Echoes at Dawn (KGI #5)(68)

Her mouth fell open. Yeah, she’d opened the link but hadn’t considered the consequences of him knowing her every thought.

“Let me tell you something, Grace. I’m not worthy of you. Do you even know the things I’ve done? What’s your worst sin? Wanting to give up rather than face a lifetime of pain and misery and of having the misery of others foisted onto you in an endless cycle? Look at the things you’ve done, willingly or not. You’ve given people a new lease on life. You saved a child who would otherwise be dead right now and you risked your own life to do it because your heart is too soft for you to say no even though it might have meant your own death.

“You have no idea of the things I’ve done, the choices I’ve made. Most of my life has been spent in areas so gray that light had long since fled. Always in the shadows. Questionable causes. Hell, I’m a mercenary, Grace. Which means that if someone pays me enough money, I’ll do the job.

“You don’t even want to know some of the jobs I’ve taken. Your soft heart would weep over some of the things I’ve done and the choices I’ve made. All in the name of the greater good. Fuck that. Good for who? That’s always the question. Someone always benefits and someone always suffers. There’s no way for everyone to be happy or safe or content. I’m a saint to some, the very devil himself to others. It all depends on which side of the coin you find yourself on. So don’t give me this bullshit about how you don’t have#x2019;t my courage or bravery because that’s just going to piss me off. What you have is something I’ll never have. Goodness that goes bone deep. Unwavering convictions and empathy for others. You have a soul, Grace. I lost mine when I allowed myself to die and my parents to be told I no longer existed. I lost my soul when my sister died in my arms because I wasn’t there to protect her.”

Grace silenced him with a kiss. She grabbed his face and slammed her lips over his, feeding hungrily on his mouth. Tears ran freely down her cheeks until they both tasted the slight salt on their tongues.

“Stop, just stop,” she whispered brokenly. “I can’t bear that you see yourself that way.”

He pulled gently away, his eyes bleak as he stood. He believed everything he’d said so passionately. And she hated it.

She scooted forward on the couch, not willing to let him escape. She tried to stand but he wouldn’t let her, and so she pulled him back down until he was on his knees in front of her, their faces just inches apart.

She stroked his face with both hands, smoothing over his jaw and cheekbones, frantic to ease some of the pain and self-condemnation that billowed from his soul.

“Do you want to know what I see when I look at you?” she said around the knot in her throat.

He tried to look away but she held firm, turning his face, refusing to allow him to escape her gaze.

“I see a man who’s honorable. Who gave his everything to a cause he believed in. I see a man who, upon realizing that the path he’d chosen was no longer in keeping with the principles he held close, walked away and re-created himself in a role as protector, savior, leader and, yes, hero. You may not like the label, Rio, but you are a hero. You’re my hero. You’re my savior and protector. Who else would have come for me if not you? Who else would have fought for me, refusing to let me go?

“We all make mistakes, Rio. The mark of a man is how he makes up for those mistakes, and you’ve more than paid your penance.”

He leaned his forehead against hers, and for a moment

they sat there in silence, their breathing the only sound in the room.

“I’ll make you a deal,” she murmured. “I won’t think I’m unworthy of you and your love if you never ever question that you’re worthy of mine. Deal?”

Rio smiled. He kissed her long and sweet, their tongues dueling and teasing. Light touches. Loving touches. His hands were on her face just as hers were on his. Holding. Touching. Caressing.

“Deal,” he said huskily. “Now I want you to sit here while I fix you something to eat. You need to regain your strength for what lies ahead. The others will join us because we have to plan our departure.”

She tried not to flinch. She knew it had to come to an end, this idyllic escape from reality. But it didn’t stop the regret or the knowledge that her entire world could change and she could lose everything in as little as a day.

CHAPTER 31

GRACE was welcomed by Rio’s team members with great enthusiasm. They all gathered to sit at the bar in the kitchen while Rio fried up hamburgers. They spent several minutes grilling her on her condition, how she was feeling and if she was going to be okay.

Smiling, she assured them that she would be fine.

Rio let them fuss over Grace for a period of time and then he effectively put a halt to any lighthearted banter by announcing that they were pulling out.

The men immediately becamer all business.

“What’s the plan?” Terrence asked.

Rio stood over the stove eyeing his team with utter seriousness. “I feel like they’re getting close. It’s a gut feeling and I don’t want to take any chances. My main reason for coming here was to give Grace time to heal. This isn’t where I want to engage Titan. There are some advantages. This our home turf. We know the lay of the land. But we don’t have the manpower necessary, and if Sam sends in Steele or we have all of KGI pouring in here, if Titan didn’t already know where we were, they sure as hell would at that point.”