Death Wish (Alexa O'Brien, Huntress #5)(18)

“Don’t analyze it. Just come by. See you soon.”

I stared at my phone long after he’d disconnected the call. I wasn’t sure how I felt about Shaz going to Arys. It was just so unlikely. I didn’t know what to make of it.

By the time I stood on Arys’s front step, I was a mess of nerves. I tried to swallow my unease, knowing how obvious it would be to them. There was no shaking it; I fully expected to be the bad guy here.

The sound of their voices reached me when I pushed the door open. Any other time that would have been a welcome sound. I dropped my shoulder bag on the counter and crossed through the small, rarely used kitchen to the living room. Arys’s house was small but cozy. He had the blinds tightly drawn to keep out the sun, but a tall flood lamp bathed the room in a warm glow, creating the illusion of early evening rather than early morning.

Arys was the picture of comfort in a recliner, clad only in a pair of red and black checker pajama pants. Shaz stood stiffly in the center of the room, as if he’d stopped mid-pace. Our eyes met, and something crumbled inside me.

The carefully constructed neutral expression he forced did nothing to hide the pain and anguish in his jade gaze. He had promised this wouldn’t break us, but it was, I could feel it.

“Hey,” he said, and that one simple word was loaded with emotion.

So many things threatened to spill forth in a torrent of rushed desperation. It took a moment for me to sort my thoughts. “We need to talk.”

“Look, Alexa. You had every right to do what you did tonight. But, I don’t want to see a repeat of that.” Shaz paused, running a hand through his hair, a nervous gesture. “And, I don’t want to see that agony in your eyes every time you look at me.”

“You should have killed her,” Arys interjected. He shot me a direct look, one that clearly stated he expected me to do just that. “It wouldn’t hurt to make an example of somebody.”

Choosing not to address Arys’s comment, I kept my focus on my white wolf. It broke my heart to look at him, feeling this wall growing between us.

“You have every right to make your own choices, Shaz. I can’t stop you from being with her or anyone else. But, I don’t want to watch you lose yourself in that world. You don’t belong there.”

“I know,” he agreed, his steady gaze wavered. He looked down at the floor, studying the carpet at his feet. “There was a time when I believed that you didn’t belong there either.”

“I don’t.” My stomach was floaty and twisted. I felt ill. “I don’t want to.”

“But, you do. I saw what you did tonight. It proves more than anything that you belong in that world.”

The silence was deafening. Arys looked back and forth between us but said nothing. A series of memories swarmed me: Shaz and I when we were both still so new and raw as werewolves. Back then, we had sought comfort in one another, and I’d believed it was the worst life was going to get.

“I just want you to be happy.”

Shaz looked at me sharply. His eyes flashed with anger. “I want us both to be happy. But, you had to go do something stupid, and then I did something just as stupid. This isn’t the way it was supposed to be.”

It wasn’t. Life in our small town had allowed us both to harbor picket fence dreams. With the forest blanketing the edge of town, Stony Plain was perfect for us, but I’d always known that idyllic life would never be mine.

“I know.” I stood there with them staring at me, feeling put on the spot.

Without budging from his comfy chair, Arys drew our attention with a raised hand. “I think you two are making this out to be a bigger issue than it needs to be. It’s a less than pleasant situation driven by human nature. You have to let it go. And, staying away from The Wicked Kiss wouldn’t be a bad idea. For both of you.”

A muscle twitched in Shaz’s clenched jaw. “Let it go? Seriously? This coming from the man who is probably the most jealous, possessive one of the three of us. Funny, Arys.”

Arys smiled, a sensual flash of fang. “This isn’t about me. You’re both hurting, filled with remorse, jealousy and forbidden desires. Well… welcome to life. Never has a pair of devoted lovers walked this earth without facing their share of trials and tribulations. Why do you think wedding vows have all that for better or for worse stuff? Get over it or give up. There are no other options.”

Couldn’t argue with that. I knew he was right. That damn vampire was almost always right. I’d never admit it too readily, though.

Shaz nodded his platinum head and shuffled his feet. “I’m not willing to give up.” To me he said, “Are you?”

“No.” I didn’t have to think about it. “Not a chance.”

“Alright then.” Arys nodded approvingly and gestured to each of us with a hand. “I now pronounce you both over it. A month of the two of you brooding is more than enough. Precious wasted time, you know.” Casting his dark blue gaze on Shaz, he added with a grin, “Now kiss your woman and make it official.”

A boyish smile graced Shaz’s lips, and I adored him just a little bit more. He was so special. My emotions surged when he obeyed Arys and crossed the room to pull me into his arms.

His kiss was tender but restrained. I could feel his uncertainty, the same fearful doubt I felt. Scents of The Wicked Kiss lingered faintly on him, but beneath that was the heady aroma of wolf and Shaz. It transported me to a place where the forest embraced us and the moon was our only master. I longed for the pure simplicity of the wolf’s world.