Echoes at Dawn (KGI #5)(67)

She was deathly afraid of having that bubble burst. They were not living in a dream world. Not everything was hearts and roses. They’d hollowed out a little niche, a temporary break from reality, but the real world waited like a predator. Teeth gnashing, evil. Those who pursued her hadn’t given up. And they wouldn’t.

Soon they’d go back into that harsh, cold reality, a place where people died, a place where people gave no thought to humanity. She’d be caged, used, the equivalent of a monkey taken out when it was time to perform and then shoved back into her cold, impersonal prison.

“Grace.”

Rio’s impatient voice cut through her maudlin thoughts and she realized it wasn’t the first time he’d called her name. She blinked, also realizing that he’d already put her on the couch and apparently he’d been trying to get her attention for some time.

“What the hell is going on in that head of yours?”

His frown was deep, his lips set into a firm line. It was clear he had no liking for her expression, or perhaps the darkness of her thoughts had transmitted themselves to him. He looked worried and a little pissed.

She closed her mouth mutinously, not wanting to be a huge damper. It wasn’t as if he didn’t know all of what she’d been thinking anyway. It was a reality he lived with each and every day. He didn’t need her adding to his worry with her whining.

He sighed. “We’re seriously going to have to work on communication. This clamming up when I ask you what you’re thinking drives me insane. I’m a result-oriented guy. When I ask, I’m not used to being told no.”

She grinned. “Guess there’s always a first time for everything.”

He gave her a dark scowl.

“I’m not one of your men or your underlings,” she said with a snort. “I don’t take having orders barked at me too well. It’s the rebel in me. Shea used to try to boss me around all the time, especially after we split up and went our separate ways for safety reasons. We see how well that worked out.”

Rio tipped her chin up so they were eye to eye. “The only time I expect you to obey me without hesitation is when your life is on the line and we’re in a combat situation. The rest of the time, you’re perfectly free to argue all you like. But I’ll tell you now, if I tell you to do something when it counts and you balk, I’ll tan your behind. You don’t get a free pass from me just because you’re gorgeous and I happen to be in love with your ass.”

A giggle escaped and she clapped a hand over her mouth.

“Now, you want to tell me what had you looking so worried a minute ago? It has nothing to do with you being submissive to my overbearing arrogant self. I can’t exactly reassure you if I don’t know what the hell you’re worrying over.”

Her heart softened and she reached out to touch his cheek. “I love that you don’t want me to worry, but until this is over, until I know for certain that I’m safe and can lead a normal life, I’m going to worry. Because now, I don’t only have myself and Shea to worry about. I have you and your men. Shea’s new family and her loved ones. You’re all involved and I hate that I’m responsible for so much danger to so many people.”

He started to protest, but she silenced him with a finger to his lips. “You asked and I’m just being honest. I know that we’re in this kind of bubble right now where time is standing still and that, all too soon, at any moment, we’re going to be thrust back into the harsh reality that is my existence. y existeAnd I hate it. I dread it. I’m sick with worry. Before, I was ready to die. I had given up. I didn’t care what happened to me because I couldn’t imagine ever being free and I’d rather have died than to continue to live in captivity being used on a daily basis.

“But now I have people who matter to me. People I care about. And I don’t want them to die for me. I don’t want them to make sacrifices for me. So I dread losing the temporary reprieve, the fantasy of a normal life with a man who loves me. Because I know tomorrow, it may all come to an end.”

Rio framed her face in both hands, his eyes as fierce as his expression. “I’m not going to lie to you, Grace. I don’t know what will happen. I’m not going to offer you any guarantees and say that we’re going to be able to keep you safe from any threat or that nothing will ever hurt you again. I can’t do that. I know what we’re up against. But what I can promise you is that, as long as I’m breathing, I will do anything I can to protect you. With my dying breath, I’ll always be between you and whatever is threatening you. And if, God forbid, you’re ever taken from me, I will go to hell to get you back.”

She pulled him to her, kissing him fiercely, allowing the depth of her feelings to pour out physically and emotionally. She opened the path between them, showing him not only with her body but with her mind what his declaration meant to her. To have this proud warrior pledge his very life to keeping her safe was more than she could even process.

She wasn’t deserving. She wasn’t brave like he was. She didn’t have a fourth of his courage. She had no idea why of all the women in the world, he’d chosen her. But she was savagely happy that he had, and by God, she’d never let him go.

Rio yanked away, his eyes sparking with fury. “Bullshit.”

She blinked and then her eyes widened.

“Deserving? You aren’t worthy of me? You don’t have my courage or bravery? That’s the biggest bunch of bullshit I’ve ever heard in my life.”