Letting Go (Surrender Trilogy #1)(13)

He leaned forward, his breath mingling with hers, their lips so close he could feel the warmth from the inviting bow. Just a fraction of an inch and he would be kissing her.

“I was there because that’s who and what I am, Joss,” he said, taking in her response, watching every flicker that crossed her eyes. “It’s always been what I am. And let me tell you this right now. If this is what you want. If this is what you need. Then I’m going to be the only damn man you offer your submission to.”

FOUR

JOSS sucked in her breath and held it until she was light-headed and precariously close to toppling over. Dash’s lips were so close that she could feel the harsh exhalation of his breath. She could see the determined glitter in his eyes. And for the first time, she became aware of him as something more than a friend. Her husband’s friend. Someone she’d turned to for support many times over the years.

She couldn’t even process his heated declaration, but she knew he was utterly serious. There was a glint in his eyes, a firm set to his jaw. She could see the pulse thudding at his neck and she could smell every part of him, his scent wafting tantalizingly through her nostrils.

Dash dominant? Not that she had any difficulty in believing that of him. He was a man well accustomed to getting his way. He had a quiet authority about him. He didn’t need to be loud to get his point across. She’d been present too many times when he’d spoken and everyone had immediately quieted, listening to what he had to say.

He wasn’t someone who shouted orders. He didn’t need to. There was an intensity to him that made people aware of the power emanating from him. She hadn’t been blind to it, nor was she immune. As she’d pondered just earlier that day, in the beginning he’d intimidated her. She’d felt his concern and disapproval over how fast her relationship had progressed with Carson. But once he’d become convinced that she was the right woman for his best friend, his loyalty to her was sealed.

But his words still rang in her ears. That brusque vow. She shivered under the intensity of his gaze, those dark eyes eating her up, exposing her, making her feel vulnerable.

“I d-don’t understand,” she said helplessly, her hand lifting and then fluttering downward again as she tried to make sense of the entire evening.

And then his next words tilted her universe even further off its axis.

“I’ve waited a long damn time for you, Joss. I thought I’d never have you, and I was okay with that because you made Carson happy and I know Carson made you happy. But as you said, he’s gone now, and I’ve waited. For what seems like an eternity I’ve waited for the right moment. For when you were ready. Maybe I waited too long, or perhaps now is the perfect time. But if you think I’m going to stand by and allow another man to touch what I consider mine, you’re very mistaken.”

She shook her head, overwhelmed by it all. Dash spoke as if he wanted her. Had wanted her for a long time. But no. That wasn’t possible. He’d never betray his best friend. Had Dash developed feelings for her after Carson’s death? Was he simply stepping in for his best friend, wanting to take care of Carson’s widow?

She didn’t want to be an obligation to Dash. She’d been one for far too long. Today had been about letting go. Not only of Carson but of her dependence on Dash.

And what flabbergasted her more was that Dash was everything she’d said she wanted, if she was to believe his impassioned statement. Dominant. He liked submissive women. And he wanted to introduce her to the lifestyle. He wanted to possess—to own—her.

“I don’t know what to say,” she said honestly. “I never imagined. I didn’t realize . . .”

“No, I suppose you didn’t,” Dash murmured. “It’s not something I could just come out and say. But Joss, you’ve made the first move. Now it’s my turn to make all the others. You’ve laid out what you want. What you need. What you desire. And I’m going to be the man who gives you those things.”

She stared back at him, still utterly overwhelmed by the day, the moment, this. How had so much changed so quickly? Then she shook her head in automatic denial even though a part of her, the part that had gone for so long unfulfilled, screamed at her that this was it. This was what she’d been looking for. But Dash?

No, they were just friends. He had been her husband’s best friend. How would it look to others? How would her friends, his family, Kylie take the shift from them being friends to becoming lovers? More than lovers. Much more. She couldn’t even fathom just how much more this kind of relationship he proposed entailed. It wouldn’t be a one-night stand. Two people hooking up in the heat of the moment. What Dash proposed was . . . permanent?

“Stop overanalyzing this, Joss,” Dash said in a patient tone. But his jaw was still tight. His eyes still glittered with unshakable resolve. God, was he serious? How could she even question that when every single part of him screamed of his absolute certainty?

And Dash was not impulsive or remotely flighty. That wasn’t who or what he was. She’d known him long enough to know that his every movement, whether in business or in his personal life, was carefully thought out. But the idea that he’d obviously given them such careful consideration blew her mind.

“But Dash. We can’t.”

She said it emphatically even as she questioned why they couldn’t. But of course they couldn’t, could they? There was more than just him and her to consider. There were their friends. Kylie. His family. It was all making her head ache with the speed at which her world had been irrevocably altered. She hadn’t experienced such a tailspin since the day she’d learned her husband was gone.