Brazen (Brazen #1)(11)

Finally he rolled away from her, positioning himself so his back was to hers. He stared at his closet door and mentally began ticking off all the reasons why he couldn’t go down this road with Jaz.

He was well into his list when he felt her turn over to face his back.

“Zane?”

He tensed. “Yes, honey?”

She hesitated for a moment. “You remember the night in the bar?”

That had his full attention. He reached up to turn the light back on then rolled back over until he faced her. She looked at him with uncertain eyes.

“I remember.”

She licked her lips, and her gaze darted away from his face. He didn’t move, didn’t breathe. Though he and Seth were well aware of what had happened at the bar and the reasons behind it, the events leading up to it were very much a mystery. Jaz had never talked about it, and they’d never pressed her.

“The man who expected me to prostitute myself, to work for him…I didn’t agree at first. I was desperate. I had no place to go. No money. No food. But the idea of selling myself to strangers for sex scared me worse than the thought of living out on the streets. So I told him no.”

Zane studied her face as agony worked its way across her brow, crinkling her eyebrows and locking fear into her eyes. He wanted to reach out and erase it, tell her that nothing would ever threaten her again.

“And what did he do?” Zane prompted.

Her pupils dilated, and her breathing became more erratic. “He shoved me into a hot tub and held me under. Just when I thought I’d surely pass out, he’d pull me out, let me catch my breath, then do it all over again.”

Zane closed his eyes as every single muscle in his body went rigid with anger. Goddamn, mother f**king son of a bitch!

“He wouldn’t stop until I agreed to do what he wanted.” Her voice caught on a quiet sob, and he felt the sound all the way to his soul. “I was such a mess, scared out of my mind, scared that I was going to die. I would have agreed to anything.”

No longer able to keep from touching her, he reached across the space between them and pulled her into his arms. She buried her face in his chest, and he could feel her shudder against him.

“It’s stupid, I know,” she said, her voice muffled by his body.

He let her go just enough that she could breathe and he could hear her more clearly.

“I wouldn’t even take baths after that. Still won’t. If there’s more than a few inches of water, the mere idea of it covering me…”

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me, Jaz.” He rubbed his hands over her back, up and down, wanting to comfort her in any way possible. “Fear is inexplicable, and I don’t blame you for being terrified of the water after going through that.”

“That’s only part of my nightmare,” she admitted.

He tugged at the strands of her hair, moving them from her face and tucking them behind her ear. “What’s the other part?”

She gazed at him, eyes shining with unshed tears. Then one slipped over the rim and trickled down her cheek. He wanted to kiss it away. Wanted to kiss her eyelids. Instead, he gently thumbed the wetness away and waited for her to continue.

“Sometimes I think about what would have happened if I hadn’t met you and Seth in the bar that night. If it had been someone else.”

Her voice broke and the last few words came out in a shaky exhalation. She opened her mouth as if to explain further, but she swallowed and looked away again as another tear slid rapidly down her cheek.

“Oh, baby,” he said around the ache in his throat.

He ignored the voice inside that warned him to keep his distance. Ignored the idea that he should have sent her back to bed as soon as she’d shown up in his room.

He ran his fingertips over her cheeks, swiping at her tears as he leaned his head in. He caught her gasp of surprise as he touched his lips to hers.

Sweet. Exotic. Liquid heat exploded between them. As much as he’d been dying to taste her since she’d kissed him in the airport, nothing had prepared him for the reality.

Her lips moved over his, seeking, opening for him. He swiped over her tongue, and his initial intent of offering comfort flew out the window as her hands crept over his stomach to his chest. This went beyond comfort. He needed, wanted, ached.

Christ.

What the hell was he doing? She trusted him. She depended on him. And all he could think about doing was peeling her shirt off and loving every inch of her delectable body.

He pulled away, sucking in several steadying breaths. He willed his pulse to settle before his heart exploded right out of his chest. He was as hard as a rock, a fact that shamed him. He tugged the covers so that his erection was disguised by the sheets and shifted to try and alleviate his growing discomfort.

“Jaz,” he began, hoping like hell to divert his focus away from her swollen mouth, because it was far too easy to imagine it closed around his cock. “Did you never think about going back home?”

He wanted to recall the question. It was stupid. But it was the first thing that had popped out in his quest to cover the awkward moment. She’d told him and Seth enough that they knew home hadn’t been a happy place. But surely it would have beat life on the streets?

Sadness shadowed her eyes, dulling them. “I didn’t have a home anymore.”

He nudged her chin upwards, wanting to open the door further into her past. “Why not?”