Breathe (Sea Breeze #1)(62)
I licked my very dry lips and smiled. “Thank you for being here, now. I fought the darkness so hard because I kept hearing something. It was music. I remember thinking the sound of it made me warm inside. I fought so hard to get close to it. Now I know it was you. If you hadn’t been here singing to me I don’t know if I would have fought at all.”
He closed his eyes for a minute, and pain flickered across his face. “I’ve had a lot of time to think about you and me. I know my life is not normal, and I can’t be the boy who sits behind you in class, no matter how appealing that sounds, but I can’t walk away again. I’m not that strong.” He moved closer to me and touched my face with his other hand. “If you still want me, I’m yours. Your life will never be normal. You will be put in a spotlight, although I am going to keep you as safe as possible. But here’s the thing, I didn’t get to go to high school. I missed out on all my experiences because I was on the road touring. I can’t do that to you. I need you to get every experience high school has to offer, and enjoy it...for me. I will come back to my summer house one week out of every month, and any other time I can squeeze in. I know my schedule is crazy right now with the tour, but I'm going to make this work. I swear.”
I lay there, trying to comprehend his words and knowing I would do anything to have him back in my life. I didn’t care anymore if my privacy was invaded, if I had him, it wouldn’t matter.
“What experiences are there for me in high school? I hate it.”
He smiled and traced my cheekbone with his finger. “Well, there are football games and dances and being picked on in the hallway. There is bad cafeteria food and field trips and, heck, I don’t know I missed it all. I just don’t want you to turn back one day and wish you had lived through it. Because when you did, it would be my fault. I’m asking you to give up so much to be with me. I can’t take everything.”
I sighed. “But all those things I never do. I never go to football games, and I am not going to any dances. Sam needs me.”
Jax shook his head. “No, when Jessica gets home, Sam is going to have a mother, not a big sister, caring for him. I am in communication with her doctor, and he says she is much better, but she was in a very bad state.”
Relief washed through me. To know Jessica would be returning to her normal self sounded wonderful. Being a mom at seventeen had almost killed me, and I needed her to be one for Sam.
“I still have no desire to do those things.”
He grinned wickedly. “How about doing them for me?”
I sighed and closed my eyes, wishing he was asking anything of me but this. Finally, I opened my eyes and nodded. “Okay, for you.”
He broke into a huge grin, leaned forward, and kissed my lips softly. “Thank you,” he whispered before sitting back down.
“Ms. Mary is in the waiting room dying to see you, and so is...um…Marcus,” he finished reluctantly.
I smiled and squeezed his hand. “Marcus has been a wonderful friend through everything.”
Jax nodded. “Yeah, he made sure to threaten my life if I hurt you again. Then he gave me a very descriptive recap of what happened after I left.” Jax swallowed hard and looked away. “Because I owe him for being what I couldn’t be, I am allowing him in here.”
I smiled as Jax stood and turned for the door.
“However, if he so much as goes near your face with his lips, all bets are off.”
I laughed, and Jax gave me one last sexy grin before walking out the door to get my friends.
Ms. Mary entered first with the anxious frown of a worried mother on her face. “Oh, Sadie, honey, I am so glad to see those eyes. Girl, you have given me the scare of my life. Lord, if I had known things were so bad I would have done something.” She touched my hand, leaned down, and kissed my forehead.
“I’m fine now. How’s Sam?”
She smiled and sat down beside me in the chair Jax had been in earlier. “He is wonderful. I started him on some rice cereal, and he is sleeping all night long now. He is such a happy baby.”
“Thank you, so much. I don’t have to worry about him when I know he is with you. It means a lot that you’re taking care of him.” Tears stung my eyes.
“I wouldn’t have it any other way. Sadie, honey, you’re my family now too. I love you just like I do my own kids. Don’t you go thanking me for nothing.”
At her words, the tears spilled over. I had a family now. It had always been me and Jessica against the world, but now I had others to love and who loved me back.
“Oh, lordy, if Master Jax catches you crying, he is gonna shoo me out of here for good. Stop that now. You got Marcus outside with Jax, and the way they are glaring at each other, it won’t be long before we have a fight on our hands. I’m gonna go.” She squeezed my hand. “I’m so happy you came back to us, sweetie. You’re very loved.” She turned to leave.
“Ms. Mary.”
She stopped and said, “Yes, honey?”
I smiled through my tears. “I love you too.”
She sniffed and wiped a tear from her eye. “I know you do, girl, I know you do.” She walked out of the room.
Jax stepped back inside and frowned at me, concerned. “Are you all right? Ms. Mary is crying, and so are you.” He came over and wiped the tears from my face.