A Blaze of Sun (A Shade of Vampire #5)(60)

Since I left The Shade, I stopped putting upon myself the spell that was keeping me young and immortal. When I arrived at the Elder’s castle, I was an old, decrepit woman, ready to become whatever I needed in order to be Derek’s.

The deal was struck. The Elder asked me what kind of woman Derek was attracted to. I described what I knew Derek’s ideal was, based on my observations, the women I saw him gravitate towards and the conversations I had with him. The Elder smiled. “I can do that,” he said, “but it will take time.”

He turned me into Emilia, his daughter, a vampire, that night. And since then, I slowly transformed from the old Cora to the beautiful, young and vibrant Emilia. I looked forward to the day Derek would be mine. In the meantime, I had to follow my father’s every beck and call... and with every command that I followed, I lost a part of my soul.

I blinked back the tears as I set my eyes on Derek even as the Elder’s presence hovered over me.

“You gave up your goodness in order to match his darkness only to find that you came too late. He woke up and discovered his goodness in the form of Sofia. Bring him back to the darkness, Emilia, or I will make sure that you will never see Derek again. I will find a way to completely destroy him.”

Chapter 36: Derek

I found a defense against Emilia and though I knew it was a weak one to the level of control she had over me, I used it as much as I could. The night after that encounter with the young woman and the vampire at the labyrinth, I decided that I was going to focus all my energies on thinking about Sofia. One memory in particular kept running through my mind, because no matter what Emilia’s control was making me feel, my mind kept reminding me that I wanted to marry Sofia.

“Marry me, Sofia.”

I wasn’t expecting her to even respond, so when she wrapped her arms around my neck and buried her face on my chest, before nodding and saying, “Yes,” it was definitely a taste of heaven on earth.

“What?” I asked her, stepping back, so that I could look at her and make sure that she wasn’t joking. “Did you just say what I thought you said?”

She laughed at my reaction. “I’m not sure…” She tilted her head to the side, her long auburn locks falling over her shoulders. “What did you think I said?”

“It sounded like you were agreeing to marry me.”

She paused and wrinkled her nose before shuffling on her feet. When she heaved an anxious sigh, I was already certain that I was just hearing things.

But then a huge smile appeared on her face. “Then you definitely heard right.”

I was so preoccupied reliving that moment in my mind, I hadn’t even noticed how Emilia was glaring at me from across the table until she slapped my face with the back of her hand.

“I thought you said you loved me, Derek. You’re not even listening to me!”

That’s the point. I don’t love you. “I’m sorry, Emilia…”

I got another blow and then another and then another. Every fiber of my being longed to fight back, longed to retaliate, but I could not. What she was doing was such a stark reminder that I wasn’t in control. I was losing my mind and I knew it. I could access memories of Sofia, but I couldn’t even think about anything that was going on at the castle. Everything was confusing. I knew that I’d only been there for a few days, but it felt as if I’d been there for centuries. My mind was thinking of Sofia and mentally sending sarcastic quips and flat-out rejections Emilia’s way, but I was beginning to feel differently. I was beginning to feel like I was in love with Emilia.

I was losing the battle and I knew it, but I was clinging to every last straw of hope that I could still overcome this, that I could get back to Sofia.

“You love me!” Emilia screamed before once again hitting me. She did it over and over again, screaming the same thing until I couldn’t take it anymore. I didn’t know where the strength came from, but I hit her back so hard she went crashing to the ground.

And for some reason, I knew that she had won something over me based on the way she smirked as I lunged forward to attack her. I hit her and clawed at her. I watched her heal then I did it again. By the time I was done, a sick feeling came over me, because I found her snickering. I watched her heal before she fisted a clump of my hair and kissed me full on the mouth.

When our lips parted, she smirked, tilted her head to the side, and said, “Welcome to the darkness, Derek.”

I then realized why she was acting so triumphant. The act of violence was me giving in to my dark side. She had provoked the part of me that would react with unbridled violence – a side of me Cora knew very well.

“She doesn’t know about this side of you… I’ll introduce it to her when I make you kill her, Derek.”

She kissed me again and I could feel it happen. It was almost as if every memory I had of Sofia faded into some sort of subconscious black hole. I couldn’t even remember Sofia’s face. All that remained was that one strong sense of conviction that told me that I was a man in love with Sofia.

I was under Emilia’s full control for the rest of the day and I couldn’t even think of anything apart from her, but in the back of my mind that thought remained: I love Sofia Claremont. I love her. Not Emilia. I love Sofia.

Still, even that thought didn’t take long to disappear.

My stay at the Elder’s castle felt like an eternity I couldn’t escape from. I was falling in love with the woman I found myself so deeply attracted to from the moment I first laid eyes on her. Emilia was the girl for me and I had no doubt about it, but when it came to her, I was also consumed by another emotion apart from love: fear. Emilia terrified me. Everything about her – even the sweet, doting side of her – consumed me with utter fear.