Forget About Midnight (Alexa O'Brien, Huntress #9)(35)

“Fine. I’ll meet you. Come alone and come armed.” I didn’t have to tell her why. If I lost control, I would want her to stop me before I could hurt her.

When I ended the call, I looked up to find Kale standing in the hallway watching me. Clad in only sweat pants, his bare chest drew my gaze. “Come back to bed.”

There was something in the way he said it, like it was more than a casual statement. It was the plea of someone who knew time was running out and wanted to grasp each moment left until they had all slipped away. He was really going to leave me.

The gravity of it was more than I could bear. It wasn’t like when Shaz had left. He had needed to do that for himself. It was hard, but I had taken solace in the fact that he’d been on a personal quest. Though I questioned it, in my heart, I’d known he would return.

With Kale it was all so different. He was leaving because we turned each other into the worst kind of vampire. Leaving me was the only way he’d find even a shred of freedom from the hold I had on him. He would always be mine though, which meant returning would always be dangerous for us both. He might never come back.

I’d always expected that Arys would bring out the worst of what I was. I found no pleasure in being wrong about that.

With a nod I rose and went to Kale. Slipping into his arms, I pressed my face to his shoulder and basked in his honey-sweet vibe. He coaxed me back into the bedroom where we shed what little clothing we wore and became entangled in one another.

Was it right? Was it wrong? It didn’t matter. It was the beginning of goodbye.

My hair hung long and loose; my makeup, a blend of dramatic dark lines and shadows. I kept pulling my hair up into a ponytail before dropping it against my back in frustration. I was nervous about seeing Juliet. Midnight-blue eyes didn’t make me look or feel any more like myself.

“Screw it,” I muttered, turning away from my reflection. It wasn’t getting any easier to see myself with Arys’s eyes and fangs. Many times I had to stop myself from slamming my fist into the mirror.

Kale was already gone. He’d gone to see Jez, most likely to tell her about his intent to join Jenner in Las Vegas. She wasn’t going to take it well. She relied on him more than he realized. With Jez’s recent drug abuse issues, she was going to need me as much as I needed her. Which was a lot.

I was glad they would have some time alone together. Our group dynamic had been screwed up in recent months, and it had been hard on Jez. Plus, it gave me the opportunity to go see Jenner alone. I had a few things to say to him that I didn’t want any witnesses for.

With a spritz of vanilla perfume, I was ready to leave. Black leggings and a long, loose tank top with the Stark family wolf let me move with comfort and precision. I brought my long leather coat to hide my dagger, not because I needed it. I barely felt the cold these days.

Kale’s house was quiet, dreadfully so. I hated the way it felt without him. It gave me a grim sense of foreshadowing. My pace quickened as I vacated the lonely house.

However my step neared a skip as I approached my big red beast of a car sitting at the curb. I was eager to get my hands on the Dragon Claw. I retrieved it from the trunk, a happy sigh escaping me as I ran my hand along the flat part of the blade. It hummed beneath my touch. Damn, I’d missed it. Fear had kept me from touching it, but as I did, Shya’s words rang with the truth. The dagger was no more of a threat than it had ever been. Unless it was turned on me by an opponent with great aim, I had little to fear.

Murmuring sweet nothings to the shiny blade, I slipped it into its sheath and tossed it on the floor on the passenger side as I got into the Charger. Turning the local rock station on loud, I pulled out of Kale’s neighborhood, wondering when it would be for the last time.

As I drove with the raucous sound of Alexisonfire filling the confines of the car, I tapped a finger on the wheel in time with the beat and began to ponder. I pondered what exactly I would say to Jenner. I pondered the FPA backlash that I knew was coming. And I pondered if perhaps it was time to go home. Or at the very least, to leave Kale’s house.

Home. Such a funny word. It could mean so many things. People lost it, found it, built it. And in an instant, the entire meaning of it could change. My home had changed many times, the physical structure anyway. It had even been burnt to the ground. Currently, it sat in downtown Edmonton with a stylish new sign that beamed the words: The Wicked Kiss.

Funny how a place I’d once loathed had become something of a comfort. I hated that.

I felt fine as I strode across the parking lot to the front entry. Maybe even a little cocky and invincible. The sign above the door flickered as I passed beneath it, then I crossed the threshold and was immediately hit with the scent and energy of many human bodies packed into one place.

Being new meant facing the bloodlust nightly until I mastered it. Arys and Kale no longer had to feed every night. They could abstain several days if needed. I was in newbie hell. Lucky for me, I was in the right place to find victims. I just needed to somehow avoid killing them and breaking my own rule.

I passed Justin with a smile and nod, not wanting to give him the chance to see how fragile my control was. Right away my gaze went to Willow’s spot at the bar. Disappointment crushed me when I saw it occupied by someone else.

Where are you, Willow?

Jenner wasn’t there yet. Momentarily I worried that he would bring Arys. That moment quickly passed as a cute twenty-something with a heartbeat caught my eye. He was watching me with a dark brow raised, trying to decide if I was predator or prey. I flashed him a flirty smile, broadly revealing fangs. It was all the encouragement he needed.