Fantastical (Fantasyland #3)(79)

Oh my. I was Cora, the Gracious.

How freaking cool!

“How freaking cool!” I cried, grinning at him, he shook his head and looked at my mother.

“This language and her stubborn bent at being uncommonly friendly to everyone she encounters is not behavior befitting a princess. I persist in telling her this but she doesn’t listen. I assume I have you to thank for that.”

“I, uh… uh… um…” Mom stammered, looking up at Tor and, I could see, coming to the realization that she had a being from a parallel universe at her table. “My daughter’s a princess?”

“Of course, she’s my wife,” Tor replied.

“I keep telling you, Tor, I’m not your wife,” I snapped and his eyes cut to me.

“And I keep telling you, my love, that you’re going to be and, as far as I’m concerned, you already are.”

“You’re married to my parallel world twin!” I cried.

“This will be severed officially upon our return. Luckily, Cora and I were wed in Bellebryn and the person who grants annulments in Bellebryn is me. Therefore, it will simply be a signature on a piece of paper and then you and I will be wed.”

“You’re marrying him?” Dad asked.

“No!” I exclaimed hotly.

“Yes,” Tor answered.

“I am not!” I stated, my voice rising.

“My love, you are,” Tor said to me.

“No I’m not. You can be a jerk,” I informed him.

“And you’re not a handful?” he returned.

“No! You just said I was Cora, the Gracious,” I retorted and Tor looked to my father.

“She’s exceedingly friendly to every creature in my realm. Even the birds flock down to tell her good morning and my horse has told me he’d die for her. But to me, she can, at times, be extremely vexing.”

“Salem said that?” I whispered, feeling my heart squeeze and Tor’s eyes came to me.

“He cares deeply for you,” he whispered back.

Then something else he said came to me and I snapped, “I’m not vexing!”

He crossed his arms on his chest and leveled his gaze on me. “Cora, you cleaned my cave and scraped your feet raw in doing so. You fled after our fight with the vickrants and put the entire kingdom in jeopardy. You made me climb up a tree to save a half-dead bird –”

“All right, all right, I can be vexing,” I gave in then fired back, “But you’re more vexing!”

It wasn’t good but it was all I had.

“And how am I vexing? Except,” he said swiftly when I instantly opened my mouth to speak, “when I’m not giving you your way.”

“Tor, you bought two carts full of food at the grocery store.”

“Did you pay for this food?” Tor asked.

“No,” I answered tersely.

“Did you carry it up to your rooms?” he went on.

“No!” I snapped.

“Then why is that vexing?” he enquired sensibly and logically.

My neck twisted so I could look at my mother and I announced, “He’s the sensible and logical one, even in my world. I tell you, Mom, it’s annoying. When I hit his world and the curse started to fall, I freaked way the hell out. I was a wreck! But Tor here?” I leaned back and shook my head. “No.” I drew out the “no” for about twelve syllables. “He doesn’t freak out. He wants to drive a car, I show him the ignition and the turn signals and,” I lifted a hand and snapped my fingers, “he’s driving a car. We need to change a lock, we go to the hardware store, get the stuff, go home and,” I snapped again, “he’s changed the lock. I’m telling you, it drives me mad.”

Tor called my attention to him by asking, “Sweets, would you prefer that I was quivering, scared of my shadow and incapable of providing for you?”

“No! But you could give me something.”

“Why? You didn’t give me anything. You kept the fire burning. You cooked the rabbits on the spit. You cleaned the cave. You say you were a wreck, my love, but I saw none of that. By the gods, you wielded a blade and fought the vickrants with me.”

“A blade?” Mom whispered.

“Your daughter is handy with a dagger,” Tor informed Mom proudly and I turned and grinned down at her.

“Totally, Mom. You should have seen me,” I bragged then pointed at myself. “Warrior princess, in the flesh.”

“Bloody hell, warrior princess,” Tor muttered and my eyes shot to him.

“Well, I was! You even said so!” I cried.

“I need whisky,” Dad put in at this point, my body went ramrod straight and I looked at my father who had an expression on his face I’d never seen before. I was guessing he now wished that I was actually simply insane or had hooked up with the leader of a cult who seduced feeble-minded women and convinced them he was from an alternate universe instead of being hooked up with an actual warrior prince from a parallel world.

“Dad –” I started but Dad was looking at Tor.

“Do you drink whisky?” he asked Tor.

“I do,” Tor replied.

“Comin’ right up,” Dad muttered and turned to the liquor cabinet on the wall.