Avoiding Commitment (Avoiding #1)(111)
"We can't…I can't do this," she said sliding the shirt back over her head and removing her legs from around his waist. "I told you how we can be together, and I really have to stick with that," she said her breathing ragged and body still pulsing with desire for him. It was one of the hardest things she had ever done, but she knew that she couldn't do this. Not again.
Jack groaned and moved to a sitting position next to her. "Yeah I know. It's just…this is what we're normally like. You're so damn sexy when you get angry. I just can't seem to help myself."
"I know. I didn't want you to help yourself either. I don't want you to have to help your feelings for me, but this isn't fair to Bekah. We've been here before. I don't want another Kate/Clark situation on our hands. It didn't go well the first time, and I have a feeling that it would be just as bad this time around," she told him sadly. Lexi hated so much having to have this conversation. All she wanted right then was to be swept up into his arms and be carried to his bed so they could have hot passionate sex all afternoon. But she couldn't do this again.
"You're right," he said meeting her desirous gaze.
"I'm sorry," she told him shyly. "I do want this terribly bad."
He reached out and caressed her cheek. "I know."
"Well," Jack began awkwardly, "I'm going to go take a cold shower." He stood up uncomfortably adjusting himself. "Feel free to come and go as you please. I really do have a lot of work to catch up on, but I'd love it if you stuck around. I can't seem to get enough of you." He bent down and kissed her forehead sweetly.
Lexi watched him exit the living room. She couldn't believe how close she had come to giving into him. She knew one thing though. She needed Chyna right then. Chyna was the only one who would keep her focused while Jack was taken. She had to give him enough time to deal with Bekah, and allowing him to think that he could have her without doing anything about the situation wasn't going to help her. She needed to stand her ground, but not getting swept up with their desires was a lot of work, and Lexi wasn't prepared for it. That's where Chyna came in. It was too bad Chyna was still hours away, and Jack was currently stripping down naked in the next room preparing to get soaking wet.
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K.A. Linde
Three Small Words
I miss everything about you
Can't believe that I still want you
And after all the things we've been through
I miss everything about you
I see your blue eyes
Every time I close mine
You make it hard to see
Where I belong to
When I'm not around you
- Colbie Caillat "I Never Told You"
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Chapter 18: November One and A Half Years Earlier
A scraping sound followed by shuffling feet across the carpeted floors made Lexi shift from her otherwise comfortable position. She yawned exaggeratedly refusing to open her sleep deprived eyes to the blinding sunlight. Her hand slowly rose above her head and she stretched languidly across the couch. Her back arched pushing the checkered quilt off of her upper-half leaving her frail form exposed with only a flimsy white tank top as a meager cover-up. She shivered convulsively at the near freezing weather and scrambled to cover the rest of her body with the warm material. Yanking the covers up to her chin, she snuggled deeper into the plush cushions. Another yawn escaped her as she wrestled with her own inner turmoil: to study or not to study.
A sharp pain shot across her temples reminding her of the amount of alcohol she had absorbed last night. Memories of shot after shot flooded her conscious, and she knew her answer to that dilemma. There would be no chance she would be studying today. A groan escaped her lips and she shuddered against the pain pulsing throughout her body. Her stomach twisted with nausea and she was certain that she would be sick at any moment. Swallowing down the rising bile in her throat, she groaned even louder this time. A giggle punctuated the early morning air causing Lexi to cringe further into her comfortable niche.
"You gonna get up, you lazy bum?" Rachelle, Lexi's roommate, questioned in her thick New England accent from across the kitchen.
Lexi grumbled angrily into the pillow adding a few choice curse words. "Don't talk so loud Ray," she mumbled pressing her palms to her forehead.
"It's pretty late, and you know we have that huge Civ Pro reading for tomorrow," she drawled slamming the microwave door shut as if for Lexi's benefit. Another giggle resounded throughout the space confirming that sentiment. "I wouldn't want to see my genius roomie getting behind in her class work."
If she had had the energy, Lexi would have flicked her off. Under the circumstances, she just griped louder into the pillow and pulled the covers completely over her head. She let her eyes open and painfully adjust to the feeble amount of light apparent through the blanket. Her mind sifted through the disjointed memories from the previous night focusing in on the high points. Vodka gummis, hot Armani Guy, dancing, leaving with Chyna – Jack. She gasped quietly in the chilly morning air as her brain wrapped around the foreign concept. Had that been a dream?
It felt completely surreal to think that he had been in New York, in her dorm, in her arms. He had come for her. He had confessed his desire – love – for her. He had lain next to her all night.