Fantastical (Fantasyland #3)(81)
I sucked in breath and stared at her.
She squeezed my hand.
“Love is a mighty thing,” she carried on. “When we deal with the people we love, everything they do, no matter how slight or how huge, has awesome power over us, our emotions, our behavior, our reactions. You love this man and you feel betrayed that he didn’t believe you but pretended he did. I get that. I even get why you’d hold onto it and the power that betrayal would have over you. But, sweetie, you’d told him you were from a different world. If Rosa was not in that world, our dinner in there,” she jerked her head to the wall between the kitchen and dining room, “would have had a far different ending. There is no way in hell you, or Tor, would have been able to convince your father or me that he was from another world. I still find it unbelievable. And the only way I can make it so it doesn’t freak me out is to understand the little girl I lost wasn’t lost in that world, she has a beautiful life in that world. The rest of it…” she trailed off and shook her head.
“I’m sorry it freaks you out,” I whispered.
“I’m sorry you’re going through this. And I’m worried you’re going through this,” she whispered back.
“Me too,” I agreed with considerable feeling.
“But I have to tell you, sweetheart, that if you have to go through it, I’m pleased as punch you’re going through it with that man in there.”
I blinked. “You are?”
She nodded. “That man in there would run through fire for you.”
Oh my.
“Do you think?” I whispered.
Her head tipped to the side again. “Don’t you?”
“I –”
“Let that go,” Mom interrupted me on a shake of my hand. “Cora, you could close your eyes tonight and be anywhere tomorrow. The only way I’m going to be able to live with this is to hope to all that is holy that wherever you wake up tomorrow, that man is with you.”
I felt my nose stinging (yes, again!) and whispered, “Mom.”
“I’m being straight with you. I could… I could… hell, I did lose you for two months and…” she trailed off and her eyes filled with tears.
“Mom,” I whispered again and pulled her into my arms, her arms went around me tight and we both held on as we cried.
Then she suddenly let me go but her hands came up, she grabbed both my cheeks and she got right in my face. Her eyes were bright and intense and at the sight of them, my breath hitched.
“I could lose you tomorrow and never see you again,” she told me fiercely and my breath hitched again. “And the only thing I can hold onto to be able to rest my head on the pillow at night is the thought that wherever you are, you’re with him and he’s riding his horse or driving his car or flying his spaceship, I don’t care, but he’s doing it with you, he’s not letting you go and he won’t let any harm come to you. That’s the only thing I have. And right now, that is what your man is giving your father. So, I think it is very wise to let your father have as much peace of mind as your man can give him before whatever happens next, happens.” Her thumbs swept my cheeks and she finished on a whisper, “Do you get me?”
I nodded and my fingers came up and curled around her wrists. “I get you, Mom.”
“Promise, whatever happens, you’ll be safe,” she demanded fervently.
“I promise,” I promised on another hitch of breath.
“No more wielding daggers,” she ordered and I pressed my lips together because who knew what could happen? I couldn’t promise that.
“How about, I promise not to wield daggers unless absolutely necessary?” I replied, she stared at me a second then she burst out laughing and wrapped her arms tight around me again.
I shoved my face in her neck and when her hilarity calmed, I said into her skin, “I love you, Mom and when I was gone, I missed you and the worst thing about being gone was thinking I’d never see you and Dad again and I didn’t have the chance to say good-bye.”
Her arms gave me a squeeze and she whispered, “Oh sweetie.”
My arms gave her a squeeze and I whispered back, “So, if we go again, I want you to know, and never forget, that I’ll miss you and I’ll always love you. Always.”
She shoved her face even further in my neck and held on even tighter.
Moments passed as we held each other and just when I was about to let go, she said, “One more promise, Cora.”
“Anything, Mom,” I replied and her head went back but her arms stayed around me.
“Hold onto him tight. Don’t let that man go. For me, for your Dad and mostly… mostly, my beautiful, funny girl,” her hand came up to cup my cheek and her eyes stared deep into mine, “for you. Yeah?”
I bit my lips and even between my lips, they trembled.
I let them go and said quietly, “He could be lost to me.”
“Then hold on tight.”
“It might not –”
Her arm gave me a squeeze. “Hold on tight.”
“He –”
“Cora, learn this from your mother. There are not many men like him in this world or his, I’d guess. Men like him don’t come around very often. Men like him who look at my girl like she holds the other half to his soul and he couldn’t exist without her are even more rare.” I held my breath at her words, a part of both Tor and Rosa’s story I did not share, but words she used anyway while she concluded, “So hold… on… tight.”