Anathema (Causal Enchantment #1)(72)

I felt the nervous flutter in my stomach as I heard him say those words but I quickly reprimanded myself, sure that I was reading too much into it. He had to be talking about someone else. I remained silent.

“That night you were bitten … if she had ever found out what had happened, she would have torn through me to get to you.”

“But you had no other choice,” I said defensively.

He chuckled to himself. “I suppose not,” he whispered, looking at me strangely. “That’s why I was so cold to you today. It’s getting so much harder to pretend. I was afraid she’d see right through me.” He pushed my hair away from my face then, those gorgeous jade eyes gazing adoringly at me. “I knew … the moment I laid eyes on you, I knew.” His hands slid down my arms to twine his fingers with mine. He pulled my hands behind my back, forcing me closer to him.

Butterflies the size of bats began madly flapping around in my stomach, flying at warp speed. Am I imagining things? I swallowed. Is this impossibly beautiful man telling me what I think he is? “So that means you’re not with Rachel, right? You don’t love her, after all,” I whispered, needing to hear him say it.

“No, not her. I don’t love her.” He buried his face in my neck, inhaling deeply. “I thought you would have figured it out by now. I promised myself I wouldn’t tell you anything, for your sake. It’s safer to keep you in the dark, given Rachel, with you being human, with you being from another world …” he went on, naming all the obvious obstacles. “But that’s not possible anymore,” he said, pulling away to gaze down at me again, his face solemn, “with you attacking me that morning and all.”

“I didn’t attack you,” I stammered, embarrassed.

The corners of Caden’s mouth twitched. He’s teasing. “I don’t know what came over me,” I admitted sheepishly.

“And I thought you were reserved,” he quipped.

We stood there, silently staring at each other. The urge to lean forward and “attack” him again became unbearable. But I wasn’t going to initiate it this time. So I stood there, trembling in anticipation.

He let out a loud sigh and dropped my hands to slowly back away from me. “I shouldn’t be doing this.” He dipped his head to study the ground. When it lifted again, his face had gone stony. “I meant what I said about you and I being impossible, but I wanted you to understand why.”

My mind was reeling with the sudden change in direction. “What … what does that mean?”

Caden heaved another resigned sigh and leaned against the cave wall. “It means we continue doing what we’ve been doing, pretending this conversation didn’t happen. That these feelings don’t exist.”

“Why? What do you mean? I can’t sit around and watch you being pawed by that she–devil!” I said, my eyes narrowed with incredulity. How could he even suggest such a thing?

“Don’t worry about me. I can handle it.”

“I bet,” I grumbled, suddenly realizing that a beautiful seductress throwing herself at a guy, willing to do God–knows–what, wasn’t exactly the worst punishment in the world.

His eyes flickered with recognition at my insinuation. “Hey, if you have a better idea, I’m all ears,” he snapped. But he quickly apologized, adding, “The only way any of that is bearable is because I’m imagining you.”

I felt myself blush furiously, a strange sensation stirring within me. “So what now?”

“Now we get out of this cave,” Caden said softly, wincing.

It hit me then. “Merth!”

“Yeah, it hurts.”

“No! I mean, we can bind her in it.”

“No, ‘we’ can’t because ‘we’ can’t touch it,” he explained patiently.

“I can, though,” I began, but he was already shaking his head furiously.

“Not a chance. It’s too dangerous.”

“But I could—”

“No!” Caden yelled, then clenched his jaw tightly again.

I shrank back.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean that. This was what I was worried about—why I didn’t tell you how I felt in the first place. It’s going to be hard enough to ignore each other. I can’t be worrying about you pulling any insane stunts with her. What you did today, lying to her like that—it was stupid. Impressive, but stupid. She’s the most dangerous, wicked creature you will ever face in your life, and I’d like that to be a long life.”

My anger flared. “Then maybe you shouldn’t have run off into the woods to pick flowers, and been so damn flirtatious!” I snapped back at him.

He smirked. “I thought getting angry was pointless.” That only infuriated me more. “I’ve never seen you angry. It’s endearing.” He smiled adoringly at me. The smile only lasted a second, though, fading as he stepped in closer to me. “I know … I shouldn’t have. But I couldn’t help myself. I’m not much better than any other vampire out there.”

“No, you’re different,” I whispered with stoic conviction.

“That’s because this pendant is protecting you, Evangeline,” Caden lectured softly, reaching up to run his finger along the silver chain, grazing my collarbone and sending shivers through my body. “Believe me, things would be different otherwise.”