At Peace (The 'Burg #2)(57)

“I was, um… he went out of town and I wasn’t sure that, um… when he got back that we’d still…”

“Is he back?”

“He got back yesterday.”

“Are you still –?”

“Yeah.”

“I knew it.”

“You did?”

“Girl, a man does not get like he got when those flowers were delivered when it’s nothin’ but a convenient next door booty call.”

“It’s still a booty call.”

“Bullshit.”

“No, he made that clear. It’s just sex.”

I heard a “poof” sound of expelled breath over the phone then, “Yeah, right.”

“Colt got intense when the flowers were delivered too,” I reminded her.

“Yeah, Colt also had the ass**le of all ass**les doing sick f**k crazy ass shit to him and Feb for twenty freakin’ years so he knows your pain like no other.”

Cheryl did too, she was involved in that mess as well, not for twenty years but also not in a good way, not that there was a good way in that mess, except maybe the fact that the crazy guy ended up being riddled with bullets. She’d told me all about it a couple of nights ago. I’d been astonished that she’d pulled it together so fast. It had been over a year ago, but still, she was right. It was “sick f**k crazy ass shit” and she made it to the other side.

Then again, Cheryl had shared other stuff in her life so I got the firm impression she was a fighter.

“Your hot-as-shit, bad boy, player, next door neighbor doesn’t know your pain,” Cheryl went on in my ear. “He’s just goin’ all alpha male when someone f**ks with his woman.”

My heart lurched and I whispered, “I’m not Joe’s woman.”

“Babe, seriously? Wake up.”

“I’m not.”

“All right,” she said, “tell me, how are you not?”

“Well, he hasn’t asked me out on a date,” I started.

“He f**k you?”

“Um… yeah.”

“That’s a date to a guy,” she declared. “Next.”

I started giggling. “Cheryl, really, he’s made no promises.”

“They never do.”

“Tim did.”

“Tim was eighteen, a decent kid and got his bitch pregnant. Only the not-decent guys, like Ethan’s f**khead father, bolt when that shit hits. You lucked out.”

I knew that, boy did I know that.

“Anyway, what else?” Cheryl pushed.

“You met him, I don’t know how he was with you but he’s pretty straight and he made it clear. His truck is in the drive, I’m welcome in his bed. Other than that, no go. I’ve asked him over for dinner, pancakes, even the girls asked him over for dinner. He never showed.”

“He took you to the mall.”

“He got shang hai’ed by Keira.”

“Girl, you been off the market way too long. You marry a man, he’s lawfully bound to drag his ass to the mall with you. Your girl is cute and she’s sweet and she’s funny but there is no f**kin’ man on this f**kin’ earth who goes to a f**kin’ mall unless there’s someone he wants to be with while he’s there or there’s some shit hot sale on TVs. A sweet, cute, funny teenage girl asks him or not. And that’s the God’s honest truth.”

I licked my lips and thought about last night. I thought about how Joe met me on the deck like he was waiting for me to come over, as anxious to see me after a week and a half as I was to see him. I thought about how Joe walked back to my house to make it safer for my girls. I thought about that whole sad, crazy, ugly drama with his sad, scary, drunk-and-high ex-wife and how he was and how he let me be with him after. I thought about how he wanted me to walk home in his t-shirt. If that didn’t make a statement, him giving me his clothes, even demanding I wear them, nothing did. And I thought about what Cheryl was saying.

And I could not go there again.

“Cheryl,” I said softly, “I can’t go there again.”

“Babe –”

“No, I just can’t. Okay? This is what it is, all it is, and I’m cool with that now that I know what it is. I live my life and I’m not alone some of the time and the sex is fantastic and I can take only that. Something else comes along then it comes along. Joe’ll deal.”

“Something else comes along, Joe’s f**kin’ head will explode.”

I wasn’t sure that was true. I wasn’t sure that Joe wouldn’t shrug, say, “Enjoy your life, buddy,” and walk away. I wasn’t sure of that at all.

So I needed to stay right where I was and not go there again.

“Can we stop talking about this?”

Cheryl was silent then she asked, “You comin’ out with me tonight?”

I couldn’t go over to Joe’s until the girls were asleep anyway so I said, “Yeah, sure, sounds fun.”

“It’ll be a blast. Meet you there at, say, eight thirty?”

“Great.”

“Cool, see you then and… dress down, babe, I don’t need the competition.”

“Shut up, you’re gorgeous.”