Avoiding Commitment (Avoiding #1)(63)

"I'm not self-conscious," she whined. "I just...don't want everyone to hear."

"You don't want Jack to hear?" he asked pointedly.

"I don't see how that has anything to do with it," she stated her voicing coming out faulty.

"Look Lexi I know you said that you took my words to heart and that you guys are going to be better and all that. But I just have a really bad feeling about all of this," he said honestly.

She quickly took the defensive. "What are you saying Clark? Do you think that I'd do something?"

"No, I didn't say that."

"Then what are you saying?"

"Baby, I trust you." He took her hands in his and looked into her big brown eyes. "I just don't trust him. I don't think if he were given the chance that he'd be able to stay away from you."

"And what, I'm just going to sit by and let this happen?" she asked her defensive anger getting the best of her. She had done just that so many times before.

"I'm not saying that either. Stop putting words in my mouth. I'm not trying to start a fight with you," Clark said calmly. "I just have a bad feeling. I was hoping you would reassure me that my feelings are just misguided judgments of a jealous demented boyfriend," he said looking up at her pleadingly.

"Well, I agree with you at least about Jack. I'm not sure if he's ever been faithful with anyone he's been with. But that's the reason that you shouldn't be concerned," she said feeling the lie start to form on her tongue. "Why would I let him get to me knowing that?" She really wanted the answer to that question.

He just shook his head. "I dunno Lexi, but I hope you're right."

"You know me better than that," she said snuggling closer to him.

"You're right. I do. I love you Lexi."

She gulped. "I love you too."

All throughout dinner Lexi remained aloof and withdrawn from the group. Her conversation with Clark echoed in her ears. She couldn't help wondering if she should tell Clark that Jack had kissed her. But if she did that, then she would have to tell him about going out on the beach with Jack. She would have to explain why she had continued to meet him on the beach after that first night. She wasn't sure that she would be able to do that. Sure they had said they were going to just be friends, but she wasn't an idiot. They wouldn't be sneaking off together every night if they were just friends. After everything that had happened between them, Lexi was pretty certain that they could never just be friends.

"You sure you don't want to join me? I'm sure you would sleep better in my arms," Clark persuaded hugging her tightly around the middle outside of her bedroom.

"Rain check. I'm really beat," she said nuzzling into his arm. She was really tired. That was the true part of the statement. The only problem was she wouldn't be sleeping again for several hours.

"Alright. If you change your mind, you know where I am."

He kissed her once more and then trotted up the stairs. Lexi breathed a sigh of relief that he hadn't pushed her further on the subject. She quickly ambled into her room. This was the worst part about the night. Waiting. For Sandy to either sneak out of the room to visit Seth or pass out. Waiting. For the sounds of Clark and the guys quieted down and subsiding to slumber. Waiting. For the coast to clear.

After what felt like an eternity, Lexi extracted herself from Sandy's grip and slinked out of the room. She rubbed her tired eyes as she moved into the den. Her smile lit up when she found Jack waiting for her. He could have been asleep. She was the one who waited for the coast to clear before coming to find him. There was no need for him to wait up for her. Those few hours rest were like gold right now, and he had chose to stay up and wait for her instead.

"Miss me?" she asked sitting down next to him on the lumpy light blue sofa.

He yawned in the midst of answering her, "Ohhhhhh…yeaaaaa."

"We should probably get out of here," she said feeling his arm come around her middle and hold her in place. He tilted them backwards so that they were spooning comfortably on the couch. She sighed pleasantly and nestled closer to him. Thoughts of leaving left her as she felt slumber draw close. The soothing feel of Jack's breath hot on her neck caused her eyes to flutter close, and she could feel herself begin to drift off. Then she felt his lips pressed to that same spot on her neck, and all of a sudden she was wide awake. It was only one kiss, but it left her heart speeding ahead of her. She rolled to face him, and met his smoldering gaze. Everything about their embrace in the moment showed that they weren't friends. That they could never be friends. That they were stupid for even trying. All she wanted to do was kiss him. Every nerve in her body was pushing her closer towards him. She had never stopped wanting him as much as she tried to deny the obvious facts. When they were together, she lost all cognitive thought.

Jack moved closer, as if there was any room between them, and she could almost feel his sweet lips on her…almost taste him. A rumbling from upstairs stilled their movement. They waited a second for the noise to die away, but after a few seconds, it returned and stronger.

Lexi swore under her breath. The universe was really trying to keep them apart. Jack smiled at her reaction, but his face was strained.

"What's going on up there?" she whispered to him in the darkness.