All These Things I've Done (Birthright #1)(62)

I knocked on the door. ‘Come in, Anya,’ Imogen whispered. ‘She told me to wake her before you left. Wake up, Galina. It’s Annie.’

My grandmother woke. She coughed for a while and then Imogen slipped a straw into her mouth. I looked over at Win to see if he was repulsed by poor Nana, but his eyes betrayed nothing. They looked, if anything, as kind as usual, and slightly concerned.

‘Hi, Nana,’ I said. ‘We’re about to leave for the wedding.’

Nana nodded.

‘This is my boyfriend, Win,’ I said. ‘You said you wanted to meet him.’

‘Ah yes.’ Nana looked Win up and down. ‘I approve,’ she said finally. ‘I approve of your looks, I mean. I certainly hope there is more to you than your pretty face. This’ – she nodded towards me – ‘this one is a very good girl, and she deserves more than a pretty face.’

‘I agree,’ Win said. ‘Nice to meet you, too.’

‘Is that what you’re wearing to the wedding?’ Nana asked me.

I nodded. I had on a dark grey suit, which had been my mother’s. Win had brought me a white orchid, and I had pinned it to my lapel.

‘It’s a bit severe, but the cut flatters your figure. You look lovely, Anyaschka. I like the flower.’

‘Win gave it to me.’

‘Hmmph,’ she said. ‘OMG, the young man has taste.’ She turned her attention to Win. ‘Do you know what OMG stands for, young man?’

Win shook his head.

Nana looked at me. ‘Do you?’

Scarlet’s word. ‘Amazing or something,’ I replied. ‘I always meant to ask you.’

‘Oh my God,’ Nana said. ‘Life used to move much more quickly when I was a girl. We needed to abbreviate just to keep up.’

‘OMG,’ Win said.

‘Would you believe that I looked like Anya once upon a time?’

‘Yes,’ Win said. ‘I can see that.’

‘She was prettier,’ I said.

Nana told him to come closer, and Win obeyed. She whispered something in his ear, and Win nodded. ‘Yes,’ he said. ‘Yes, of course.’

‘Have a good time, Anyaschka. Dance with your pretty boyfriend for me, and give everyone my best.’

I leaned down to kiss her on the cheek. She grabbed my hand and said, ‘You have been a wonderful granddaughter. An honour to your parents. God sees everything, my darling. Even and maybe especially what the world does not. I wish that I could have been stronger for you. Always remember that you are powerful beyond measure. This power is your birthright. Your only birthright! Do you understand? I need to know that you understand!’

Her eyes were teary, so I told her that I did understand, though, in point of fact, I didn’t. Her speech seemed rambling and incoherent, and I assumed she was beginning another one of her less lucid periods. I didn’t want her to slap me in front of Win and Imogen. ‘I love you, Nana,’ I said.

‘I love you, too,’ she said, and then she started to cough. The coughs seemed more violent than usual, almost as if she were choking. ‘Go!’ she managed to yell.

Imogen massaged my grandmother’s chest with her palm, and Nana’s coughing subsided somewhat.

I asked Imogen if she needed my help.

‘We’re fine, Annie. Her lungs have been bothering her from the cold. It’s very ordinary for someone in your grandmother’s condition.’ Imogen continued to work on Nana’s chest.

‘Get out of here!’ Nana yelled between coughs.

I grabbed Win’s hand and we left.

I whispered to him, ‘I’m sorry. Sometimes she gets confused.’

Win said he understood and that there was no need to apologize. ‘She’s old.’

I nodded. ‘It’s hard to imagine ever being that age.’

Win asked what year she was born, and I told him 1995, that she’d be eighty-eight that spring. ‘Before the turn of the century,’ Win said. ‘Not many people that age left.’

I thought of Nana as a little girl and as a teenager and as a young woman. I wondered what type of clothes she wore, what books she read, what boys she liked. I doubt she thought she’d outlive her only biological son, that some day she’d be an old woman in a bed – powerless and confused and a little grotesque. ‘I don’t ever want to be that old,’ I said.

‘Yes,’ Win agreed. ‘Let’s stay young forever. Young, stupid and pretty. Sounds like a plan, don’t you think?’

The wedding was elaborate, as was typical of my family. Golden table linens, a band, and someone had even managed to obtain (read: bribe someone for) additional flower and meat vouchers for the occasion. The bride’s dress was too big through the waist, but her veil was intricately embroidered and even looked new. Her name was Sophia Bitter, and I knew nothing about her. In terms of looks, it’s mean to say, but she was remarkable only in her plainness. She had limp brown hair, a long horsey nose, and she couldn’t have been much older than me. When she said, ‘I do,’ it was with an accent of some kind. Her mother and sisters wept for the entire length of the ceremony.

Natty was seated at the kids’ table among our cousins. Leo was placed with several of his colleagues from the Pool and their wives and girlfriends. Win and I were at a table of loose ends – not a family table, not children, just people who didn’t fit in anywhere else.