Hanging On (Jessica Brodie Diaries #2)(10)

She was used to our blank stares, and didn’t bother looking up.

A while later William came back in with a disheveled look. The weather was starting to cool off, but he looked flushed.

“What’s the verdict, Doc?” I asked from the corner, a stack of cards in my hand.

He shook his head, continuing to the bathroom to wash his greasy hands. Once that was accomplished, he gave me the news. “Well, I’ve got good news and bad. Which would you like to hear first?”

“Bad news, please.”

“It needs repairs to be drivable. Radiator, hoses, maybe other things, I’m not sure. If you get all these things it will probably only last another couple months, maybe half a year before something else breaks.”

“I see. Good news?”

“Two things. First, I was able to drive it to the street where it will be safe for a week, or until you decide what to do with it. Second, I can probably fix all of those things if you really want me to.”

“Which means, you would really rather not but with a strong arm I could get ‘r done?”

“Hit the nail on the head.”

I sighed loudly. Fuck.

I looked up at William, who was intently studying me. Gladis had a perfectly blank face, which was not characteristic of the usually lively older lady. Even Lady was glancing at me through her eyelashes.

It was clear they all thought this was my crossroads. Either I patched it up, which meant I was probably still planning on jumping ship, heading back to LA or over to Australia like I had planned when I incredibly heartbroken--so, a day ago--or I thought more long term and found a solution to match. But a car payment was a commitment all in itself. One requiring money. That I didn’t have. Conundrum.

So I shrugged. “I’ll need to think on it.”

William seemed to wind up before my eyes, and Gladis stayed still as a stone. Not much I could do about it. They had cobs of money. Not like they had to worry about a car payment, rent, food, and a thousand other things all coming out of one measly paycheck. Even if those things were dirt cheap, school loans were kicking my ass. This sucked.

I stood up. Time to get a move on. “Kay Gladis, I am going to head. Shall I stop in later tonight?”

“Oh no honey. One of the kids said they were going to stop in. I want to look old and alone when they get here.”

“Is this the first visit?” William asked.

“A-yup,” she answered blandly. “And just the one, too. They all live under sixty miles away and they couldn’t be bothered to visit the woman that fed ‘em. Spoiled rotten!”

William wisely kept his face neutral. I pretended like I didn’t hear the outburst.

“Okay, well, I’ll see you gals for dinner tomorrow then,” I said lightly.

Lady nodded and Gladis said good-bye.

When we got back into William’s car he was strangely quiet. I tried a few starts at conversation, but everything fell flat. We drove for about twenty minutes and finally ended up in a plaza of shops.

When the car was in park, and usually when two people would normally exit the vehicle, William sat staring straight ahead. Unfortunately, I knew why. I thought it best to wait for the wave to crash over me instead of swimming out to meet it. The end result would be the same.

“Are you leaving?” I asked in clipped tones.

Usually I would say when you are, which was a literal reference to leaving the car. I wasn’t really in the mood to wave the red flag at the bull over this one, though. I played it safe.

“William, I am still ass backwards with everything. You and me are so new. We don’t really even know each other yet. We could hate each other in a month. Then what? I would be back in the same situation I was for the last three months. I just don’t know. It’s a big risk.”

“It’s a bigger reward. If we don’t work, so what? We don’t work.” He turned to face me. The pain and uncertainly in his eyes knotted my stomach. I had never known a guy to get so serious so fast. It was both exciting and terrifying. And I was both hopeful and jaded. I’d been hurt so many times, it was impossible to go into this with lamb eyes one day in.

I shifted and straightened my pants, buying time. Finally I said, “William, to you it’s just a car. If we didn’t work, you’d take the loss and move on.”

“I don’t understand. Why is that logic so unfathomable? I think we have a real shot. I don’t know you that well, technically, but I feel like I do. I feel like you’ve been the only one to really grab me, ever. And that must stand for something. I would almost say love at first sight.” He suddenly turned bright red. “Well, I mean, you know, I felt really strongly about you even in those first moments, and it has only gotten worse. Better, I mean. Stronger.”

“Then there is your mom,” I tempered, shifting the conversation away from the embarrassing truth, which was my empty wallet. “I am not a part of your world. Gladis might think she can work that out somehow, but I am not from money. I won’t fit, and you will eventually feel resentment.”

“How long were you listening?” he asked crossly.

“We were just walking up on you. I didn’t hear much, but that’s not the point William!”

I took a deep breath to calm myself, then started again. “Okay, look. I’ll break it down for you. I do want to hang around for a while. You were really the only reason I was leaving in the first place. Now there are more reasons to stay than go. I want to work up in the company, and I want to be an adult. I need at least a couple years in the job before I am even taken seriously anywhere else.