Happy Again (This is What Happy Looks Like #1.5)(18)

“There you are,” he said, blinking fast as he stepped off the escalator. “Hi.”

“Hey,” Graham said, holding on tighter when Ellie tried to let go of his hand. “We were just on our way back up.”

“Well, good,” Harry said, glancing over at Ellie with a hint of a smile. “Enjoy the movie?”

“I did,” she said with a nod. “It was very…romantic.”

Harry looked to Graham. “They’re just about ready.”

“Be up in a minute,” Graham said in a way that managed to be polite without leaving room for argument, and Harry gave a weary sigh before walking over to the other escalator and stepping on.

“It was good to see you again, Ellie,” he said, already on his way up. “Hope it won’t be the last time.”

“Thanks for the tickets,” she called, but he was already gone.

When she turned back to Graham, he was watching her with an unreadable expression. Without saying anything, she slipped the dark jacket from her shoulders, holding it out for him. He took it, and for a moment both of them held on to it, their hands only inches apart, gripping the jacket as if it were something more binding than just fabric.

But then Ellie let go, and Graham sighed as he swung it over his shoulders again.

“I should go up there,” she told him, her eyes drifting to the escalator. “My friends are probably still in the theater. And you’ve got some questions to answer.”

“I guess I do,” he said, looking over her shoulder at the two theater employees, who were whispering to each other. This part of the lobby was glassed in on all sides, and suddenly, she could tell, he felt exposed. He grabbed her hand and walked her over to the dark wedge of space beneath one of the escalators, where they stood in the red glow of an emergency-exit light.

“I hate that we have to do this again,” she said, a gnawing feeling in her stomach that felt too familiar already.

“Yeah, but it’s different this time.”

“Is it?”

He tucked a piece of hair behind her ear. “We’ll see each other again.”

“We said that last time.”

“And here we are,” he said with a grin.

“That was just luck.”

He wiggled his eyebrows. “Or fate.”

“We’ll write,” she said, because she wasn’t sure she wanted to depend on fate again for something as important as this.

“We will,” he agreed, wrapping his arms around her.

“I wish I could see you again later. How long are you here?”

“Well, there’s an after-party,” he said, leaning back to look at her. “But I’m only stopping by for pictures, and then I’ve gotta fly to Manila.”

“Oh, that’s too bad,” she said, letting her head fall against his chest again. “I’m going to straight to Paris after this.”

He laughed. “Bon voyage.”

“Sayonara.”

“Happy trails.”

Upstairs, they could hear the sound of applause, a sign that the movie had come to an end and the credits were now rolling.

But still, it took them a long time to let go of each other.

When he finally pulled back, Graham’s eyes were rimmed with red. “I guess I’d better go.”

“Game face,” she told him, trying her best to imitate his, and he shook his head with a faint smile.

“Pathetic,” he said, taking her hand, and together, they walked around to the escalator, where they stood watching the metal steps at the bottom appear one after another like magic. After a moment, Graham leaned forward to kiss her one more time, and then he gave a helpless shrug before stepping on.

Ellie stood alone at the bottom, watching him get farther and farther away, waiting to see if he’d turn back to look at her once more, the way it always happens in the movies. But he didn’t.

Sixteen

Ellie could hear the applause when the panel was introduced: the actors and director, the writers and producers. Still, she didn’t go in. There was no point in torturing herself by watching him from afar. Her friends would find her out here when it was over.

The lobby was nearly empty, with just the girl behind the concession stand and a few people in line for the bathroom. There was a red velvet banquette beneath the huge chandelier, and she sat there for a while, watching the popcorn rise in the glass box, watching the security guard shift from foot to foot outside the door, watching two women who even she could tell must be publicists whispering furiously as they read something on their phones.

Every now and then, someone would walk out of the theater, and the door would open, the amplified voices of the panel drifting out. At one point, Ellie heard the sound of Graham’s laughter, and her leaden heart sank lower in her chest.

Finally her curiosity got the best of her, and she walked over uncertainly, pulling the door open just enough to slip through, then inching slowly along the dark corridor until she was standing at the very back of the aisle.

Onstage, a row of eight people sat on stools, and just beside them was a man at a podium. The enormous white screen above showed a close-up of the whole panel, and Ellie saw that Graham was in the middle, right between Mick and Olivia, his posture as casual and relaxed as if he were simply sitting in his kitchen at home, rather than on display before a thousand people.