A Castle of Sand (A Shade of Vampire #3)(36)

I bit my lip anticipating the pain that was sure to come. Then nothing.

After a moment’s silence, Derek began to swear. “Sofia…” he choked, as he helped me to my feet. “What have I done? I’m so sorry. Sofia, I…”

“I’m alright. I’m not hurt.”

He stared at me like I was a precious ornament that he’d just broken.

“Derek…”

Before I could say anything, he had his lips on mine, kissing me like he hadn’t in a long time. Demanding. Passionate. Hungry. It’s like he poured out every pent up emotion he had into that one kiss. I could feel my knees weaken beneath me, making me lean my entire weight on me, realizing just how much I missed the security of his arms around me.

When our lips parted, we stared at each other for a few moments. I could sense the guilt he was feeling. I knew Derek. I knew that he was beating himself up over what had just occurred.

“I love you,” I assured him. “Nothing’s changed.”

A bitter smile formed on his face as he nodded. “That just makes me feel more like a monster, Sofia. Like I don’t deserve you.”

He walked away and just as I was about to hold him back, he used his lightning speed to get away from me.

I stood rooted to my spot staring at the direction he went off to for a few minutes, wondering if I should follow him. When I was about to make a run for where I thought he was headed, Gavin held me back.

“Let him go. There’s no way you can catch up with him.”

“I think I know where he went.” The Lighthouse. I realized then that I had no idea how to get to the Lighthouse without Derek. There was no way I could make the hundred-foot leap down the fortress without him. I looked Gavin’s way. I had actually forgotten he was there for a while. I sighed. He looked nothing like my best friend, but he reminded me so much of Ben and how easygoing things were when I was around him. This time, however, Gavin was looking at me in a different way—like he was in a daze, blinking several times in disbelief.

“I’ve never seen anything like that,” he finally spoke, amazement evident in his voice.

“Anything like what?” I asked.

“That! Sofia, the way you get to him…it’s amazing. What were you humming? Will it work on all vamps?”

“It was a tune Derek made up on my birthday. We danced to it while were at the…” I caught myself, remembering that no one apart from me and Derek knew about the Lighthouse. I creased my brows at Gavin and quickly changed the subject. “Can’t everybody do that? Calm a vampire?”

“Calm a vampire?!” Gavin spat the words out like it was the most laughable thing he’d ever heard of. He shook his head profusely as he snickered. “No…not everybody can do that. When a vampire loses it, they lose it. Of all the years I’ve been here, I’ve never seen a human survive a vampire attack unscathed or unbitten when the vampire goes into blackouts. The vampire attacks, destroys, ruins. Only their own kind can stop them, and it’s usually through bloody violence, but you…” He stared at me like I was the most magical thing he’d ever laid eyes on. “It’s like you put a spell on him. How did you do it?”

“I don’t know.” I shook my head, still feeling the longing ache I had for Derek. “I just matter to him I guess.”

“That’s really what amazes me. Why do you matter that much? What do you have on him?”

I ask myself the same question every day. I hated the idea that I could be important to him only because of the prophecy or the fact that Vivienne lost her life in exchange for mine—thus, securing my value in Derek’s eyes. “We’re in love,” was the only answer I could think of that would satisfy my own insecurities and doubts about why Derek wanted me around.

“Yeah? Well, I hope the love lasts. We could use someone among us capable of taming the prince…”

At that, it was my turn to scoff. “Derek isn’t some beast that ought to be tamed.” I was surprised at my own indignation. The word just rubbed me the wrong way, because it reminded me of Ben calling himself my Prince Charming and me his Rose Red, only for me to end up with the Beast. “Derek is many things, but he isn’t a monster.”

“Sure. If you say so.” Gavin lightly chuckled. He crossed his arms over his chest, both of us still looking in the direction where Derek went off. “Remind me again why you’re avoiding him…”

I gave Gavin a long, thoughtful look before deciding that I could trust him with what I knew. “I think this is something we ought to talk about in private.”

We ended up meandering along the woods—not the safest place for humans at The Shade—on a long route to The Catacombs. That’s where I hesitantly told Gavin about the plan to have another culling.

Most of the walk consisted of a question asked and answered, then immediately followed by a long, tense silence, before another question could be asked. By the time we reached The Catacombs, both of us were heartbroken.

We were already on the level of The Catacombs below where my quarters were when a beautiful young woman with black hair, pale skin and stunning moss green eyes approached Gavin.

“Hi, Gavin…” she greeted shyly as she fidgeted with her fingers.

Gavin’s sharp eyes softened at the sight of her. “Hello, Anna…how’ve you been?” he asked in a manner so patronizing, it was almost as if he was talking to a child.