.
“I’m going to start loading these boxes into the car,” Jenna said. She looked toward the bed and pointed. “What do you want to do with your bed?”
The thought of having to get rid of the bed broke my heart. “I don’t want to let it go, but I also don’t want to keep it. It would be great if you or my parent’s needed it.”
“Actually,” Jenna drawled out. “I could use it in the extra bedroom at home. We finally moved out all of our junk from that room and put it in storage. Now all we have is an empty room to fill.”
“Oh, Twink, that would be perfect. I can have it delivered to your house next week.”
“That sounds great,” she huffed while picking up two heavy boxes and heading out the door. I felt better knowing I wasn’t getting rid of it. Once the bedroom furniture was gone, the house would be completely empty and ready to be put on the market. I was happy in my little condo so there was no reason to stay in this huge house all by myself. Now all I needed to do was help pack up the closet. Walking into it wasn’t as hard as I expected. Jenna had packed up most of the stuff already and I was really grateful for that. All that was left now was loading the boxes into the car.
Once they were loaded, I realized that this was my final goodbye to the house. Jenna stood silently beside me as I gazed at what used to be a happy and loving home for me. “Are you ready to go home?” Jenna suggested.
I looked over at her and smiled. “Meet me there? I have one more goodbye to make first.”
Nodding in understanding, she squeezed my arm. “Take your time. I’ll get these unloaded at your condo.” I smiled once more at her before we went our separate ways. The next goodbye was going to be the last thing I needed to do before moving on completely; to finding my way back to Galen.
My throat tightened up as I drove slowly through the winding path. The granite angel monument sitting atop the small hill was the place of my destination. I wanted it to signify Carson’s guardian angel, taking his soul away to heaven, because I knew that was where he was. One day I hoped to see him again. Next to me in the car sat a single purple rose that I brought to put on his grave. Carson would always buy me multi-colored roses on special occasions because he knew I could never choose on one color; so he would make sure I had them all.
My heart pounding like crazy, I took a deep breath and opened the car door, making my way to the top of the hill. I haven’t had the courage to visit Carson until now, and I was scared to death. My eyes began to burn the closer I got, but it didn’t stop me from taking those last steps to my husband’s resting place. Kneeling down on the soft, green grass, I placed the rose on the ledge of the tombstone. The wind blew hard, bringing in the scent of fresh flowers and a rain that was about to come. Birds chirped as they took their flight while the breeze made the leaves rustle and the branches sway. It was strange that a place of sadness and death could be so peaceful and beautiful.
Carson was buried directly underneath where I was kneeling, and even though he wasn’t actually there I could still feel him in my soul. I took a deep, calming breath before speaking. “Hey Carson,” I said softly, and paused to look around. Why I waited for a reply that would obviously never come I didn’t know. Secretly, a part of me was hoping I would hear his voice talking back to me. “I’m sorry I didn’t come before, but you had to know how hard it was for me. You always told me I was a strong-willed person, but when you died I was anything but that. I ran away to forget, but I think it actually made it harder for me,” I cried. Letting the tears fall, I rubbed my hands across the deeply engraved letters of Carson’s name in the tombstone. “I miss you so much, Carson. I miss the way you laughed, the way your eyes would crinkle when you smiled, and the way you would hold me in your arms. I know the list could go on forever, but I wanted you to know that I would give anything to hear your voice again, just once.”
Closing my eyes, I let the cool breeze embrace me as the wind picked up. The spring time had come and a new life began, a new season and a time for change. “I will always love you, Carson. We may not have had all the time in the world, but it meant the world to me. Your love is inside me and I’ll hold onto it until the day I die; until the day we can see each other again.” I wiped the tears from my eyes and placed a kiss across the cold surface of Carson’s tombstone.
“Goodbye Carson,” I whispered. The wind blew again, and in my heart I believed it was Carson’s love embracing me with his final goodbye. I looked at his grave one more time before slowly walking away down the hill. I’d done what I needed to do to give my heart closure, and now it was time to find that new path; the path to new beginnings.
Driving to the office had me nervous and excited all at once. The moment Galen had been waiting patiently for had come, and I felt terrible for leaving him to guess when I’d make my way back. All I wanted to do was run into his arms and never let him go. My second chance had been here the whole time, and now I was strong enough to take it. The huge building of M&M Architectural Design was only a few blocks away and looming high into the heavens, or so it seemed when you were directly in front of it. My guardian angel was in there and I could only hope that he would receive me with open arms. He said he would wait for me, he promised to. Now that I was ready to face my fears and move on, it felt like I couldn’t get to him fast enough.