VLAD (The V Games #1)(15)

I’m no sun.

But it felt good to shine like one, even if only for a moment.




The voices eventually dull and the house falls silent. I always keep my bedroom door open—an old childhood fear of being trapped alone with the man from an old dream that didn’t seem to go away once I hit adulthood. That’s how I heard the commotion earlier, but tonight, it’s closed. I didn’t want Diana or our parents to hear me crying my sorrows into my pillow.

How does one grieve over something they never had?

I’m not sure, but I’m most certainly grieving. My heart physically aches. Our mother married our father, but there was never love. Not like the storybooks we would sneak and read. Diana would let me curl up beside her in her bed as she’d read adventurous stories about princesses who were brave and still got the handsome prince in the end. Deep down, I always thought Diana and I could be strong and find love. Why couldn’t we have both?

Our world is no storybook, though.

Villains prowl the night—it’s most certainly more nightmare than fairytale.

We’re teased with someone we could love, and then it’s taken away. We’re forced to follow rules that leech the happiness straight from our marrow.

I must accept there are no happy endings for Volkov girls.

There’s a slight tap on the door, pulling me from my inner thoughts, and my sister calls through the wood separating us. “Irina, are you awake?”

I stay quiet and still, hoping she’ll go away.

No such luck.

The door handle twists, and she pushes it open, taking a step inside my room.

“Shadow?”

I hold my breath and hear her sigh before she leaves, closing the door behind her. I inhale to fill my starved lungs, then lean over to flick the lamp on. I let out a startled squeak when I see Diana sitting in the chair in the corner of the room staring back at me. It’s odd to see her in the corner, but she doesn’t look like a shadow. She commands the space. My sister owns it.

Just like she owns my future.

I swallow down the pain and meet her sad stare.

“I’ve known you your whole life, Irina,” she says heavily, her dark brows furrowed. It reminds me of when we were kids and she’d worry over me. So motherly and loving. “I know when you’re sleeping and when you’re not.”

Nerves dance in my gut like there’s a parade happening inside me. “I’m tired, Diana,” I croak, feelings of betrayal rattling my voice. “What do you want?”

She stands, and I scoot into a sitting position, dipping my eyes so I don’t have to look directly at her.

“I know you don’t approve of my choices.”

I huff out a disheartened laugh. “It’s not your choice. That’s the point.”

“Father wouldn’t force me into this, Irina, so it is a choice, and I’ve made the right one for us both.” Her voice is firm and unyielding. It infuriates me that she’s behaving like them. Like our mother. Rolling over and letting the men in our world control our future.

My head snaps up to meet her blue eyes. “What does that mean?”

Sitting on the bed in front of me, she takes my hands and smiles. “You will move with me to the Vasiliev’s estate. No marital arrangements for you will be made. You will make your own choices when you’re ready for those things.” She’s smiling at me like I’m a prisoner and she’s just offered me my freedom. But she’s wrong. I have no plans to bend to the will of our father, or any man who thinks my inheritance and last name would be good business for him. I can’t move to the Vasiliev home with her. To be around Vlad constantly, be around his things, his scent. Watch them bond and fall in love? See him touch her in ways I want him to touch me? Yeah, right. That’s torture. Cruel torture. I wish I’d had the courage to tell her how I felt about Vlad when we were younger so this wouldn’t be happening now. She wouldn’t hurt me like this if she knew she was doing it.

“Do you love him?” I find myself asking, even though I know she doesn’t. Not yet anyway.

The corner of her lips pull up and she lifts a shoulder in a shrug. “I will learn to.” She reaches forward and begins to tickle me, causing me to thrash and screech in surrender. She hasn’t been this playful since we were little, and it’s refreshing. It reminds me that our sisterhood is everything.

Maybe if she can learn, I can learn too.

I’ll learn how not love him.

“If he keeps kissing me like he did tonight, it may be sooner rather than later,” she admits with a giggle, tugging me back on the bed and collapsing next to me on my pillow. We both stare up at the ceiling, breathing a little heavy from the exertion. Her words play around in my mind.

He kissed her.

They kissed.

My heart rate quickens just imagining what his lips would feel like pressed against mine. Silky. Wet. Dominating.

“What was it like?” I ask. Not wanting to know, but desperate to.

The amusement evaporates and silence falls. I swear I can hear my own heartbeat thundering in my chest.

“Soft, but strong,” she murmurs, placing the pads of her fingertips over her lips. “Passionate and intense.” She sits up and leans over me. “Like this.” She bends and places her lips to mine, pushing hard, and all I can think is they do taste of Vlad.