Breathe (Sea Breeze #1)(41)

Jax didn’t take my mother’s decision well, but he accepted it. Saying goodbye even for a little while made my chest hurt. I dreaded it all day. If this was what it felt like to watch him leave for a short time, how much worse would September be? I heard him walk up behind me before he said anything. I stood up from my work with the roses and turned to him. He looked like someone out of a magazine, and I fought the urge to reach out and grab him and hold onto the Jax I loved, not this stranger standing before me.

He reached out, took my hand, and slipped my garden glove off. “I already miss you,” he said as he began kissing my fingers. “This is going to be two very long days.”

I forced myself to smile. “It will be over before we know it.”

He frowned and pulled me closer. “God help me if they ask me to sing a love song. I don’t know if I’ll be able to get through the lyrics.”

I smiled and reached up to run my fingers through his thick, dark hair. “You’ll have them all eating out of the palm of your hand. All you have to do is smile.”

He grinned. “I think you’re a little biased.”

I laughed. “No, I’m not. I’ve witnessed you charming a room full of girls with one simple smile.”

He frowned and leaned down to kiss my cheek, and then kissed a trail to my ear before whispering, “You’re the only one I care about charming.”

I sighed. “Well, don’t worry, I’m completely charmed.”

He leaned back and reached into his pocket. “I have something for you, but it is really for me. I need you to take it, so I will be able to get some rest while I am away.”

He held a slim, flat cell phone in his hand.

“Please keep it on and with you at all times, so I can hear your voice whenever I need you.” Somehow he managed to say the only words that would make me take a gift like this

from him.

“I don’t know if I can use it. It seems complicated.”

He grinned. “It’s a touch screen. When you touch the screen, all your necessary buttons appear.”

I did as instructed and the screen came to life. “It’s like the iPod you gave me.”

“That’s because it’s an iPhone.”

I slipped it into my pocket.

“I am just a phone call away.” Jax smiled sadly.

“I hate this.” I didn’t want to make things harder on him, so I made myself smile. “You’ll be back soon.”

He stepped closer and leaned down to kiss me. I didn’t want to close my eyes. I wanted to see him while he made my world spin. The moment his hand traced my face, I lost all concentration and just enjoyed being in his arms. He stepped back and broke the kiss.

“I’ll be back as soon as I can,” he said in a raspy voice.

I liked knowing our kiss affected him. “I know.”

He gave me one more grin and walked away. I watched him until he was almost out of sight. He turned back around and stopped to look at me. He lifted his fingers to his mouth and blew me a kiss before walking around the corner. The slim phone in my pocket reminded me he would call soon, and I would hear his voice. It would have to be enough to get me through.

* * * *

Marcus took me home after work. Jax had left a car to take me home, but I couldn’t bring myself to ride home in his vehicle without him.

“What do I have to do to make you smile?” he asked when we pulled up beside the apartment.

I sighed and forced a smile. “Nothing.”

He leaned back against his seat and closed his eyes. “I hope he knows what he’s got.”

I glanced at my friend, not sure what to say. I dropped my hand from the car door. Apparently he wanted to talk. “I’m the one who has been given something special. Jax isn’t like people think. He is this wonderful guy who is kind and polite and sweet. He makes me laugh and is happy just holding me. In his arms, I feel safe. It’s like I have finally found somewhere I belong.”

Marcus let out a short, hard laugh. “Sadie, holding you isn’t a hardship for him, I can promise you. And how do you know you can’t find all those qualities in someone else. Jax isn’t the only guy on earth who is kind, polite, and sweet.”

“I am sure you’re right. But no guy I have ever met has made my heart go on a frenzy and my skin tingle just by walking into a room. Somehow, he is the only one who has ever been able to touch my soul.”

Marcus sighed and shook his head. “You’re right, it isn’t something just anyone can do to you. It just sucks Jax Stone is the one to make you tingle.”

I let out a small laugh. “I’ll always love him. But I know, soon, I will have to learn to live without him and move on. Right now just isn’t the time.”

Marcus nodded.

I opened the door and got out. “Thanks for the ride.”

He smiled. “Anytime.”

I walked inside. Marcus was a great guy, and if I didn’t love Jax so much, maybe I could feel something for him. But my soul was already taken.

I didn’t want to fall asleep for fear I would miss Jax’s call. I swept the kitchen and scrubbed the bathroom before finally getting in the shower. I left the cell by the sink just in case the phone rang. When I finished, I put on my nightgown, and then I turned to my bed and fought the urge to crawl in. I knew if I did, I would fall asleep. Closing my eyes was out of the question even though they were very heavy. I sat down on the edge of the bed and thought about the likeliness of him calling me tonight. I’d just about convinced myself he wasn’t going to call when I heard Jax singing “Wanted Dead or Alive.” I hadn’t expected a one of a kind ring tone, and I laughed as I answered the phone. “Hello.”