Burn (Songs of Submission #5)(23)

Men.

“Boxes arrived this afternoon,” he said.

“Have you heard from Kev?” I assumed he wasn’t invited to Hotel Fancypants, and he’d need to know where we were.

“Nope.”

“I’ll arrange food sent up to your rooms, and an early wake up call,” Jonathan said. “When’s the earliest you can get in for set up?”

“Seven,” I said. “It’s gotta be done in time for the preview at four.”

“It’s tight,” Darren said.

“And we have zero experience doing this kind of thing, so Kevin needs a wake up call, too.” I kicked Darren. “That’s you.”

I noticed Jonathan’s silence, but I didn’t look over. I didn’t want to see his reaction.

Hotel C looked like all of Jonathan’s hotels, a sleek, modern building no one would mistake for home. The long front drive had a marble fountain, and the entire hotel seemed to be made of glass and steel. Staff descended upon us immediately with Mister Drazen this and Ma’am and Sir that. Darren stayed outside to manage the equipment unloading. We got through the door and entered a lobby done in black and brown, wood and matte surfaces, with a cement floor and warehouse ceilings. A woman with her brown hair in a French twist and a black leather skirt handed Jonathan a clipboard. She looked lovely despite the fact that it was after ten p.m.

“Mister Drazen, happy to see you back.”

“Thanks, Marsha. Can you call Kristin for tomorrow’s meetings please? There were some changes.”

“Of course.”

“Should we go check in?” I asked Jonathan, who was signing a bunch of papers.

“Done already.”

“Must be nice.”

“I admit it,” he said as he handed the clipboard back to Marsha with a smile. “It is. Where’s Darren?”

“Getting the processor and mixer out. His life is those computers.”

“Are you and I having a drink before bed?”

A drink. I’d agree to anything after a drink. I’d beg for anything, even without it, and he’d deny me just to make a point. “I’m wiped out.”

“Come on then. Marsha will sort Darren out.”

I looked back at my friend and found him talking to Marsha earnestly while indicating equipment. My guess was he wanted to take it up himself and sleep on top of it, and she wanted to put it in with hotel security. That argument could go on indefinitely.

A man appeared behind Jonathan. “Mister Drazen?”

“Anthony.”

“Can I help you with anything? Take you up to your room? Get you a table at the bar?”

Jonathan turned to me and asked, “Do you need something to eat?”

I didn’t answer right away. I don’t know what my expression said, but something about it caused Jonathan to turn to Anthony and say, “We’ll let you know.”

“Very good, sir.” He spun on his heel and walked away.

“What is it, Monica?”

“I have a problem.”

“Say it.”

“I know I’m tired and hungry, and I have a lot to do tomorrow. But I can’t play this game with you. I’m not good at it. I want you. I want to be naked with you right now. The fact that I’m this close to you and I can smell you, feel you, hear you… Fuck, I’m going crazy.”

“It’s entirely reciprocated.”

“You don’t look like you’re going nuts.”

“Self-control. That’s all it is.”

“I can’t sit across a table from you. I barely made it through the plane ride. The past few weeks have been dead for me. My body shut off. Then you came along. I want it shut off again because I’ll agree to anything right now.”

He leaned into me, not touching, his hands in his pockets. “I’ll only let you commit to me if you mean it. I won’t let you make a mistake because I won’t tolerate you walking away again.”

I leaned toward him a little. I felt the warmth of his breath, and his open jacket brushed my shoulder. “That first time we met, in your office, I threatened you with a lawsuit.”

“You floored me.”

“You handed me Sam’s card. I brushed your finger with mine.”

“Yes.”

“I wish I hadn’t done it,” I said. “I wish I’d just walked out.”

“It was too late way before that.”

“I need to go to my room alone. And I need to not know where you are.”

He smiled. “I’m right next door to you.”

“I just told you not to tell me.”

He chuckled and shrugged.

Darren came up to us, a valet rolling the hardcase behind him.

“I have some things to do here,” Jonathan said. “I’ll have Anthony show you to your rooms.”

With that, he strode off to meet Marsha by the counter.

“Handsome guy, I’ll admit,” Darren said as we watched Jonathan move across the floor as if he owned the joint. “And not half the ass**le.”

“But Kevin’s better?”

Darren shrugged. “Kevin’s my friend at this point. And so are you. So for me, it seems natural.”