Falling Light (Game of Shadows #2)(36)

Michael said, “After the trip we had, I thought you would sleep longer. If I’d known you would wake this early, I would have brought you the dry clothes Astra brought. At least you’ve managed to find a solution for yourself.”

“It’ll do for now, but I could wish for a little less breeze,” she said wryly. “And my feet are freezing.” She shook her head at the seat Michael offered. Instead she held herself erect as she turned to meet the shrewd black gaze that watched her with an inscrutable patience. Feeling at a complete loss, she said, “Hello, Astra.”

Chapter Thirteen

ASTRA’S DARK, UPTURNED eyes filled with a sudden glitter of tears, and her delicate, papery expression reformed. “Thank you, Creator,” Astra breathed. “It’s been so long.”

Without warning, a huge, tangled wave of emotion welled inside of Mary, like the creature from her dream that had risen from an immeasurable depth.

Deep gladness, grief, anger and pain, and a baffled kind of love. To her intense shock and embarrassment, a sob broke out of her. The sound cracked through the quiet.

Astra lifted both hands to her. She sank to her knees and took them. Then she leaned forward to put her face in the old woman’s lap. Her shoulders clenched as she tried to rein in her emotion. Astra leaned over and held her tight.

“I’m so sorry,” Mary said when she could speak. Her breathing had turned ragged as she struggled for control. “Sometimes I don’t understand myself.”

“Don’t hover, Michael,” Astra snapped over her head. “This is mine to deal with. Go away.”

“Mary, would you like me to stay?” Michael asked. She felt his large, warm hand press against her back.

“It’s okay,” she said, swiping at her eyes and nose with the corner of her blanket. Regardless of whether or not Astra could hear her, she added telepathically, I need to talk with her, but I would appreciate it if you didn’t go far.

I won’t. Call if you need me.

Thank you.

She felt his fingers brush her tangled hair. His departure was noiseless, but she knew without looking when his presence had moved away. She lifted her head from Astra’s lap and sat back on her heels, rubbing her scratchy eyes.

After a keen, searching glance, Astra turned brisk.

“I brought down hot tea and water, biscuits and bacon,” she said, taking one of the two thermos bottles and pouring a measure of hot brown liquid into its lid. “There are more amenities up at the cabin, of course, but I also have a couple of visitors. I thought it would be better if we could have a little privacy before we head up.”

Mary said, “When Nicholas brought your message, he told us that his father is here.”

“Yes. Nicholas’s young nephew Jamie is here as well.” Astra’s gaze stayed focused on the hot drink she held. “Michael and I also didn’t want to leave or disturb you, so I fixed a snack to bring down here for when you woke. Here, drink up. It’s sweet.”

“Thank you,” Mary said.

She sipped with care at the steaming cup. She wanted the tea badly but her thirst was too strong to be assuaged by delicate sips. Before she could ask, Astra handed her the second opened flask. She set the tea aside to gulp at the cool fresh-tasting water until the flask was empty.

In silence, Astra offered her other things. Unable to face solid food just yet, she shook her head at the plastic container filled with biscuits and bacon. When the older woman dug into nearby canvas bags and held out a pair of thermal socks, she gladly accepted them and tugged them over her chilled feet.

Then she edged as close to the campfire as she could without sitting in the middle of the coals and setting herself on fire. After she had tucked the blanket around her cross-legged form and picked up her tea again, Astra spoke.

“What is it that you don’t understand about yourself?” the old woman asked as she picked up a long stick and poked at the fire. “Why you bawled, or why you’re so angry with me?”

Shocked by the directness, she took a deep breath. Unsure of how to respond, she hid her face in her cup. The steam from the liquid warmed the cold end of her nose. “I didn’t know I was so obvious.”

“You know,” Astra said after a moment. “You probably don’t remember this, at least not yet, but the decision to come after the Deceiver wasn’t just a group one. Each of you had to make the decision for yourself. The understanding was that if either one in a mated pair chose not to come on this journey, that one’s partner would abide by that choice and stay home.”

“No, I don’t remember that,” she muttered, keeping her head bent.

“All of you chose to go after the Deceiver with me, and you followed me here. None of us could have known how long this fight would take.” The seams around her mouth deepened. They seemed to cut as deep into her face as fractured granite cut into the earth. “Is that why you’re angry?”

Mary listened intently, picking through the information Astra offered in an effort to see if any of it matched with her emotions. When the other woman finished speaking, she shook her head.

“That’s not it,” she said. The thermos lid of tea had cooled enough for her to drain it. “I could say that seeing you felt like coming home, but it doesn’t. Other than one recurring dream where we all drank the poison, I don’t even remember what our home was like. Seeing you feels more like seeing some long-lost member of the family.”