Following Me(79)

“You wanted to talk, but I’m doing all the talking,” he said. “Don’t you have anything to say for yourself?”

He grabbed her arms and hoisted her out of the chair he had just thrown her into. His hands circled her bicep and squeezed, pulling her face-to-face with him. The pressure on her arms was agonizing.

“You want to know why I left?” she asked. “This is why I left. I was tired of you hurting me.”

“If you didn’t hurt me so badly, I wouldn’t have to do anything. Why do you want to hurt me, Devon?” he asked. He shook her forcefully. “Explain it to me. Why would you leave me, lie to me, cheat on me?” he yelled.

A tear ran down her cheek, and there was nothing she could do about it. “Reid, please,” she said, blinking back tears. “Don’t hurt me.”

“I shouldn’t hurt you?” he asked in disbelief. He slammed her back into the wall. “I shouldn’t hurt you? After what you did to me, you think I should just let you go? You think I should let someone else get his grubby hands on you? You’re mine, Devon!” he yelled into her face. “You’re mine!”

Reid threw her on the ground, and her head collided with the corner of the side table. She saw spots through her vision while she heard ringing in her ears. She was sure Reid was saying something, but she wasn’t sure what it was. Her breath came out in gasps as tears poured down her face, and then the shock of the fall hit her. She tentatively reached her hand to the back of her head and felt the lump that was already forming. It was too tender to even touch lightly with her fingertips.

“Do you hear me?” Reid cried, bending over and forcing her to look at him.

“What?” Devon whispered, her voice light and wispy. She didn’t feel too well.

“You’re not even listening to me,” he cried, looking maniacal. “You’ve got to be f**king kidding me. How can I make myself any clearer to you?”

“I don’t know,” she said, trying unsuccessfully to stand.

She felt silly sitting on the floor with him towering over her, screaming at her, but she needed to let the stars clear first. She had seen stars before. Sometimes, she had blacked out from them. She couldn’t black out right now. She needed to keep her mind active. No sleeping.

Think about something else. Think about Brennan. What would he do if he were here? He was a doctor’s son. He would take care of her, hold her while she cried, and kiss her wounds. He wouldn’t do anything to harm her. He would wipe her tears away and tell her he never wanted to see her cry again. He thought she was beautiful. That made her smile.

“Oh, you have something to smile about?” Reid yelled, breaking through her reverie. “Do share what is so funny.”

“Nothing,” she said, trying to stand again.

Reid grabbed her wrist and yanked roughly until she was on her feet. Her shoulder wrenched, and she was sure he was going to pull it out of its socket. By the time he had lifted her all the way to her feet, her shoulder was screaming at her. She steadied herself on the wall to keep from falling back over. The stars were clearing a bit, but she still felt slow and hazy all over. Her mind needed to start clearing. Reid was going over the edge, and she couldn’t afford to be out of it.

“That’s right. You are nothing without me. Just look at you,” he said, gesturing to her. “You’re a wreck.”

“I’m a wreck because of you,” Devon mumbled.

Reid laughed at her. “You think I made you a whore? I don’t even know why I want to be with you, except that I love you. I will eventually forgive you for the things you have done wrong.”

“You’ll forgive me?” she asked in disbelief. Really? Was he going to try and blame her for everything?

“That’s just the kind of guy I am,” he said a bit too calmly.

Devon closed and opened her eyes, feeling the haze slowly lift. It was too slow, much too slow. She hadn’t had that much to drink so that she could stay alert, and now, with one tumble, she was losing it. She tried keeping her eyes closed longer to see if that would help, but when she opened them again, Reid was standing right in front of her.

When he pressed her backward, she swallowed, wondering what else he could possibly want from her. She was a fool to believe that he would just be able to talk, that he wouldn’t hit her like he had every other time. And she would be a fool now to think he was done with her.

Reid reached out and stroked her hair like she was a pet. He was staring at her possessively, and it was terrifying. His subdued demeanor after an outburst frightened her more than the outburst. At least when he exploded, she knew what to expect. The restraint made it more difficult to judge him.

His hand trailed down her side to her waist. Her head started to clear, and all she could think about was escaping. She wanted to run. She wanted to get away, but she couldn’t move. He kissed her cheek, across her jawline, down her neck, across her collarbone…anywhere he could reach. Devon whimpered, trying to shift away from him, but his body held her in place.

“Reid, stop,” she pleaded.

He picked her up like a rag doll and carried her across the room to the giant bed. Her panic heightened at the thought of what he might be thinking.

“Reid, please stop. Please. No!”

He tossed her back on the bed, and before she could scramble away, he yanked on her ankle and pulled her flat against the bed.