When I Was Yours(92)

Breaking away from her lips, panting, I press my forehead to hers. “Just promise me one thing.”

“Anything.”

“Don’t ever f*cking leave me again.”

“Never,” she promises. “I will never leave you again.”





Today is what would have been our eleventh wedding anniversary. I say would have been because Adam and I are divorced.

Don’t panic. It’s not a bad thing. It’s a good thing, a really good thing.

Getting divorced was our beginning again. And we needed a new beginning.

We were apart for so long that we needed to go back to the start.

Our marriage, in a lot of ways, was the end for us.

We needed new.

Getting divorced and finding us again were new—but Adam has told me in no uncertain terms that I will be Mrs. Gunner again one day.

And honestly, I can’t wait for that day.

But for now, I’m happy. We’re happy.

In the beginning of us starting again, we just dated. We got to know each other again, and it was fun. It’s still fun.

We deserved fun after everything we’d been through.

But this is Adam and me, and just like twelve years ago, when we first met, we were pretty much inseparable from the get-go.

Two months after we got back together, I moved into the beach house with him. If Adam had had his way, it would have been two days. I just hadn’t wanted to rush things even though I really did want to rush things. My restraint deserves an award.

Dad and Casey moved to Malibu with me. It’s only around a thirty-minute drive into UCLA from Malibu, and Casey and Dad were ready to get back to the beach. I didn’t want to be too far away from them, so it’s worked out perfectly. I’d wanted them to move into the beach house with us, and Adam had been fine with that. But Dad had said that Adam and I needed our own space to just be together. He was right. Crazy as it sounds, even though we were married, Adam and I haven’t ever lived together properly.

We had that one week after we got married, but I was bouncing between the beach house and our old apartment.

Now, we’re actually living together, and it’s amazing.

Adam left the studio. He wanted to sign it all over to his Uncle Richard, but Richard wouldn’t let him. He said Adam might not want any part of it now, but that could change in the future.

Richard proposed a fifty-fifty split of the studio with Adam as a silent partner. Adam reluctantly accepted, but I think a part of him still likes having a reason to be in contact with his uncle.

Richard runs the studio day to day, but he brings over things for Adam to sign when necessary, which is often. I’m glad that Adam still has a connection to someone in his family.

Ava, on the other hand…well, she’s no longer a part of the studio, of course. Adam had it in his head to ruin her career. In the beginning, he was hell bent on revenge.

I told him that the best form of revenge is no revenge at all.

Ruining Ava’s career wouldn’t change the things she had done to him. It wouldn’t make him feel better.

I told him that he needed to let Karma have at her.

Surprisingly, he listened. And he just let go of all the anger and bitterness he felt.

I know he’s freer for it.

Me? Well, I’m still waiting for Karma to do her thing. She sure is taking her sweet time.

Ava has stepped away from Hollywood. But only to New York to star in some big prime-time show. Last I heard, there was talk about an Emmy nomination for her performance.

I guess some people really are the kind who fall in the ocean and come up with a gold watch.

But what Ava doesn’t have is love.

She can star in as many films or TV shows as she wants, win as many awards as she can, but one thing Ava will always be is alone.

Adam never will be alone. He has so people who love him—me, Max, Richard, Dad, Casey, and Grady. And that is what counts above anything else.

Speaking of Grady, he and Adam opened a surf school together. It’s called Off The Hook Surf School.

Adam got the qualifications needed to be able to coach surfing. I’ve never seen him happier than when he is working there with Grady.

Grady still has the Shack, and since I’ve been drawing again, he’s started letting me sell some of my drawings there.

I also help out with admin stuff at the Off The Hook. Dad is working there, too. He’s been doing the accounts. He actually started doing them for the Shack, too. It’s good to see him getting back to doing what he enjoys. He can’t do anything too taxing, and it takes him longer to do the accounts than the average person would, but it’s not like there’s a rush, as they’re the only the accounts he does.

And Casey is doing well in school. She’s happy.

Life now is as it should have been ten years ago.

I’m not bitter about losing those ten years. Do I wish that Adam and I had had all that time together? Of course I do. But we didn’t, and it meant Casey was able to get well. It was how it had to be. Both Adam and I have accepted it because we have each other now, and that’s all that matters.

My cell starts to vibrate on the table beside me, pulling my eyes from the view of the ocean.

I see the name on the display, and I instantly feel sick.

I knew this call was coming. I just didn’t expect it to be today.